Taking other children ( without their parents) on hols

[MrsGhoulofGhostbourne]

Would appreciate mumsnetters advice! DC (both boys) will be 11 and 9 next summer, and this year in Cornwall we thought they might have had an (even!) better time, if they had taken a friend each. Does anyone else do this and any pitfall I should beware of? We intend to let them choose, but each have a veto on the other's choice if necessary as they need all four to get along. Also the Dc are strong swimmers so can only take those that also are.
Any views/advice very welcome!

I wouldn't have a very relaxing holiday, the responsibility is huge.
We took my nephew this summer and I was relieved to get him home with just one big blister on his foot.
I found it much better to rent a huge property and go with two other families. The DCs all mucked in together and you get the advantages without the responsibility.

I think it is quite a good idea really.

I let me dd2 (8) go away to Wales with her best friend and her parents for a long weekend and all was well.

my not me

My dd did have a small accident whilst away, came off her scooter and skidded along a gravel pathway but her friends parents dealt with it absolutly fine and I didn't hold them responsible in any way shape or form.

We took DSS's friend on holiday when he was 8, they had a great time (though he got a little jealous of her as he was used to be an only child)

I used to go with friends on holiday as a kid loved it.

discuss with parents before about any no no's and money.

Works really well IME, however, make sure the choice is made carefully. You need to be sure that the chosen child did not get chosen as your child wants a quiet life and said child would complain if they were not invited IYSWIM.

Make sure the childs parents are fairly similar to you in parental style so it is not too much of a shock when they are away from the parents also the parent is less likely to feel you did things wrong if anyhting actually does go wrong!

My sister has done this - her two were friends with a conveniently matching pair of siblings, so she took them. Worked brilliantly apparently - obviously if you've got your brother/sister there you are going to feel automatically more at home.

I don't think in either case the relevant sibling was the child's best-in-the-world friend (so if they'd each had free choice they might have picked someone else) but they were good-enough friends, and my sister thought the sibling bit was going to be a real advantage - which it was.

thanks - very useful - will chew over....

Make sure child's parents have written a letter giving you permission to take their child on holiday! Just in case of accident or anything. (You take it with you).

3LF - yes - good idea. I was at passport control at the Eurotunnel this year to be asked why my children's passports were in a different name to mine - never happened before on numerous border crossings, my passport still in unmarried name, would be harder to explain two unrelated children as well

When I was a child we often took friends - and went with friends. From about the age of 7 onwards. Mostly in s/c accommodation. It was brilliant, we all loved it, much less sibling bickering because we each played with our friends (all three of us often had a friend along) - and great for working parents who have the hols to cover!

Once we were teenagers, I think it made us happy to go on family hols for longer.

I don't think I could do it. You have to be nice to other peoples children, and I don't think I could maintain that for a whole fortnight. I'm just not that nice

I have wondered about this for the future. DD is an only child and highly likely to remain that way. Which means the liklihood of us taking another child awy with us in the future is quite high. i think it would have to be a child I knew very well, and preferably I knew the parents quite well too.

For now we choose to go away with friends with their children - easier compromise until DD is older.

I just like to be able to relax and I can't if I am looking after other people's children.
Have you thought of trying a weekend to start with?

We have taken other children skiing with us, and it was great.

If going to USA or Canada, make sure you have a letter of authority from the parents, sometimes immigration get a bit narky!

My son's friend is mixed race, so stood out amongst us, they gave us and him the 3rd degree to make sure he was with us of his own volition!

God no. As someone else said I don't think I could keep up a pleasant facade for a week or more.

I like to relax with just my own family. I think I am fairly unsociable on holiday!

Abbey - good point re weekend!

From age 10 to 16 I went on holiday with my best friend and she would come on holiday with my family too. We therefore spent the entire summer together. We went to cornwall, ireland, highlands, loads of places in the UK. We had a great time and I think our parents welcomed it as we were kept amused by each other, it worked very well and we are still friends today.
I think if you are already a responsible parent then you have nothing to worry about re extra responsibilty IYKWIM.

WT - how lovely to have such an extensive shared history with a friend!