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Original poster

Do people stare at you when you’re on holiday?

73 replies

Escallop · 02/08/2023 17:09

I’ve got a mop of thick red hair. My DP has natural blond hair. We’re both very very pale and green/blue eyed.

When we’ve travelled to areas of the world where this colouring is not very prevalent, we’ve always noticed people staring at us. Now this could be because we are not locals, but I can’t help but think it’s because of how we look. So I was wondering, do people stare at you when you’re on holiday?

By the way, I’m talking about just going about daily life, like being in the supermarket or getting a bus. Even if there are other tourists, we seem to be watched by others more than others. Maybe I’m just making it all up in my head!

OP posts:
UsingChangeofName · 02/08/2023 17:15

I think it depends where you are.
General touristy areas, not so much, but areas where you don't get many people who look like you, then yes, it happens, if you look very different from the way the local people look.

Topseyt123 · 02/08/2023 17:15

They might, but I don't pay it much attention and don't notice it.

HappiDaze · 02/08/2023 17:17

No doubt they're staring at you because you look different to what they're used to

It's human nature

HeidioftheAlps · 02/08/2023 17:20

Funnily enough when I was in somerset I did notice a couple of people staring at me. I never get stared at in South London. I don't think I stand out in appearance in Somerset.

Rocknrollstar · 02/08/2023 17:20

When we went to China my husband - 6 ft, large, white beard - got stared at a lot and people would ask to take his photograph with their children/ teenagers standing next to him. I am quite dark and years ago, before this was such a multi-ethnic society, I would often be asked by complete strangers if I was Greek/ Spanish or even Argentinian.

Fidgety31 · 02/08/2023 17:22

Yes I have long red hair and pale skin and do catch people looking at me - not sure if In horror or in awe !

Twillow · 02/08/2023 17:22

No but I'm not very distinctive looking! Our mixed race children often drew - positive - attention for their looks when we travelled to more exotic places though. I'd treat it as a compliment!

Gherkingreen · 02/08/2023 17:24

Only when I visited Japan 20 years ago. I'm Caucasian and nearly 6ft with curly hair, so stood out very much. People were lovely, but the attention was a lot.

onlynotafan · 02/08/2023 17:28

Yea sort of. I'm brown skinned and when I went to Italy many years ago always got stared at but not as much as I expected tbh.

It's worse in some parts of England, they think anyone who doesn't look 'English' whatever that is - is foreign. And proceed to stare and make one feel uncomfortable

I'm from London born and raised btw.

TorroFerney · 02/08/2023 17:33

Oh yes. China (not me) there was an American woman in the lift who’d had a very obvious facelift. Chinese people in the lift could not take their eyes off her.

i was walking with my husband I think in penang Malaysia, turned round and he wasn’t there as he was having his photo taken with a group of people , they were all quite short with small facial features he’s tall with a distinguished nose.

a couple of nice Thai ladies have a photo with my daughter - she’s really pale and they took to her.

HundredMilesAnHour · 02/08/2023 17:35

Yes, I'm tall and blonde and lived in China for a few years. I was frequently pestered for photos (or people took photos of me more sneakily) and stared at and at times it became very wearing. There was a flight once to Thailand where it felt like I had my photo taken with most of the passengers one or two at a time. You wouldn't believe it was the 21st century to be frank but I'm aware that some of the people I met hadn't travelled much / outside of their home villages in China as a tall blonde woman was still considered an oddity.

VesperLind · 02/08/2023 17:37

Rocknrollstar · 02/08/2023 17:20

When we went to China my husband - 6 ft, large, white beard - got stared at a lot and people would ask to take his photograph with their children/ teenagers standing next to him. I am quite dark and years ago, before this was such a multi-ethnic society, I would often be asked by complete strangers if I was Greek/ Spanish or even Argentinian.

DS2 is a redhead, pale skin, pale ice blue eyes, big orange beard. Said it took him hours to make his way along the Bund in Shanghai because people constantly stopped him to ask for selfies. He didn’t buy a single drink or pay for a meal while there because locals wanted him to sit at their table. He was quite the curiosity 🤣.

Wakandian · 02/08/2023 18:39

Yes, it happens to us brown skinned people.
I’m born and raised in London, but notice more staring within less multicultural areas outside of London. Years ago, three family members and I entered a pub to get something to eat just within the M25 borders of London, and a good fraction of the punters stopped talking, turned around and stared as we walked in. It was so surreal and like those old western movies! We didn’t stay.

It happens when we go abroad. Most of the time you can tell some people are just inquisitive and then they get on with whatever they were doing. We sometimes receive stares along with smiles, other times you can feel the animosity.

I’d expect to be asked to pose with random strangers for photos in say China or Japan (as I know people who have had this experience), but my adult DD and I were taken by surprise and slightly offended when we were walking along the beach just outside our hotel in the Canaries last year also with younger DC in tow, and a woman and man who had just walked past us, stopped and doubled backed to us to ask us to let them take photos of us. It took eldest DD and I five seconds for us to realise what they were actually asking. We shook our heads whilst our facial expressions changed to a ‘Hell No!’ and we continued to walk in the opposite direction. They didn’t even attempt to speak to us. They just used their hands to beckon us over and then one of them then got their phone out. I initially thought that they were going to ask for directions!

Elsiebear90 · 02/08/2023 19:23

I’ve travelled a fair bit and the only place I’ve ever noticed people blatantly staring was Japan. People used to change seats on the train just to sit opposite us and stare and clearly talk about us, I would catch them doing it and look them right in the eye and most didn’t even seem embarrassed. I’m not particularly striking looking, I blend in very much in the UK and western world, pale skin, medium brown hair, blue eyes, 5ft 7, but it was like they’d never seen white people before, which is odd considering it was Tokyo.

After a while I just got used to it, but at first it was quite uncomfortable.

onlynotafan · 02/08/2023 19:24

Wakandian · 02/08/2023 18:39

Yes, it happens to us brown skinned people.
I’m born and raised in London, but notice more staring within less multicultural areas outside of London. Years ago, three family members and I entered a pub to get something to eat just within the M25 borders of London, and a good fraction of the punters stopped talking, turned around and stared as we walked in. It was so surreal and like those old western movies! We didn’t stay.

It happens when we go abroad. Most of the time you can tell some people are just inquisitive and then they get on with whatever they were doing. We sometimes receive stares along with smiles, other times you can feel the animosity.

I’d expect to be asked to pose with random strangers for photos in say China or Japan (as I know people who have had this experience), but my adult DD and I were taken by surprise and slightly offended when we were walking along the beach just outside our hotel in the Canaries last year also with younger DC in tow, and a woman and man who had just walked past us, stopped and doubled backed to us to ask us to let them take photos of us. It took eldest DD and I five seconds for us to realise what they were actually asking. We shook our heads whilst our facial expressions changed to a ‘Hell No!’ and we continued to walk in the opposite direction. They didn’t even attempt to speak to us. They just used their hands to beckon us over and then one of them then got their phone out. I initially thought that they were going to ask for directions!

I went to a university in a very small English town which is 1 hour away from London via train very white with few ethnic minority students. I've never felt so unwelcome in all my life! Glad to say I've not been back since I graduated. Good riddens!

HedgesNotFences · 02/08/2023 19:25

Yes because I am tall.

Echobelly · 02/08/2023 19:33

Not happened to me but a friend of mine travelled a lot in SE Asia years ago and he was a tall, heavy-set guy with red hair and one ear full of earrings, he said people just gawped at him in Vietnam and Cambodia, where he was about twice the size of the average person, and wanted photos with him!

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 02/08/2023 19:38

I think people's eyes are drawn to what is unusual for them, so a natural redhead would be non-existent in the local population of lots of places and even places with plenty of tourists would have a low percentage of red heads. Sometimes people don't even know they are doing it, they are just processing unusual information.

I'm white and got stared at a lot when we went to DH's ancestral village in India, it was less noticeable in the cities but the village itself has nothing that would draw tourists so I really stood out there.

CatsOnTheChair · 02/08/2023 19:45

Yep.
Not in Europe, but further afield.
I've also been assumed not to be my kids parent. Still got memories of the face on the waiter when he realised I wasn't the nanny, but was Mum.

TR888 · 02/08/2023 19:47

I went to India years ago with a 6'6' man with really pale blonde hair and blue eyes. A queue of kids (and some adults!) would always form wherever we went. I was unfortunately "ugly" by local standards as I was taller than most local men, wore glasses and had v short hair (at the time). I certainly knew about it!

crackofdoom · 02/08/2023 19:50

XP had long red hair and a beard when we went to Morocco. He used to get called "Jimi Hendrix" all the time in the souk, which I thought was a trifle unobservant.

karmakameleon · 02/08/2023 20:04

I’m brown and DH is white so we get stared at all the time. But my absolute favourite was when we took DS1 (3) and DS2 (1) to china while I was heavily pregnant with DS3. Everyone stared everywhere we went.

But when we went to see pandas at a breeding centre we we actually became part of the attraction with a trail of tourists queuing to take our picture! There was a baby panda that everyone was queuing to see. After we queued and the boys had seen the baby panda I took them the side and sat them on a bench while we waited for DH. Literally every Chinese tourist worked their way to the front of the baby panda queue, took a photo, and then joined the baby human queue (us!!) and took a photo of us sat in our bench. It was quite something.

Wakandian · 02/08/2023 20:07

crackofdoom’s post just reminded me of a Asda staff member in our London store smiling at my DS in the buggy and calling him Michael Jackson several years ago. It must’ve been DS’ afro lol. I was a bit 😶 at the time, but can laugh at it now.

The same Asda staff member and I recently bonded due to my surname and he revelled in sharing the roots of my unusual Asian surname.

smilesup · 02/08/2023 20:10

Not me but I've been away lots with my black friend and been stared at in the Lake District, Yorkshire, Cornwall, Italy and Romania.

AnneElliott · 02/08/2023 20:27

Lots of people in Hong along wanted to take a photo with my hair! It was waist length then and blonde and some people actually draped it round their own shoulders for the photo!

I lasted a day before I bought a baseball cap and tied it up under there.