Page 2 | Going away but really dont want to

MikeL1993 · 2025-04-30T17:36:30+00:00

I’m going away on a stag do this weekend but I really don’t want to. It is for my future brother in law and we’re going to Madrid. The majority of the people going are going Friday to Monday but me and my dad are flying Friday morning and flying back on Sunday morning so in total we’re not even going to be there for 48 hours. Stag do’s really aren’t mine or my dad’s thing and we’re only going because we feel like we have to. I just don’t want to go because it’ll be the first time I’m leaving my girlfriend and my 11 month old baby. My girlfriend has reassured me they’ll be fine and I’ll be back before I know it but it doesn’t make me feel any easier about going. Does anyone have any advice as to how I can survive the weekend without getting upset?

Original poster

MikeL1993 · 01/05/2025 19:16

TreesAtSea · 01/05/2025 18:54

I think you sound like a lovely dad and partner. As many others have said, concentrate on spending time with your own dad while away, try to see a few sights and the weekend will soon pass. To spur you on, just think how happy you'll feel when you see your girlfriend and baby again on your return.

I’m hoping we can spend Friday afternoon/evening and a large part of Saturday exploring to help pass the time more quickly.

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ohyesido · 01/05/2025 19:34

You have my permission to give it a miss.

life is too short to spend time doing something you really don’t want to do. Stay home with the missus

Skirtless · 01/05/2025 19:39

MikeL1993 · 01/05/2025 16:29

I just don't want to leave them.

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OP, this is weird. You presumably leave the house to work, see friends, exercise etc. You are basically only one full day away from home. You will see your partner and your baby on Friday and Sunday. You just won’t see them on Saturday. What’s really going on here? Are you a terribly anxious homebody?

Original poster

MikeL1993 · 01/05/2025 19:41

Skirtless · 01/05/2025 19:39

OP, this is weird. You presumably leave the house to work, see friends, exercise etc. You are basically only one full day away from home. You will see your partner and your baby on Friday and Sunday. You just won’t see them on Saturday. What’s really going on here? Are you a terribly anxious homebody?

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I’ve always been a home bird.

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Original poster

MikeL1993 · 01/05/2025 19:43

ohyesido · 01/05/2025 19:34

You have my permission to give it a miss.

life is too short to spend time doing something you really don’t want to do. Stay home with the missus

I tried everything to get out of it but ultimately my dad thought it was important both me and him went even though he’s not fussed about it either so paid for my flights and hotel room as I couldn’t afford to go.

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ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 01/05/2025 23:04

In my experience it’s the trips that we are a bit apprehensive about which turn out to be the best. Probably because expectations are low so we aren’t disappointed.

I’m sure you’ll have a better trip to Madrid than the one my DH and DS went on recently - planned a trip for a football game on Sunday and hadn’t realised the date had switched to the Saturday when they were still travelling in so they missed it. They had a good time anyway and I’m sure you will .

Original poster

MikeL1993 · 02/05/2025 05:07

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 01/05/2025 23:04

In my experience it’s the trips that we are a bit apprehensive about which turn out to be the best. Probably because expectations are low so we aren’t disappointed.

I’m sure you’ll have a better trip to Madrid than the one my DH and DS went on recently - planned a trip for a football game on Sunday and hadn’t realised the date had switched to the Saturday when they were still travelling in so they missed it. They had a good time anyway and I’m sure you will .

Edited

I hope you’re right about because I’m not looking forward to the trip I’ll end up enjoying it, I’ve had a few people say that.

I’m leaving for the airport in an hour and I’ve barely slept all night.

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zerored · 02/05/2025 05:14

I don't know why people are being so harsh with you as I bet the responses would be different if it was a mum not wanting to leave her 11 month old baby to go on a hen do that she didn't want to attend. I get it and I wouldn't want to leave my young child over a weekend to go drinking either. It looks like you're going so try have a nice time but in future it's ok to say no to things you really don't want to do.

Original poster

MikeL1993 · 02/05/2025 05:23

zerored · 02/05/2025 05:14

I don't know why people are being so harsh with you as I bet the responses would be different if it was a mum not wanting to leave her 11 month old baby to go on a hen do that she didn't want to attend. I get it and I wouldn't want to leave my young child over a weekend to go drinking either. It looks like you're going so try have a nice time but in future it's ok to say no to things you really don't want to do.

Trust me after this I definitely will be saying no. As I’ve said before I did say no originally but it caused a lot of tension so I backed down and agreed to go.

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HighLadyofTheNightCourt · 02/05/2025 08:25

It's 48 hours
It's good to have a break and you should view it as quality time with your dad.
Madrid is a beautiful city so spend some time exploring- you don't have to stay with the group the whole time.

It's easy to stop doing things for yourself when you have a young baby. It's good for everyone to a break.

I'd say the same if it was a woman posting.

Btw... my DH went on a works trip to Asia when DS was 8 weeks old. We all survived and even though he missed us he enjoyed the experience.