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Original poster

Toddler safety in a villa with a pool

50 replies

Hopingforbetterluck · 21/04/2022 15:13

Am I mad to have booked a private villa with a pool for myself, my husband and our two year old. I’m really starting to worry about pool safety. I’ve done many of these kind of holidays with my sisters kids when they were little and so I didn’t think much of it when I booked one for this year. Unfortunately we’ve had a bit of a tough time recently and it’s made me a bit of an over anxious and protective parent to my two year old. I worry myself sick over anything happening to him and now our holiday gets closer I’m starting to think I’ll be a nervous wreck around the villa and the pool. Obviously I’ll have him with me at all times and he’ll have armbands/floats on etc but even at home I’m paranoid about locking all windows and doors so he’s safe and I can imagine how much worse I’ll feel knowing there’s a pool outside. I guess I’m just looking for a bit of reassurance from anyone who has gone on a villa holiday with a toddler that it won’t be as stressful as I’m imagining.

OP posts:

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 21/04/2022 17:02

Is it just you and the toddler going? Will there be another adult with responsibility for the child?

DH and I would both be equally safety conscious about this and would make sure the door was always shut and locked and one of us was with DD2 at all times.

When I was young, my parents were with me by the pool and I was out of it to dry off. As soon as my mum took off my safety vest, I ran and jumped into the pool, claiming I could swim. Luckily, my dad and older sister were in the pool so I was fished out immediately but it happened in seconds. It was for that reason that I was never left unattended anywhere near the pool.

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 17:03

I found hotel rooms without balconies to be the safest. It doesn't take long to baby proof the plugs and check out the furniture can't fall on them or TVS etc, mini bar can be emptied before you arrive and glasses moved to a different place and you can usually chain the door to ensure no escapes. You can then at least relax whilst you are there, and know they are safe.

With a villa I found the space to vast to really check everything, and I didn't like not being able to see our toddlers if they wandered off, because I couldn't be sure it was entirely safe. They sometimes have very slippery floors, odd steps and are not toddler friendly. There was so much more furniture that can topple on them and it was just impossible to relax at any time inside or outside.

SiobhanSharpe · 21/04/2022 17:03

We took DS on a villa-with-pool holiday when he was three. He could swim very well by then but obviously we were still very careful with the pool. He loved the pool so much we went on similar holidays for the next 12 years or so!
I'd start swimming lessons ASAP for a two year old, but still be hyper vigilant around the water. Much as you would with a beach holiday, really.

Original poster

Hopingforbetterluck · 21/04/2022 17:07

I appreciate all your responses, thank you. It’s Portugal we’ve booked and there’s no fence round the pool. I will check if there’s a pool alarm. As people have mentioned we were just planning on keeping all doors locked when inside and obviously being very strict about safety when out round the pool.
My thoughts when I booked it were that I would be able to keep a better eye on him and always have him in reach around our own pool rather than trying to dart around after him in a very large busy pool with loads of other children as he’s a very active little boy and rarely stays still!
like I say I’ve done many villa holidays with my sisters children when all three of them were under 4 and even with the way I’ve been recently with my anxiety, it just didn’t occur to me that I’d start to feel this worried about it as the holiday approached.
I may see if it’s possible to move villas to one with a pool fence.
To be fair I think no matter where we are I’d find something to worry about. The thought of a balcony in a hotel or apartment fills me with dread too.

OP posts:

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 17:14

Also to say we arrived at a hotel room - with a pool that said it had a pool alarm, but it didn't actually work! Be careful with those too. I was furious actually, as this is such a dangerous thing to leave unfixed and we moved hotels in the end.

Clymene · 21/04/2022 17:17

I have done it with a smaller child but it's a bit stressful. Like a pp said, don't rely on friends to watch him. If it's just you and your husband, draw up a rota so that one of you is always on toddler watch and the other one gets some downtime.

And I would get him a swim float vest which you put on every morning over his UV suit. Kids can't get them off and they're much better than armbands. Then you can relax to a degree.

WhatNowwwww · 21/04/2022 20:42

I found it very stressful with a 1 year old and was counting down the days until we went home. We had 3 adults to watch him but there was also stairs with no stair gate and tiles floors everywhere. In hindsight it was totally unsuitable.

Midlifemusings · 21/04/2022 20:47

You can also bring some safety devices with you. There are the wrist bands the kids wear that sound an alarm if they get wet and then have a lifejacket on him whenever you are outside. I wouldn't use arm bands or floats. They keep kids from using their arms to paddle normally and really do little for safety.

Original poster

Hopingforbetterluck · 21/04/2022 20:58

@Midlifemusings thanks I’ve bought him a life jacket. I’ll have a look into the wristbands. Do you have any experience of them and are they worth it? I know they’re a bit pricey but obviously it’s worth the money if they work well.

OP posts:

AiryFairy1 · 21/04/2022 21:06

After our 16mo fell in a pool, for extra peace of mind, we got both toddlers Safety Turtle wristbands for while they weren’t in the pool - if they get wet they trigger an alarm on the base unit that’s plugged in.

We obviously still kept hawk eyes on them but the wristbands worked really well (when we tested them, the kids didn’t fall in again!)

Original poster

Hopingforbetterluck · 21/04/2022 21:11

@Clymene we have friends coming out for a long weekend, although we’ll be there for two weeks. I wouldn’t rely on them to watch him as I just don’t trust that anyone would watch him as closely as me so it would just be me and my husband with that responsibility. I’ve had a talk with him tonight about how worried I am and how upset I’ve been today about the whole thing and he assures me he’ll take pool safety as seriously as me and keep all the doors locked etc. I’ve ordered a like jacket as suggested

OP posts:

MumUndone · 21/04/2022 21:13

Surely any holiday that involves a pool or the sea requires you to keep a constant eye on a 2 year old, so I don't see why a villa is any different really.

SnowingInApril · 21/04/2022 21:20

It would have to be fenced off for me to be comfortable with that.

user1506328491 · 21/04/2022 21:30

A 2 YO needs constant supervision anyway so you will be able to manage the pool- I wouldn't rebook. As you say, you'd find something else to stress about if it's not the pool (I say that with empathy - kids and unfamiliar settings are a worry.)

orangina01 · 21/04/2022 21:59

I'd rebook. We always went for pools with fences for this reason. It takes seconds for a child to get into trouble near water and it would mean you had to be aware constantly.

Doveyouknow · 21/04/2022 22:10

We have done plenty of holidays with toddler and pools. Most holiday cottages aren't toddler proofed so you have to watch them carefully in any case. Just make sure you are careful about doors being locked so they can't access the pool.

G5000 · 21/04/2022 22:23

when mine were that age, I would only book villas with secured pools. There are plenty of those available. I would re-book.

TizerorFizz · 21/04/2022 22:29

@RandomQuest
We had the most awful experience in France. We took our urn car and I remember getting DD aged 2 out of the car seat. I simply put her on the drive of the Villa and she set off across the lawn and jumped in the pool. It had a cover in but it was not fitted. She went down between the side of the pool and the cover. My DH sprinted after her and as her head bobbed up he scooped her out. I am going cold thinking about it now and she’s nearly 30!

So no unfenced pools for us after that until they were older and could swim. Arm bands might have meant she got stuck under the cover. I think the only way out of it is to keep doors closed and have eyes in the back of your head. You won’t relax unless they are asleep.

ThisSeemsSilly · 21/04/2022 22:35

The fact that you booked a villa with an unfenced pool in the first place tells me you have no idea of the dangers. Maybe it’s because I’m in Australia and any accommodation that had an unfenced pool would be closed and fined out of existence.

This is absolute madness. You cannot keep a toddler safe around an unfenced pool. No-one can. It’s a 24 hour never out of your sight job and a chain of mistakes will happen.

Mia85 · 21/04/2022 22:35

A good friend of mine tragically lost her toddler DD through drowning. They were constantly vigilant but however careful you are, a moment of distraction or a mistake in locking a door can be all it takes. It really only takes seconds for a child to drown and even if you notice the child is missing immediately you might not spot them in those seconds. I don't want to post my friend’s story but there are lots of similar ones where parents have taken care and done everything that any responsible parent would but there is a tragic result. Of course in most cases everything is fine but in too many there is tragedy. I wouldn’t take a young child to a villa with an unfenced pool having seen what happened to my (very responsible) friend.

Robinni · 22/04/2022 00:34

Rebook if you feel really anxious, but I think as long as you have a system you should be ok.

We have a DS(6), very much quicker and prone to wandering. We are handling this by having him in the same bedroom as me, hiding keys etc so he cannot “escape” in the night! Loves the water too much…

Other than that, sensible precautions such as ensuring patio doors are locked and somebody is always on duty.

Robinni · 22/04/2022 00:36

Might I add we are not in a villa, but an apartment and there are several pools within walking distance… it doesn’t have to be a villa to require vigilance.

MrsTerryPratchett · 22/04/2022 03:28

@ThisSeemsSilly

This is absolute madness. You cannot keep a toddler safe around an unfenced pool. No-one can. It’s a 24 hour never out of your sight job and a chain of mistakes will happen.

I agree. Drowning is swift and silent.

People saying 'you watch them all the time anyway' are lying. If mine was in a fenced garden or paying with sand, I'd read a book. I'd be there but head down. With a pool its eyes on all the time.

And statistically, more dangerous than a gun in the house. Would you voluntarily stay in a holiday home with a gun? I wouldn't.

Drowning is generally the leading cause of child death in places with pools.

Wannabegreenfingers · 22/04/2022 04:43

Holidayed many times in villas with pools since my oldest was 10 months. If in the house keep the door locked, if by the pool they are supervised. Some had pool fences. Same rules applied.

Enjoy your holiday.

Swayingpalmtrees · 22/04/2022 15:36

Op, to me it is even worse you have friends coming.

This is going to be a huge distraction by itself, and they are liable to forget about locking doors (its easily done when you are away and relaxed) and I assuming you will want time to talk to them.

I am sorry but a toddler life jacket is not enough - I bought one that had a special zip and lock so it could not be taken off, my dd still wriggled out of it, and hated the thing, she was so hot wearing it for hours and she had terrible heat rashes. I tried everything to get her to wear it, but she is and was very slim and managed to get it off each time. Ditto anything around her wrists. I think you are underestimating the battles with toddlers for them to accept anything on them like this in the heat, and their determination to take things off. I couldn't even get dd to wear pants at that age - which was cute but not ideal in every situation.

I would rebook, without hesitation and choose something completely safe and secure for your child. No one can stay on guard 247 for the entire holiday and even if you do what kind of holiday is it going to be? I would never risk it again with my small children. I had an experience of a child drowning over seas and still have nightmares about the mother's screams 25 years later. And the small shoes by the front door.

Don't do it.

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