How to get through the summer holidays.

[Mysteriousgirl2]

We’ve got 3DC. They are 7, 5 and 2.

I’m a teacher and all the holiday childcare falls to me. Of course I love having time with my own children and there will be fantastic days out I’m sure. I do understand that I’m in the very lucky position to not have to pay and sort out childcare to cover work over the summer holidays like so many do.

However, the other reality is that my house will get trashed a lot and that by the end of each day I will be at my wits end. (Middle child is autistic and quite difficult too)

We have no family help, no grandparents and my husband will be working the whole time, but will be around some of the weekends.

How on earth am I going to stay sane over the 6-7 weeks??

I could have written this myself...
I am in the same position as you, teacher so all childcare during holidays falls to me. It is really difficult and as everyone else feels they have to juggle lots of childcare and pay for holiday clubs, people don't quite understand!

It is intense to be with your children for that amount of time, entertaining them and feeding them constantly!

Every year I think I should sit down with a calendar and plan trips each day, different parks/ bike rides/beach trip etc to try and take some of the thinking work out of it.

I plan to meet other mums at the park throughout the holiday and swap some kids for play dates (which obviously means gaining a child on a different day!) but it mixes it up a bit.

This year is extra stressful for me as I am at the end of my maternity leave and financially things are very tight!

Look up free events near to you. For example, near us there are usually fun activities at the nature/wetlands centre which are either free or just a couple of pounds.
Local museums often have things on.
Do your children enjoy walks? Could you do something like geocaching?
Maybe try to have a rough plan for each week, so that it is less stressful thinking of things to do.

Plan some days out free/more costly spread out. Also I’d book the older two into holiday clubs for a day here and there to give you some respite with just the little one.

I’m feeling the same, very anxious about the holidays coming up, and I only have 2 children! SAHM but eldest is finishing reception year so I haven’t had my 3 and 5 year old full time for this long since last summer. High needs, very demanding 5 year old who won’t spend a minute on her own and very toddler-like 3-year old with speech delay. Agh my patience is always SO frayed by the end of each day, I just become a stressy mum that I don’t want to be.

Also a teacher mum. Also with one asd dc.

Overplanning doesn't work for us but making sure we have a mix of activities and down days at home helps.

Make a summer "boot bag" for the car with all the stuff you need for a nice day out at park/beach and leave it there. Makes it easier to have impromptu days out stress free.

I print off the month to a page online calendars for July/August and then fill it in with my older one who thinks it’s quite a fun activity 😂 we put in things like play dates with friends, days out once we have them planned and even silly little things like “baking day” or “picnic in the park” or “movie afternoon”. It just helps me visually to have a plan. I’m not a teacher but I work in schools and my work massively drops over summer so I am only working a handful of days - I have mine doing a few days of camp so I can work, but very few. I have asked my husband to take annual leave to have them 2-3 days and I’m just taking those days for myself to recharge. I will need them! It’s hard work, I’m not looking forward!

Mine are a bit older now, but depending on how verbal the 2 year old is, I'd ask them each to name 3 things they want to do over the holidays. Some will overlap, but that should give you one thing to do each week.
If you can supplement that with one thing you think they should do each week, and a chores day each week, you are half way there.
Mine love to vacuum (weird kids!) so I get them to do that once a week. And we cook, strip beds -kids helping etc all together. They also help tidy at the end of each day. tbf we have always done this - ever since the oldest had a grasp reflex - so it might be harder to implement now, but worth a try.
We never, ever, spend more than 2 days without going out and doing something.

If you've got a local library, the reading challange is well worth doing.

Hire in help eg student few hours extra pair of hands
Apply for direct payments for autistic child to spend on extra help , if too late this year donit for next time
Use holiday camps few days a week

Really helps to have one big planner just for the summer holidays - I just write out a list of the days on an A2 sheet.

Then mark in anything you have planned, and some PJ days (we have an autistic 6 year old, so we alternate days with activities/social plans with days where we just lounge about at home).

Makes it much easier to see the gaps and start filling them in.

I also do a lucky dip for activities - we started it in lockdown so I have lots of lollipop sticks and painted the ends different colours (yellow for good weather days, blue for rainy days, green for museums/libraries, red for emergency-mums-losing-her-mind days). They all have appropriate activities written on so the kids take turns to pick a stick of the right colour and then we do whatever it is. Saves me having to think of the activity in the moment.

We had days and days of doing nothing! Pottering about etc.

We also did days out with groups of friends to local parks etc as well as 1:1 days.

We had a family camping holiday for a week and some craft days.

The holidays flew by.

Can you afford some childcare? I'd be using some if you can.

You can sometimes find summer camps that are very reasonably priced. That could work for your eldest.

Is there any chance your youngest could go to their normal childcare for some of the holidays?

Otherwise, have a plan is my advice. Prep as much as possible in advance. Get out for at least a few hours every day. Try and engineer in some downtime for everyone (a movie/screen time after lunch works well and breaks the day in half). Try and arrange some playdates so you can have some adult company too.

Make a schedule for simple activities every day.
Packed lunch everyday.
Get out late afternoon and back in time for tea /bath /bed...
Make time for you every night..

I've two autistic kids,no support and their dad couldn't book any time off work due to colleagues sickness 😩.
It's good in one way because I can slow the pace down a little but the constant need for my help and attention is going to be draining.
Let's pray for good weather so lots of pool days and outdoors in the fresh air.

My 5yo is using some holiday camps this summer - not for childcare as I'm a sahm, but a chance to hang out with other kids, and do more activities that we can't fit in as after school/weekend clubs. We have a "musical in a week" camp, forest school and daily swimming.

Not so fun but I've scheduled dentist and optician appointments over the holidays so it will fit in annually during the summer break and not during term.

Loads of free activities put on in museums and other attractions, free festivals in parks, and generally going to big parks/NT type places. Some kids theatre shows and concerts.

I love the lolly stick idea.