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Original poster

Permission to travel consent

13 replies

Vicky2024 · 29/11/2024 12:46

hello, I’ve booked a holiday to Spain for July with my two boys one has my surname the other doesn’t. My youngest boys father sadly passed away who doesn’t have my surname but I have his Dads original death certificate. I’m worried for my eldest son who has my surname. We have no contact with his Dad in years. Can’t even go to court as they ask for mediation meetings first which costs money I don’t have and not entitled to legal aid. I did try to contact his dad who said he would sign for permission as he’s on his birth certificate but he has no ID (typical) so can’t even get it notarised by a solicitor. Would a written letter from him be enough or should it be typed up on a computer and signed. So anxious we are going to get turned away at border control. Vicky

OP posts:
House4DS · 29/11/2024 23:45

You'll be fine.
Ive never been stopped and questioned. We've flown loads.
For peace of mind, take the letter and ask that it includes a contact number. Don't worry about it not being notarised.
You've got a return flight booked, presumably your DS is old enough to tell immigration you are his mum and his dad is at home should they ask.

House4DS · 29/11/2024 23:46

And yes just take a written letter if that is easiest.

Panickingnowhelp · 30/11/2024 00:13

I take my 2 away every year and I have no contact with their dad.
I've only been questioned on the way back in and have just had to show the birth certificates showing that I am their mum. This year my youngest was 10 so we could use the e-gates so didn't even have to speak to anyone.
Going to Spain they've never asked for anything to show I had consent to take them away.

Don't worry you'll be fine.

Original poster
Vicky2024 · 30/11/2024 11:46

I know don’t particularly want to even see him to beg for a signature he’s not even bothered about him. Kills me to even ask him to think he has power when he’s not supported him in years. It’s just so annoying he’s not even got a passport to prove his ID so technically anybody could sign it so I’m just worried it won’t be enough xx

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 30/11/2024 11:49

Slightly different but I used to take a permission letter from the parents of the DDs friends when I took them abroad under 16.
I used to present it with the passport but was only specifically asked and they just read them and handed them back with no further checks

Original poster
Vicky2024 · 30/11/2024 11:50

My son has autism and learning difficulties so probably be too shy too speak to a stranger. He hasn’t seen his dad in years it’s just so annoying I’d rather have gone through court but they don’t make it easy to apply so I’m kind of stuck x

OP posts:
bridesmaid1024 · 30/11/2024 12:06

Written letter by him - with his name & phone number on it; maybe his date of birth if you're feeling to cover all bases - and then a copy of your sons birth certificate taken with you will be enough.

It doesn't have to be notarised by a solicitor or typed up (can be typed if you want it to be though)

House4DS · 30/11/2024 16:05

@Vicky2024 if it is hassle, just don't bother taking a letter.
I've been flying with my kids alone for about 15 years.
Last year was the first time I bothered with a letter, and only because we had a short layover in the US.
The kids have never been asked who I am, or where their Dad is.
Noone asked for the letter.

jeaux90 · 01/12/2024 16:23

Written letter yes.

I eventually got a CAO in place though so I didn't have to ask, enables you to take them out the country for 30 days without permission. But if you can easily get a letter then you are fine.

Original poster
Vicky2024 · 01/12/2024 19:27

That’s what I wanted so I’d never have to worry. But can’t just pay for a court meeting have to go through mediation. Don’t even want to speak to him let alone be in a room with him begging just for him to sign something. It’s really annoying x

OP posts:
jeaux90 · 03/12/2024 07:01

@Vicky2024 I did the CAO and the ex wasn't there, he just signed the paperwork so it wasn't a big deal.

Really depends on your situation if course but it did cost me around 3k to get done unfortunately

Original poster
Vicky2024 · 03/12/2024 13:24

Ooh god can’t afford that that’s how much the holiday costing. Going to just have to hope for the best.

OP posts:
samarrange · 03/12/2024 17:21

Spanish immigration will not blink at the different surnames. They are aware that British women often change their last name on marriage (unlike Spain, where it is totally unheard of) and they are not on the lookout for kids being kidnapped to a holiday destination by someone who also has their other child with them, reservations for 10 days at a hotel, and a return ticket.

In order to not let you in, they would have to be prepared to deport you (since they can't just leave you airside). That would mean that they would have to call in children's social services, the police, a lawyer for you, etc etc. They are not going to do that unless there are huge red flags, starting with the different-surname DC looking extremely unhappy.

Bottom line, millions of mixed-surname groups go on holiday every year, and in the absence of a missing-child alert, Spanish passport control don't have time to waste interrogating all of them (and violating their privacy) in case they turn up a case once in a decade.

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