Holiday with 9mo and 5yo kids

[Georgia324]

I guess I just wanted some support as we are flying home a day early from our Jet2 holiday in Gran Canaria (one room - no family suite). I’ve really struggled with sleep, screaming, avoiding the sun, mealtimes, nap routines, everything really. I was already feeling fragile at home but stupidly thought that the break from cooking and cleaning would be a real game-changer. However my 9mo was up at 0415 this morning and wouldn’t go back to sleep until 0615.

I have bipolar disorder so sleep is very important to me. We should have got a suite but they were sold out and I was dead set on the hotel as we came here last year. I’m quite wound up about bottles (he’s formula fed), nap times, etc. Our transfer home starts tonight at lo’s bedtime.. flight is 2230-0230… I’m dreading it so any tips v welcome… ive deleted chat GPT off my phone because I became too dependent on it for emotional support over early wakes and questions I was asking it about my own mental health.

This feels like one of the worst times to go on holiday in terms of development! Crawling and pulling up everywhere, danger everywhere! I’m still under the perinatal mental health team as I got v unwell after my first child (hence the age gap, to an extent). They have been great. Hoping I feel better after a few better nights at home. Gosh it’s really tough having two.

solidarity and ideas would be amazing

With bit of luck after you’ve been on the plane for 45 mins they will dim the lights and the little one will fall asleep. In less than 12 hours you will be in your own home - some times kids can be tricky for the first week back. You just need to cope over night.

Next holiday you will choose a better room.
The youngest will be walking, one nap a day and no bottles so it will be easier.

No advice as such for this situation as you're already in it, but I just wanted to give you a virtual hug and say that sounds really rough. I had a few times like that when mine were little, it is a special kind of hell.

I hope you are now safely home and starting to feel better.

Well done for deleting gpt from your phone. A1/social media can sneak up on you with its crazy addictive ness and get under your skin so unhelpfully.. Recognizing and removing that takes a bit of strength and intelligence, so you've done well.

With the children... It's a hard, hard stage! It WILL get better, but until it does, "less is more" is a good mantra - when you are doing things with the children there is nothing wrong with only putting yourself in situations you know you can handle, with minimum stress.

Thank you very much. Yes, lesson firmly learnt! My husband said that part of him died on the holiday 🫠 The flight was actually easy. My baby slept through from the airport and all the flight without waking, until we were landing. He also snoozed on the coach transfer which allowed him to get through to the gate without screaming the place down.
I’m back on my sofa with him. My 5yo and my husband are asleep. I’ll get my nap later!

These messages are very kind. Thank you to you both. 🙏🏼

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one. Why do you think hotel kids clubs were created?! Most kids clubs don’t start until 4yo, but several hotels offer crèches. You could definitely put the eldest in a kids club next time. They’re really not that bad and my dc still stay in touch with friends they’ve made on previous holidays, and I think some structure/routine each day really helps their behaviour.
Perhaps in the future you might want to agree in advance some times when one of you has the kids and the other gets some completely free time. My DH likes water sports so every day he has some time to himself to do that. I prefer reading, walking and the spa!

Bless you, I’d find a family friendly villa next time as I always felt you were in a bit more control.
Look after yourself xx

Oh and I get how you might want ‘ break’ from cooking but it’s definitely worth the chilled vibe you get from a villa hol. Plus you can keep it simple- easy breakfast and lunch, go out to eat at a time to suit, come back when you want abd put the kids to bed and chill in your own space. I used to feel it was better for the children as well to have that more relaxing home environment.

I refused to go on holidays until this year, my youngest is almost 3. I just could not deal with the stress of a baby abroad , naptimes, crawling & having to bring a pram aswell as everything else along. We saw a baby crawling along the roasting hot ground and I felt so glad he wasn't mine 🤣 Our holiday was still stressful trying to keep the two youngest out of the sun/burning. We didn't expect 30+ temperature. Sorry that's not much help but maybe next time hold off until your little one gets older & hopefully things will be easier.

Thanks, yes definitely villa next time. Sadly nobody wants to go away with a baby but maybe that will improve as he gets older and we can go with friends. I think 3 is a good age to go on holidays - very smart @hellomylov3. Thanks for your support

We’ve had some lovely holidays but we don’t go to the Canary Islands as there’s no time difference and the flight times are awful.

Could a holiday further east work for you? We go to Turkey, Greece or previously Dubai. This gives a 2-3 hour time difference where we keep the kids on UK time so eating at 6-7pm is actually 4-5pm and bedtime is at 9pm after the kids disco and entertainment finishes.

We cound that in the canaries, kids discos start at the same time as these other countries but my kids were exhausted without a time difference.

We have stuck to resort holidays for now whilst they are young and get up later and go to bed later so it sticks to their usual UK wake and bed times.

It works well for us but it is helpful if you can afford a better resort as the food, entertainment, pool slides etc all tend to be a little bit better.

Don’t give up! Hope the flight goes well x