How important are holidays to you?

[nkf]

I don't mean time off work but the going away etc...
My husband is mad about them and I want to rein in our expenses. I can't bear how much our summer holiday this year cost us. And yet I feel like such a meanie for saying we shouldn't.

The day trips?

They are sort of "wouldn't it be nice to..."
and then he makes them happen.

Holidays mean a lot to him and so I've tended to let him have a free hand on them. I don't share his views on them but I know what a bear he can be if he doesn't have the sort of holiday he likes.

But enough is enough. We'll be paying for this one for ages and it's ridiculous.

I think others are going to be more help than me as I avoid heat like the plague, but I'm sure that you can get something that will fit the bill without either of you having to compromise too much, with just a bit of creative thinking.

Twinset, the DCs are hugely excited about Duinrell and it has given DS a big incentive to crack on with learning to swim, he should be fairly OK by Easter. I'm looking forward to seeing the bulbs in the spring so we are all happy.

Yup.

You lot should houseswap.It's fun, it's environmentally sound and it costs nothing.

who wants to swap with me? nice house in herts, near london for two weeks in california?

Go onto the sites.
Guardian has one.
Another is Home Echange.

You'd be amazed at how many foreigners in fab places are desperate to come to UK

teapot I need an incentive to help dd with her swimming.

Was just going to suggest that maybe she could have next year's birthday party at Splashdown until I looked at the prices and figured it is probably practically the same price as my 6 nights at Duinrell

She does keep nagging to go to splashdown.

been having a look at the home exchanges, look quite interesting! my house isn't that big though, compared to some of them!

We rent or would look into home excahnge.

And mine, am saving that as they now see it as a massive treat, so keeping it in reserve for those times when things get so bad you need to come up with something you know will go down really really well !

Nkf, I wonder if it is an idea for you to start a new thread with something along the lines of "holiday challenge" in the title, list your criteria and see what people come up with ?

I could try another post. Feel a little nervous about that though. I started off musing about holidays and then it turned into a challenge type post. Not grumbling but I'm aware that it's rather unattractive to talk about expensive holidays in these times. But hey ho I can take it.

I think the problem is that from your posts that there are a lot of deeper issues about money between yourself and your Dh .

Don't take this the wrong way but I am struggling to understand how your family would end up paying out £6K on a holiday if you genuinely can't afford it and didn't want it ? Is it because your DH has his head in the sand about costs, is he a reckless spender ?

I won't take it the wrong way. And of course you are right. There are deeper issues about money and how it is used. It's complicated and I am trying to find a way through it.

I don't blame you for struggling to understand. I have trouble with it myself.

I do empathise. DH and I have different spending habits, luckily we are both in good jobs and he isn't entirely reckless so I just grit my teeth sometimes and let him get on with it. I also hate having a car on holiday, I like that feeling of being shuttled to my destination and having no responsibilities, but DH does like his little jaunts so we always end up hiring one.

South of France could be a good option, although I would recommend a car. Chez Nous brochure has lots of lovely villas.

I see your point, forget my last suggestion, not one of my better ones and I apologise for pushing for figures, it's just that it is hard to know what to look for without a guideline. Hopefully someone will see this and know exactly the place for you having been there themselves previously.

Personally I think working things through like this is a very sensible thing to do. Hopefully you'll work out any issues there may be in your relationship and be able to work towards finding a way which suits you both. Hugely contentious issue money. We've found that I am much better at managing it than DH so I have now taken control of things. He gets consulted and doesn't get pushed into things but is relieved of the day to day running of accounts which he finds highly stressful and will admit to being pretty bad at. Wouldn't work for a lot of people I guess but it does for us, it's all about finding a way to work it out for you as a couple.

if you do houseswaps don't you need a perfect house? Mine is damp, furniture has holes in and stuffing coming out, peeling wallpaper, cracked windows etc etc
Even I don't want to live here

I did try another post - a holiday challenge type one. And there is nothing to apologise for.

So far, camping in France has been mentioned.

lol
No lots of regular homes on the sites.

I did find Easyjet flights for 2 adults & 2 children to Alicante for May half term from Luton for £343 plus car hire of £94 if that is any help. Put with this villa in Javea which is £370 for a week.

Seems to be on some of complex with pool, tennis courts, restaurant etc, then within walking distance of the beach (it claims 15 mins). Javea is actually very nice with lots of shops and restaurants etc from what I remember plus a reasonable amount of stuff around for day trips.

I don't think it is what you are looking for but it would be £807 for flights, car & villa for May half term, then you'd need petrol & insurance on top of that plus whatever trips you do.

thanks for that link chocolateteapot, I will have a good look later.
£6k is alot, you will definately be able to have a nice family holiday for alot less than that - but you need to budget.
As I said in an earlier post we had 10 days in Spain this year for around £1,200 accom (which wasn't fantastic, but tbh after the initial "oh" when we first saw it, it doesn't matter - it was more than comfortable, really well located and the pool was fab) & flights - and we booked the flights late, it could have been alot less if I had planned in advance. There again we live near Stansted which brings the costs down.
So you need to set a limit for flights & accom.
BUT you then need to set a limit for spending when you are there. Deciding to go somewhere are stay over on the spur of the moment really eats into your money, if this was planned in advance you could do a 2 or 3 centre holiday and not be paying double.
It sounds like budgeting maybe counter culture? However if you are serious about cutting these costs then that is what you need to do.
I have used owners direct or holiday rentals to book accom for quite a few years, lots of lovely places at mainly reasonable rates.