I'm having an issue with my ex-partner in coming to an agreement over taking the kids abroad for a short holiday. We have been separated since November 2023 and it's the first time I've approached her on the topic. Our kids are 5 and 7 and I'd like to take them away at some point in the year.
When I raised that I would like to do this, she shot down the idea, saying she wouldn't feel comfortable with me travelling with the kids alone in a foreign country. It's clear that she suffers from a degree of anxiety when away from the kids, as she never agrees to a situation where I get to be with them longer than 48 hours.
I often find that communications with her break down, as she will tend to fire back a list of demands at me such as checking in with her periodically or wanting to know details of this, that and the other. I find that quite difficult as she has already limited my time with them, so it feels like she won't let me enjoy my time with them in peace. I limit contacting her when she has the kids.
Despite her withdrawing consent for me to take the kids away, I have granted her consent to take them away (they're currently away now). I don't think the kids should miss out on this kind of thing as holidays are such great memories for them.
In between responses, she will often say she is contacting her lawyer. Previously, her lawyer had advised on a very conservative settling-in schedule when they were starting to stay with me after the separation - it really limited my time with them to an unbearable level. During this time however, she introduced the kids to her new boyfriend. Whilst the topic of the holiday has been in discussion, she shared that she is now pregnant. It's clear to me that she wants to limit change when it comes to anything concerning me, but is happy to make broad changes when it comes to anything concerning her.
She has said that she only wishes to speak through lawyers on the subject now. My lawyer has said there's a very good chance I could get the holiday granted if applying to the court, but my ex seems adamant that she can block it somehow. All seems a bit unnecessary to me. Maybe I just go for it? I'm concerned it will wreck the amicability for good, but even just by writing this out, I'm thinking to myself, maybe it's gone already...