Teacher Mom

[KTeachMom]

I am from the US. I have one daughter, whom I dedicate my life to, and am home with in the summer because I am a teacher. She is very spirited and strong willed. My husband and I are going through our own issues which leave me over weekends, I’m switching jobs so I am grieving the loss of my old work family since they gave me support at work and through personal struggles. I’m at a loss of what to do daily with my daughter so we do t get into a funk while not spending money everyday on activities. Every summer it seems as it gets worse. She is spoiled and treats me as her personal assistant. What do other moms out there do in similar situations? Wake and shower before the day, get up and relax, follow a schedule still even through kid is school aged, plan activities for certain days, help! I want her to have the best summer while still keeping my mind

Unfortunately she doesn’t have close friends and I do t have friends with young children or close friends to even do that with.

Could you put her in holiday club for a couple of days a week with people her own age?

All this talk of “centre of your world” and “ dedicate my life to” is cringe and a bit 🤮 ect its very concerning , you need a life and hobbies

arrange play dates so she is out of your hair and get on and enjoy your holiday

your husband can take charge if a few weeks so it’s not all on you

us kids do camp don’t they ?

i collect crafting kits/ kids chemistry set jigsaws from charity shops for Few months running up to summer hols

films and screen also

There are summer camps for kids, why send when I’m off? She cries when the thought of camp is mentioned.

As I said, we do all the crafting and such here and there. Thanks for your suggestions!

We had friends over and then DC went out for the day to visit the friends.
We had a reading half hour after lunch - we all sat and read, even visiting friends.
DC always kept a scrapbook in the summer so had to spend sometime before supper drawing pictures and writing up what they’d done.

You still haven’t said how old she is.
Why does she not have any friends?
You are already doing so much with her and for her. I really think you need to take a step back and let her find her things on her own.
I also think that a day or even just a morning of clubs or similar without you would be beneficial.
I would be focusing some energy on building her some friendships.

She is 7, going into 2nd grade in the fall. She has friends in school, but we don’t see them outside of school with the exception of one and that is maybe once or twice due to their mother’s schedule.
As I said, we are home most days where she does play and yes, I play with her. There times where she will occupy herself and when those times occur I let her alone and let her do her thing because I do understand the importance of her gaining some independence.

Sorry this was supposed to say
How OLD is you daughter OP?

Damn autocorrect on phone 🤦‍♀️

She needs some time with other kids. Does she do any sports or hobbies? My dd always did gymnastics and swimming clubs throughout the holidays. We would get a big piece of paper, draw out a calendar and then fill in things to do. Once a week there would be a bike ride or walk, one playdate, one more expensive day at an attraction one day at home, one day of shops and chores and one where they would entertain themselves playing out in the neighbourhood.

Hi OP!
I understand this, my little fella has just turned 6 and it can be hard to know what is best.
I find a little routine and back up activities helps.
So..... 😇
Stick with breakfast and lunch (or brunch if timetable dictates) and get some good snacks in that are easily accessible.
I always get some arts and crafts stuff in and baking supplies for cookies /cakes in, as well as DVD's and books on hand (for when it rains).

I get some chalk sticks in, bubble wands, and I make sure hes got a football or scooter or bike to play with (for when it's sunny).

Try and arrange a play date or two, as they need their own peer group and it breaks up the week 😇
Are you in a school /class whatspp group for your child, to keep in touch with other mums?
We usually say on the WhatsApp group 'we're off to the local park if anyone fancies meeting up?' and sometimes his friends will indeed meet us there, sometimes they're busy.
But a whatsapp group with other school mums is a great way to keep in touch /organise play dates! 😊

We also have a holiday club that is local and it's fab, he usually goes for one or two afternoons in the week, as his school mates also go, and that way he gets to see his pals for an afternoon or two!

Ans last but not leadt, another mum last year, showed me how her two little boys made their own summer time bucket list of activities and she tried to honour that list.
It was sweet as they had lots of ideas and she said she wouldn't have thought of half of them! 🤗
I will try to upload a list that i found online aswell.
I think I googled summer time bucket list kids or something like that? 🤔
Hugs to you, it can be hard to know where to start sometimes 🫂
*edited to say ... one day in the week we would have a big day out to either a theme park or visit somewhere like an aquarium etc.

Do you have a local park OP?
Or support from family or friends nearby?

Do you have any friends with similar aged children you could meet and then they'd play together so you wouldn't have to play with her all the time.

We started earlier (age 3) with the concept of ‘family time out’. It’s an hour where every family member is at home doing their own thing. With DS, we started with 15 mins at that young age and quickly worked up. Now we use it whenever he and a parent are home all day. He (now 8) plays in his room and has an audio book on. We’ve also had lots of conversations over the years about what he has played - to show interest, to help him see what makes him calm and happy, and to help him develop his ideas.

He’ll even take himself off for family time out now :-D

When home all day I stick to a rough schedule split by the three meals.

At his age, though, we also use days at holiday club, and half days with him meeting up on his own with friends in the village and/ or bringing them back to the house. That’s European village life.

Day camp, check out local museums or colleges for any activities? Send her to family for a weekend? She needs to become a little more independent.
And i second involving her in the housework and cooking. Life isn't always fun and she'll be your age before she appreciates the work you are putting in. Step back from being her play thing, she'll only get worse as the teenage years kick in.

What about working towards a project that takes some days to complete. With Pawprints, if you click on a badge you can download the challenge pack. If you can’t get the badges in the US you could still do the challenge and arrange your own reward/ award. https://pawprintfamily.com/

The National Trust has a set of activities on its website called 50 things to do before you are 11 3/4. They might give a focus for your trips to the park and you’ll be able to judge if any are unsafe in your local area (thinking you might not want to roll down a hill if there’s a danger of disturbing a snake). You can buy the book online, e.g. from Amazon, if you can’t access the site.
https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/visit/50-things

Love this 👆 💙 💯

Littlejellyuk thank you for being compassionate! I love your ideas! It is nice when there are others who can understand. I appreciate it!

Get some books. Have reading time, quietly, alone and separate, or in the same room if you must. Teach her to be independent! It doesn’t mean you don’t love her, far from it.
just enjoy time together & apart.
if you read for 30 minutes, she can tell you about it after. (Or an audio book if she’s not a great reader).

So basically you have never allowed her to have to entertain herself, thats your problem. You shouldn't be planning/providing stuff for her to do all the timelet her find her own things to do ita a good skill to have

Why hasn’t she got any friends?

It’s really tricky when you just have one - I do understand.

Ask her to write a Summer holiday bucket list with you. Try to include lots of free or cheap activities.
look on Pinterest together for examples

E.G.

learn to bake cookies
write a postcard to grandma and post it
try out a new park
learn to make friendship bracelets
go to the beach
go to a zoo
have a water fight
have a disco
make badges
make slime
if you are lucky enough to have a pool get some diving toys for her to practice diving skills
learn a new skill - ice skating, knitting, whatever
things she can do on her own like jewellery making, or mine loved Hama beads at that age.

BUT you must try and find a way for her to socialise with kids her own age - try to find a group to join or contact parents from school. Play dates are essential for both of you. She’s going to get so dependent on you if she has no other social connections.