Sri Lanka holiday - your opinion

[Lady86]

My husband and I were due to travel to Sri Lanka at end of July as my husband has Sri Lankan family there. As my husbands sister is on her own we had allowed her to join us on the first week of our holiday when we had booked a hotel on the coast and then we were supposed to see the family (along with my husbands brothers family who fly out for the second week) in Colombo. The holiday is really important to my husband as an opportunity to build bridges with the family as he hasn't seen them for ten years. The rest of the family have booked non-refundable plane tickets except for us. My husband says that if I don't go, he will have pressure on him to go without me from his brother and rest of the family, or at least pay for the sisters plane ticket as she can't travel on her own and didn't want to pay out for a refundable ticket as we had done. The problem is that I was already reticent to go with the risk of dengue, such a young child (10 months old) etc but now with the terrorist situation I really don't want to risk going. Am I reasonable to refuse to go and if so do you think it's right tthat we have to pay for his sisters unused flight? Is it unreasonable for the family to still expect my husband to go if I cancel- this would mean all of his leave and holiday fund used up when we could have otherwise still had a little holiday as a family unit elsewhere as both mine and my husbands accommodation and flights are refundable? Thoughts please!!

The Govt advice is don’t go. So don’t go! Flights might be cancelled anyway. Also did no one take out insurance? You are not responsible for the decisions of his family. Your husband has to stand up for what is right for your family, and him, in the current circumstances. The most sensible thing to do is go when the Govt advice says it’s safe to do so.

You are not unreasonable in now refusing to go. The Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) advise against all but essential travel to Sri Lanka, due to the current evolving security situation following attacks on 21 April 2019.

Its too bad for the rest of his family but you had the foresight to buy flexible tickets whilst his sister did not. You are under no obligation whatsoever to pay for his sister's ticket and she needs to contact the airline in question re their refund policies.

He should stand up for his own self against any and all future emotional manipulation being heaped on him. You are under no obligation to travel there with your son either.

And yes, have a family holiday with DH and DC in a safe place. I’m so sorry about what has happened in Sri Lanka but it’s not considered safe right now.

Very sad for you op, but I would go by the FO advice and stay home at present. Simply not worth the risk.
On top of the absolute tragic events of Easter Sunday , I feel so sorry for Sri Lankans with their tourist industry being deliberately destroyed.

You may well find your insurance is entirely invalidated if you travel somewhere the FCO has advised against. i.e. even if you go and get ill from food poisoning or in a car accident, they won't pay to fly you home etc, because your whole insurance is invalidated. You need to call them and get their response in writing if they say you can travel (they probably won't as they usually follow FCO advice).

The FCO doesn't advise against travel without good reason, and even if you have a minor problem like passport loss over there, the consular folk will be tied up with supporting the victims and relatives from the previous attacks. More attacks may occur, don't add to the general chaos by going out there.

"all but essential travel" is open to interpretation, but I'd say if you were going to say goodbye to a dying relative than you might consider that essential, a holiday - no.

I feel so sorry for Sri Lankans with their tourist industry being deliberately destroyed.

This. Everything was picking up there after the civil war ended and now a few want to ruin everything. It’s such a beautiful country and I hope and pray there are no more attacks there.

Why can't the sister travel on her own? SHe could easily cancel the hotel accommodation and go to see family for the first week as well.

It isn't safe for a young woman on her own to travel in Sri Lanka. The Sri Lankan/ Asian culture seems to dictate that as a single woman (parents no longer alive) the brothers must step up to protect her. The trouble is she is likely to still be happy to go to Sri Lanka and as its me who is effectively putting a stop to that there is pressure for either my husband to go and have he holiday as planned with myself and our daughter staying at home, or to reimburse her for her flight. There is added pressure to reimburse as a minimum as part of he reason she didn't buy the refundable ticket herself is that it was more expensive and she isn't well paid. We are usually in a situation where we are better placed to help her out financially but I'm currently on unpaid maternity leave so I feel our financial priorities are different currently. We warned her the minute we heard of the bombings (before the fco issued their warning) that if she hadn't already got travel insurance she needed to buy it that day!

I would ask your SIL to check with her airline. As the FO has issued a travel warning they may refund her the ticket despite it would normally not refundable. Her travel insurance may now be invalid due to the FO warning or it may be usable to get the flight price back.

While I do understand the issue with family aboard (despite ours living in Europe I haven't seen my mum in a year now) I would not go. Could you arrange a meeting somewhere else instead of all going to Sri Lanka?