Holiday idea for 87 year old with dementia?

[GeoffNorcottfan]

Just that really. I'd love to take my Dad away for a break. He can't fly, so it would have to be somewhere we can drive him to. I'm thinking somewhere nice where the hotel/hired house is enough in itself. Nice view, possibly overlooking a lake or river, hills or mountains. No need to bother with day trips, just somewhere nice we can all sit together and relax. Any recommendations? Until a year or so ago he was an avid solo traveller... Africa, America, Europe... but his dementia came on fast and has left him very dependent on others. I just want to take him somewhere he could enjoy just being.

Another gentle warning about holidaying with a relative who has dementia.
We took my Mum away a couple of times when her dementia was moderate. Once for just for a few days and another time for a week (Dad really wanted to go) but it really put her in a spin. She didn't want to leave our accommodation but even that confused her as things weren't where they were supposed to be. I can't say she enjoyed herself, she seemed on edge and she had a big fall which didn't help.

Stick to short trips to places your Dad knows well

He may not enjoy this at all- can't you relax and sit with h anyway wherever he is now?

I came to say the same.
While the idea is lovely the reality may be difficult for all parties to cope with.
Perhaps you could have a ‘holiday from home’ and spend some extra time together?

I think somewhere either by the sea, lake or trees. A place very out in nature. What a lovely daughter you are, I hope you both have a wonderful time

I think this is about trying to take the person out of their dementia.

This is not possible.

What is needed is to be with the person who has dementia. I think shorter, but regular, visits can work well, because this creates a structure. 'X is here so it must be Tuesday.'

This can involve talking about the past - longterm memory may be good - eating favourite food, watching old films. With my father in law we did crosswords.

I was thinking this. My mother was completely disorientated outside her home.

This is so true.
It isn't possible to take a dementia patient out of their dementia.

Be with them as they are, not how they used to be.

Agree with all of the above about needing things the same. My mum with dementia thought I was a carer on Tuesdays and her daughter on Fridays because we went out in different cars.

My mum has relatively early stage dementia. She came to us for a couple of days at Christmas and was very confused. When I popped out she asked DH if I'd gone home. We lived here for 22 years and she's visited frequently. I'd stick to day trips and even then to familiar places.