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Indian weding - what to give?

7 replies

lalalonglegs · 03/11/2008 09:45

My mother has been invited to the wedding of an acquaintance in Mumbai. The bride is reasonably well off (by Indian standards) and when my mother asked what gift she would like, she was told not to bring anything. However, we are a bit about this and think it might be more to do with manners and feel that she should give something. So, does anyone know what sort of gift is acceptable at an Indian wedding? Should she give money and, if so, is there any rule of thumb for size of gift? Just to make matters even more confusing for us, the wedding is Parsi rather than Hindu/Muslim so we don't know if that has a bearing on matters. My mother is really keen to take up the invitation but doesn't want to cause any embarrassment/offence by not giving a gift. Any advice would be very gratefully received.

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Jackstini · 03/11/2008 09:49

weddings.iloveindia.com/indian-weddings/parsi-wedding.html Found this on what to expect at a Parsi wedding but no mention of gifts...
There seems to be quite a bit on Google though

dinkystinky · 03/11/2008 11:28

Hi - am indian. If your mum wants to give a gift, she should give some money or a gift voucher (boxed gifts are not great at weddings as lots of people invited). Am hindu but the general rule of thumb for giving cash/voucher gifts is the same as over here in UK for english weddings -give what you feel appropriate.

lalalonglegs · 03/11/2008 20:10

Thanks for your advice dinkystinky but we have no idea what is appropriate amount as the standards of living are so different. Also, having paid to come to the wedding from Europe, my mother will be regarded as a wealthy visitor and perhaps even a VIP so we are struggling slightly. Anyone else have any thoughts - should she take gifts for the family as well? If so, what?

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beeny · 03/11/2008 20:13

I am a muslim Indian a lot of parsis are very rich.Money is a good idea.

dinkystinky · 04/11/2008 17:11

Typically my parents give around £100 for wedding gifts. Gifts for the family (mother or whoever invited your mum) not obligatory but will doubtless be much appreciated - something thoughtful like a photo frame or lovely european toiletries are always good. If your mum is unsure about giving money, she could bring a european type gift (nice vase etc) though alot of Indian weddings specify no boxed gifts on the invites.

lalalonglegs · 04/11/2008 21:03

That's fantastically helpful - many thanks for your advice and pointers. Wish I had been invited - feeling a bit .

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horseymum · 19/11/2008 14:29

my dh is half indian and we went to a cousin's sikh wedding. you give money and everyone was filmed stopping behind the happy couple and dropping cash into lap - get a large denomination note rather than a few smaller ones!!

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