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Holidays

Use our Travel forum for recommendations on everything from day trips to the best family-friendly holiday destinations.

Original poster

Teen DS to go on holiday alone?

109 replies

4andnotcounting · 01/11/2023 22:30

I’m looking for some advice. My ds1 and ds2 will be 18 and 16 in July 2024 (both will have finished their yr 13 and yr 11 exams. )I have promised them a holiday abroad for years. None of us have ever been abroad. Despite planning, I’ve found I Cant afford for us to all go as a family. I didn’t want to let them down again and so suggested would they want to go on their own instead? (eldest child very mature - ds2 respects and listens to ds1. )
(I have previously asked family if someone would take them but always let down - to I think mainly because It’s chool hols it’s dearer. )
ds’s want to go but they don’t know where? They’ve suggest Australia and canada.😮 I said what do you want to do there and they said they don’t know and for me to plan something . I haven’t a clue I’ve never been abroad on holiday. I think it’s very far and very expensive.

Does anyone have any suggestions where they could go for a week and what kind of things they could do for that week? (Any country suggestions) It would be end of June July time )straight after exams finish) I want them to be safe and have a fun experience. I am really rubbish at this sort of thing. I never went on holiday as a child either . It feels a bit daunting but I really don’t want to let them down again.

any suggestions / advice appreciated . Thanks

OP posts:
Undunne · 02/11/2023 07:06

You should be able to get some cheap flights to somewhere in Europe for the 3 of you in June for after the exams finish. Just avoid school holidays!

What's your budget for the 3 of you?

crumblingschools · 02/11/2023 07:09

Check the dates for contingency exam date and look at going on holiday straight after that, so get cheaper holiday than normal summer holiday dates

Lordofmyflies · 02/11/2023 07:12

First of all, Australia or most of US for a week is crazy. You'll only have a couple of days there. Hotels require the guest to be 18 to stay in a room or have the 18 year old take responsibility which is a big ask imo.

I would search the budget airlines - eayjet and Ryanair and jet2 etc for destinations accessible from your nearest airport at those dates. See what is cheap. Make a list of the top 5.
Then simply search for accommodation in those areas, get an idea of costs and activities.

Blackcatowner44 · 02/11/2023 07:13

I said what do you want to do there and they said they don’t know and for me to plan something

This doesn't make them sound mature enough to travel alone yet.

I certainly wouldn't send the 16 year old off alone.

If you can afford a trip to Australia or Canada for two you can afford a week in the sun somewhere for the three of you. Look around at different travel companies and see what comes up for your budget.

Failing that, I'd give the 18 year old a sum of money to go on holiday with his mates (if he chooses) then do the same for the 16 year old when he turns 18.

savethisusernametoday · 02/11/2023 07:17

If they'd never been abroad before I think Australia is a pretty tough induction. It also wouldn't be worth going for just one week as they'd spend at least 3 days of that on an airplane and the rest of the time probably feeling quite jet lagged.

I'd start small! Give them a budget and ask them to research and plan their own trip (it's a good life skill!) and for a first solo adventure, I'd defo keep it within Europe. They can build up their confidence around airports and how to navigate their way around different currencies etc and then maybe plan for a bigger trip in a couple of years.

Jeffjefftyjeff · 02/11/2023 07:19

I found getting travel insurance was tricky for my 16 year old last year (he travelled alone to meet up with another family). In the end World Nomads sorted me out thanks to advice on here.

Winter42 · 02/11/2023 07:22

If you would still like to go as a family this is how we keep cost down....

Go on the Skyscanner website and search for flights to anywhere in the whole of August, or whatever month you want. We have always been able to find flights somewhere suitable for £59-£100 per person. Then look for cheap accomodation in that area.

Good options are air BnB, big European campsites, etc.

I don't know what you have looked at so far but you can get a hol for a lot less than package deal prices. If they have finished exams and can go before school hols start it will be a lot cheaper too.

crumblingschools · 02/11/2023 07:24

DS went to mainland Greece after A-levels with a group of friends. Did it on a shoestring budget, EasyJet, hand luggage only, small air bnb. Sure you could do something similar for the 3 of you cheaper than sending 2 long haul.

pinkdelight · 02/11/2023 07:25

I think she's using their suggestions of Australia and Canada to show how clueless they are about costs. She's not saying she can afford holidays there, far from it.

And that's partly why I wouldn't feel they're ready to go alone. The 18yo could feasibly go with mates who'd been before but to have him responsible for the 16yo and everything else is a big ask and not a great move.

Stop guilting yourself about letting them down. They're old enough to understand the realities of what things cost and should know how strapped most of the country is right now. Either find a way to all go together - even if it's just a city break or cheap off season deal - or save the money up till next year.

Mum5net · 02/11/2023 07:30

Remember that passports need to be applied for early and can be expensive, too, so get those organised asap.
travel insurance also necessary as soon as they make their flight bookings.

FrillyGoatFluff · 02/11/2023 07:31

If they've not been abroad before, for gods sake don't send them interailing. A package holiday to a hotel would be less daunting. Interrailing is all well and good and a great experience, but probably a bit much for two kids who haven't experienced travel 🙄

One flight, one transfer, one hotel base - easy.

JustWhatWeDontNeed · 02/11/2023 07:33

Confused if you can afford to send them to Australia or New Zealand then you can afford a family holiday in Europe. Bloody hell.

I certainly wouldn't send an untravelled 18 year old to Australia to supervise a 16 year old.

They should both be capable of researching well enough to say what they're interested in doing/seeing and how much it costs. If they can't manage that then they won't manage on the ground.

DelphiniumBlue · 02/11/2023 07:36

How are you saying you can't afford to go but can afford to be thinking about 2 adult- cost flights to Australia?? Get some perspective, and look at costs. Inter railing in Europe or shorter flights for all of you would work out cheaper. They don't even know where they want to go, and want you to plan and arrange it...that doesn't sound like teenagers who are ready to travel alone.

Longma · 02/11/2023 07:38

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines. at the request of it's author.

Nokoolaidherethanks · 02/11/2023 07:38

No way would I be sending teens who've never been abroad away on their own. My teens have flown alone but with an adult meeting them at the other end. And they have been abroad a few times with family. A 16 year old who has never been abroad doesn't have good life skills for a big trip.
As above, stick with Europe and go with them, or at least plan it all carefully with them.

HardcoreLadyType · 02/11/2023 07:39

All of my DC started doing city breaks with friends at 18. It’s not something I needed to get involved with - they announced they were doing it, and we made sure the dates fitted with other family plans. (I have also helped with practical things like booking online, etc, if they asked.)

Are you better to let them know that the money is there (and give a budget) for a holiday (together or separately) and leave it to them to plan something?

Rewis · 02/11/2023 07:39

Australia and Canada are insanely expensive. Are you paying for them? With that money all of you could have several holidays in different European countries (within reason obviously)

They should start with an "easy" western or central European destination. Also they need to sort out their own travel and their own planning. If they need mom to make them in itinerary then they shouldn't be going alone.

Darhon · 02/11/2023 07:40

Perfect opportunity to go out of term time, unless you are a teacher. You can book late June as they will both be finished. An apartment and Ryannair flights will be doable if you’re thinking you can send 2 abroad. I’d go somewhere like Barcelona- cool
city and it has a beach

Longma · 02/11/2023 07:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines. at the request of it's author.

theduchessofspork · 02/11/2023 07:41

OP if you can afford to send them both to
Australia, then you can afford to go to Europe as a family - so just do that.

TheaBrandt · 02/11/2023 07:42

It’s quite a leap to have never been abroad then to go alone at such a young age.

Legally it’s fine. My 16 year old (lower 6th) and a friend went to Barcelona for a language course last summer so lightly supervised but not really but school were there of issues which there weren’t - but both sensible and v experienced travellers.

TheaBrandt · 02/11/2023 07:44

Actually Barcelona was a great option. Sunny cool lots to do culture art beach and nightlife. Dd met lots of other nice young people on their gap years out clubbing fun Australian girls . She felt safe in the nightclubs lots of female bar staff etc. she is going back this summer!

Mum5net · 02/11/2023 07:45

When they book flights, look at the times of day they will arrive and depart.
If they have very early flights you need to factor in check in times of up to 3 hrs before flying.
There can be hidden costs like a hotel for very late or early checking in.
I would consider sending them on a flight to Malaga for 3 nights.
it’s a safe city with close airport and a beach. Trains from the airport to the city are short and cheap.

EarringsandLipstick · 02/11/2023 07:45

OP, your post is insane!

Firstly as PP have said, if you can fund 2 DC to fly to Australia or Canada, you can afford some trip abroad for the family.

Additionally, while paying for a family holiday abroad is something I'd budget & pay for, not a chance in hell I'd be paying for my teen DC to have a holiday alone.

Either they reach a point (like your 18 yo) where they can afford this themselves & have the necessary maturity to undertake it, or they are still part of the family holiday.

The idea that your 16 yo can head off so far away in the care of your 18 yo is baffling to me.

And if you don't have money to spare, why would you be spending money on this? (I & my DC have not had a holiday abroad ever either, single parent, and can only manage a holiday at home as we have the use of a holiday home in the wider family that we don't have to pay for).

EarringsandLipstick · 02/11/2023 07:47

Legally it’s fine. My 16 year old (lower 6th) and a friend went to Barcelona for a language course last summer so lightly supervised but not really but school were there of issues which there weren’t - but both sensible and v experienced travellers.

That's very different. I'd happily allow my 16 yo to go away under those conditions too.

Lightly supervised or not, they were under the care (and insurance) of the language school, and there was a clear educational purpose to their trip. (Meaning there was a focus / structure to the trip which is missing in OP's plan).