Need time off during term time in school job

[AlertRubyTurtle]

Hello, I’m looking for advice. Apologies for the long message.

I am a qualified primary teacher gaining QTS 5 years ago and since then have been working full time in a private nursery (at the time the early years sector appealed to me and I wanted to gain experience in this area).

In January I began maternity leave after having my first baby.

Now that I’m a mum the idea of returning to my current work place doesn’t appeal to me. The hours and days are long and besides that I think it would be too far to travel with having my own child now especially with dropping off / picking up from nursery when she starts (when I started working there I lived much closer with my parents).

I was actually hoping to transition into a school job which would obviously be term time, particularly special educational needs schools as this sector interests me. There are several schools local to me taking on for September for teaching assistant roles (which I would want before thinking of becoming a teacher as it would give me experience).

I have 2 problems. Firstly, I will still be on statutory maternity leave until October, but was hoping to take an extra month and return to work November time. Would this be an issue if the start date is advertised as September?

Secondly, which I think is a bigger problem, my childhood best friend is getting married next September 2026 and typically has booked it midweek the first week of term. I’ve looked at the dates and I’d be in school for the very first day if successful but would then need the next 3 days off (traveling down, staying overnight, wedding next day, staying overnight and traveling home day after wedding as it is some distance away). I am also her bridesmaid so I can’t miss it and everything is booked and paid for.

Even though it’s pre booked would it be a problem especially being the first week of term? Baring in mind I can’t change it the way you can with a holiday, it’s out of my hands. Also, at the time of the wedding I would have been employed for almost a year if I got the school job, it wouldn’t be like I’d be starting the job then so they would already know me.

Any advice please, especially if you’re a teacher or know someone who has been in a similar situation.

Thanks

I work in an SEN school, we employ TAs year round and it’s not unusual for trained teachers who don’t have any SEN experience to start with us as TAs. We also have HLTA roles which some new teachers go into as an in-between. I can’t see a November start being an issue in my workplace.

For the wedding it will very much depend on the school, mine probably would permit a pre-arranged wedding at the start of term for a TA. It probably wouldn’t be permitted for a teacher or HLTA that early in the term. All you can do is let the school know if you make it to interview and see what they say; in my school if you interviewed well it would be fine as we would value a member of staff who had childcare experience and training highly.

With the wedding, how many days in total are you missing?

is it just 3 days total in the first week of term? If so, it might be doable that cover could be found to support this. I assume the first week of term is super important to schools but it’s mainly introductions etc right? Not core work that a TA can’t catch up on and get back into the flow of things?

ultimately your friend is a bit shit for booking a wedding abroad & mid week - she surely doesn’t expect everyone to put off applying for jobs to ensure they can attend.

Working as a TA isn’t a bad thing - I did it. You just have to set boundaries with SLT

I’d say that wanting to attend a friend’s wedding enough that you’d be prepared to jettison a new career for it means you might not yet be in a position where this change of direction is right for you.
Personally I’d return to my existing job, see how it goes and make decisions from there- after the wedding if it is very important to you to be there

Look at the private sector - they may start later. But no they won’t entertain starting late and I doubt you could start in November if they need a teacher for September.

i would consider looking at working as supply, take a contract eh maternity cover until July 26 then look for something once you are back from holiday

On my 25 years experience of teaching, but this isnt the case everywhere, you’d get unpaid leave for a wedding where you were bridesmaid.

It is very possible to get the job, with them knowing you are on maternity leave and due to finish that in november. Whether they hire you depends on their options. Just let them know in the cover letter.

I know someone who was frequently at weddings. She said always say you are bm or your dh is groomsman. Youre never just a guest.

Would part time/job share teacher role be an option? Might be better work life balance and hopefully can organise non working days to cover the wedding.

Alas even in the independent sector this was categorised as unpaid leave. Be careful with indie start dates in September as sometimes our training is right at the start of September as Summer break can start on 4th July or thereabouts.

Get permission as early as possible.

The pay sucks, but I absolutely understand being a TA first, especially with a young baby! (I am a TA with an early years degree after deciding against doing the teaching qualification afterwards for that reason)

Time off for a wedding would usually be approved, especially being booked already, just maybe unpaid. I cant say about starting November though... but you do tend to find TA jobs come up regularly though if not limiting yourself to one school.

Yes - we tend to have three INSETS early Sep.

Just me that thinks it's weird that someone who knows their best friend is a teacher would book their wedding during a time notoriously hard for them to get off work? The beginning of Sept? I'm all for doing what suits you but your best mate?

My school allows you to take 2 days term time for a close family member wedding, otherwise it’s 1 day.

Before I started the role, I had a wedding of a non close family member overseas in term time which would require 2 days off. I told them about it when they offered me the job and they did allow me to take it.

Yes you can 😂 it’s unpaid and up to the head teacher’s discretion. My friend’s a TA and got half a day last week to go and see Alanis Morissette in concert. Might be harder for teachers but they can still get special leave for weddings etc

I was allowed to honor my prebooked leave BUT not allowed to then book any once I began my school job. But I think they will be asking why you’re applying for a TA job and not a teaching position. So just be clear in your answer.

She’s trained to be but currently works in a nursery all year round (when not on mat leave).

It's unclear from the wording of the OP, but have you actually been working as a teacher in the nursery? If you did your NQT year, plus another 4 years there, you have 5 years experience of being a teacher and shouldn't need to work as a TA to gain experience before teaching in an SEN school.

She currently works in a private nursery not a school. She wants to apply for a job in a school.

I applied for a job as a TA and because my holidays were already booked the school said they'd honour them. I did make sure I raised the booked holidays at the interview

I know a few people that did that-they said they enjoyed working with kids but were sick of having no free time, so as a TA, they only needed to work 8-4, and actually got the evening, weekends and holidays to spend with their own kids. I obviously don't know if this will apply to OP.

When I got my first teaching job, I said I would accept it if I could take 3 days to go to my friends' wedding in California, a pain, I couldn't stay longer, but flew out after school on Wednesday, missed Thurs and Fri and flew back Sun/Mon, back in school Tues. They didn't even cut my wages. I was happy not to take the job if they said no, but this head valued work-life balance, etc.
His brother started teaching the same week in the UK and didn't ask!!
It really depends on the school.

All the teachers at my school return part-time after maternity. I would keep your existing job on job-share or PPA cover and wait out any maternity pay-back. You might find that works well for you, but if you still don't like it after that, you could apply for new jobs in spring and start after the wedding. Major life events happen and a good employer should be understanding particularly if you can start after the time away, so they're not paying you.

I’d similar but thankfully was allowed to go in the end. Line manager said no originally so it was looking like partner & DD (flower girl) would be attending my sister’s wedding overseas but not me. HT stepped in as It equated to 4 days off & I arranged my own cover (OK’d by HT) so I could attend. That said, I wasn’t popular as, on my return, I announced my 2nd pregnancy. By that time I wasn’t caring what my line manager thought!

My friend is a TA she moved from school to another which had different half terms. She explained in the interview that holidays were booked and they gave her a weeks unpaid leave

You can buy leave with some councils