Parents of only children - suggestions?

[Needlenardlenoo]

DH and I are finding it ever more challenging booking holidays with our just turned 13 year old.

She likes hotel/pool/activity/sporty type holidays - but we both burn easily so wouldn't book e.g. a Tui trip somewhere that hovers around 30 degrees in the main school holiday, so that rules out a lot of places.

We've holidayed in e.g. the Canaries and France, but what we'd really like is somewhere with a teens' club or e g. watersports we could book, so she could meet other kids her age without us having to do all the activities too.

When she was younger she was great at making friends in the playground or by the pool, but it just seems to have all dropped off at 12 or 13 and she ends up getting very lonely.

We can't easily take one of her friends with us, for various reasons.

Any suggestions? We did do a small group tour with a fantastically nice family a couple of years back, but if they hadn't been so nice it could have been a nightmare!

Have you done skiing/hiking trips?

Yes when we were younger before we had DD.

She'd love skiing; DH would tolerate it. I find it terrifying and stressful.
I love hiking. DH will tolerate it. DD will whinge her head off unless it involves jumping in a waterfall, which is ok.
There's also cycling where DH and DD can speed off into the distance while I painfully try to keep up and she mocks me.

We're just a rubbish group!

I think you should go to Club La Santa in Lanzarote in the Easter holidays when it's not too hot. It's a sports resort so there'd be sports stuff going on all year round, not just in season, and DH and DD can go off on long bike rides while you relax.

Club la Santa is also great but weaker on watersports than Neilsons. I think these types of holidays would really suit you though. Your DH can go cycling with like minded people, your DD can spend all day up to her neck in water with other teenagers, and you can do whatever you'd enjoy doing. You'll still see each other at meal times and evenings and any activities you wish to do together.

I’d highly recommend the Beachcomber resorts in Mauritius, loads of free watersports, teens clubs and things going on. Climate last August was just lovely and reasonable prices vs Europe (child ages up to 17).

I'd think about sending her on an activity camp with other kids instead as it's clear you don't all want the same things out of a holiday. Get her involved in Guides or Scouts.

Dont go in August, go in May instead

Thanks (and also @MiddleAgedDread) this sounds ideal and was exactly what I was hoping for from this thread.

We've been to Madeira, Tenerife and the Azores so this would work I think re climate.

I find DD does better with something similar to last time and Lanzarote surely can't be that different to Tenerife.

I like to paint!

Absolutely, but that means 5 weeks of school summer holiday to fill having spent all the money! Plus because I teach A-level, I sometimes end up spending a lot of time trying to help students over shonky WiFi!

Thanks, I will look at it.

Sadly, she absolutely refuses to go anywhere with unknown people and is very resistant to hierarchical clubs like Scouts etc although she does play some football.

I'm making it sound like DH and I want rid of her but we actually are more than happy to go places with her -- but she doesn't want to go places with us or we end up in shopping malls and water parks. I draw the line at theme parks.

I do manage to get her to a week's music theatre most summers.

What about Lake Garda? We took a teen there and they loved it. They have euro style camps there but we did a mobile home. Water stuff like paddle boarding, board walks to wander along, ferries to take you to different places on the lake and fab food.

But then you could book yourself in the spa while DD is having ski lessons?

What abut Northern Spain? I've been several times and it's lovely and way cooler than the south. Some fabulous-looking beaches and food and history and varied scenery, etc. Maybe start by looking at San Sebastian?

Plus you could take a Brittany ferry as part of the fun and once you're there, the public transport all along the northern coast was excellent. Narrow gauge railway and speedy coaches.

Yes was going to suggest this! My teen DC made loads of friends in the teens club on a P&O cruise

You need to look at Greenworld holidays! Activity holidays in Croatia and Slovenia with a group of families (about 7/8 families iirc). Aimed at teens, minimum age 10 but majority are teens.

The company will tell you who’s already booked on for which weeks/destinations ie what ages and sexes, so you can pick a week that matches well.

Age range on our week was 10 to 16 (we deliberately chose a “younger” week, there were also weeks with loads of 14-16 yos for example). Unsurprisingly the group contained a lot of only children. Worked really well. Our DCs wanted to hang out with the group the whole time (well after the first night dinner which was typical teen awkwardness!!)

You could also look at Alpine Elements but they won’t tell you the age range booked on so could end up with a bunch of 6 year olds. Silly policy on their part IMO.

We’ve done club La Santa in September just after the schools go back and it’s been hot but not unbearable for activities, we just avoid doing things in full sun in the middle of the day! The one down side I’d say is that unless you get one of the most expensive apartments, the rooms don’t have air con!! Which also puts a mark in favour of Neilsons IMO.

Green World look amazing, @minipie, thank you!

This is a good suggestion. We've had some good trips on Brittany Ferries and have discussed taking them to Santander in the past.

Despite DD's many challenges, she is super excellent at sleeping on trains and ferries!

Enjoy it if you do! I ve stayed in Santander for 6 nights and really enjoyed. (Although I suspect the watersport opportunities and beaches are better in San Sebastian.) If you go, check out the Altamira cave and museum. I really liked it (even though you actually visit a faithful replica) and many kids would love it. It's near Santillana del Mar, which is also terrific. I got there via public transport.

https://www.bradshawfoundation.com/spain/altamira/index.php

PGL have uk and French holiday camps?

Yes, it can be quite tricky and there are typically some awkward moments where they have clearly had enough of each other etc. it also means we need to book an apart hotel and dp and I always get the raw deal sleeping on dodgy sofas so they can get the room for privacy and girly things.

it’s all worth it when you hear the giggles.

it also helps that we are quite disorganised so summer holidays are typically booked with 1-3 weeks notice.

Ahaha, is your DD a mini me?! (Also AuDHD here). Hate walking unless it's with the dogs or the goaties. Second home is on a bike or in the gym. Exercise isn't exercise unless it takes everything out of you 😂low interoception see...and sightseeing by car or train would make me die of boredom even as an adult. I still go on all the waterslides at the water parks on holiday despite my DC telling me I'm too old for it!

We're a neurodivergent and sporty family (DS1 less so as he's got older, more of a gamer these days) and Neilson were always great when the boys were younger. DS2 is an adrenaline junkie, as is DH, DS1 was more into tennis and swimming, and all of us cycle. We were able to mix activities for the boys separately with family stuff.

Hire an ebike and you can pace set for DD and DH on bike rides without knackering yourself too. It's still a decent workout.

You sound brilliant @CrazyGoatLady! Waterslides! I can't imagine anything worse 😂. I am loving the idea of grown up DD still liking them. My bonkers almost certainly ADHD teacher mate does things like that all the time and she's old enough for a Senior railcard...

@StCuntyMcCunterson ah the sofa beds! This has been the first year we've been able to get DD into the bed or room designated for her (albeit only so she can do the aforesaid giggling over Teams with mates). The dodgy beds DH and I have slept in. DD had this anxiety reduction thing where she used to have to repeatedly arrange cushions and cupboards. This always required the master bedroom!