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Holidays

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In-laws and step kids holiday anxiety

8 replies

MyTaupeSeal · 28/07/2025 18:53

My in-laws are taking us away for a week abroad for FIL 70th birthday which involves my partners 2 children from his previous marriage, our 2 yr old and myself who is going to be 6 months pregnant when we go. I am unsure why his sister and their family are not going which would lessen the blow for me having to spend a week away in what is a situation I am dreading. If I wasn’t pregnant I’d be pacifying myself with alcohol to get through it but the whole set up makes me want to not go. We will
have the 7yr old from his previous marriage on the sofa bed in the apartment, the 2yr old likely in the bed with us. It’s the last week of the summer term so I go back to work the day after and it’s consuming my thoughts and ruining my summer break if I’m honest. I went to the GP last week to increase my antidepressants as I just don’t feel I’m coping well as it is. We have differing tastes in food so eating out as we are SC is going to be another anxiety ( I’m health conscious and like to try foods they are more fried and British) as they are paying for it I feel it’s also going to be dictated by them. I didn’t get asked if I wanted to go it was assumed I would want a free holiday.

OP posts:
oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 28/07/2025 18:58

Just say no ? Especially as you weren't consulted.
Sounds like hell to me.

Soonenough · 28/07/2025 18:59

Think you can handle a week ? Use your pregnancy as an excuse not to go everywhere together . Eat earlier so they can go for an evening meal by themselves sometimes. I would even volunteer to stay home with kids . One night maybe get something easy like pizzas and have a few mocktails on the balcony .

pikkumyy77 · 28/07/2025 18:59

Just say no. He can bond with hus older child and you relax at home.

NerrSnerr · 28/07/2025 19:01

What kind of places will they want to eat out at and what kind of place would you prefer? Just wondering in case there was a compromise we could suggest?

You’ve only mentioned the food as an actual issue- is there anything else that is causing worry? Is it going on holiday with his parents that is worrying you or his children?

Branleuse · 28/07/2025 19:03

You dont have to go on things other people book you on without asking.

DeliaOwens · 28/07/2025 19:03

Speak to your Doc, given your recent meds increase. See if they will commiserate with you and write up something formally to say you are not fit to fly?

MyTaupeSeal · 28/07/2025 19:06

I’ve considered this and even wondered if I can ask a GP for a compassion sick note as an excuse - I think I am expected to go as it’s free - a birthday - to parent my child and it will make things more awkward if I don’t go as I don’t have a valid reason to other than I can’t think of anything I’d rather do less. It’s also in 12 days time :(

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MyTaupeSeal · 28/07/2025 19:12

I don’t have any bond with the step children if anything as our relationship has progressed I’ve completely withdrawn from being around them. I have no reason for this either they are nice kids I just don’t enjoy spending extended time with others peoples kids I have sadly discovered a little too late into this relationship. As a mid 40s women I don’t tolerate adults who I’m just not like as well as I used to when I was younger tbh. I’m quite laid back, quiet and enjoy fresh food as it’s Spain I’d like to eat in Spanish restaurants for example. MIL is loud and a negative person always complaining about things. FIL is often off smoking for some peace and quiet.

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