Is family life better in or out of London?

[curiouscat]

Has anyone moved out of London to give the kids more space? Is it boring and lonely? Do you have to drive to get a pint of milk? Or is it all fresh air and glowing cheeks? What do you do for company? If we move dh might stay a night or two in London weekly, this isn't my idea of a good marriage situation. We endlessly toy with the idea and am curious how anyone found it, positive or negative.

obviously it depends on your attitude as to how you get received (that's the basic rule of social interaction isn't it?!) but well established village toddler groups where people have all grown up together or have a great deal of shared history can be a nightmare to crack however happy, positive and friendly you are, or however many delicious cakes you bring to events.

There's no way I would move back to London, I love all we have here, but its important to make any move like this with your eyes totally open to the fact it won't be all The Archers and friendly village fetes..

you know, everyone here rightly defends the life choices they make for themselves and thier families. we all different, good to have different views or the world would be a boring place. and londons full isnt it? so i hear?

tbh toddler groups can be a bugger to crack anyway. i have 'returned' (prodigal stylee)to the village where i grew up and some of those who run groups are a little er, unwelcoming. and judgemental. and just a bit odd. some are lovely though and generally i dont give a stuff.

You get clicquey elements "in London" as well. Just find new places to frequent until you find people on your own wavelength. Having said that... I'm half considering relocating next year but the thing that worries me slightly is the accents. I'm worried that I'll stick out like a sore thumb (thinking of moving to Cheshire) since whenever I'm up there my accent seems to go a bit Gor Blimey (which it's not really - 'onest Guv!). I'd hate to lose my original accent entirely. .

Agreed. But when you have seen how mean old established village mummies can be to newcomers, you realise that that theory can work both ways.

speccy, that's one view. I sincerely hope my concerns don't show in RL - that's why it's good to let off steam on here! I'm very careful how I come across and try to be positive and friendly myslef. Not perfect though and it's been a huge adjustment for our family so still have my off days(when I come and moan on here!)

I'd imagine not being one of the townies who move to the countryside then object to cows mooing, cockerels crowing and geese.... being noisy plus a toleration of tractors in small lanes would endear you more to the local population.

Not saying anyone on her would be so insensitive of course .

RTTH - where do you live? Shall we start a toddler group in my kitchen?

Why not move out but not too far out?

We're near Marlow and Henley, in a village in spectacular countryside.
Yes, we do have to go a mile to the nearest shop, but you get used to that.

Nearest station is 15 mins away, fast train to Marylebone 35 mins.

We have tons of friends in the village, this month have two boozy lunches in mates' gardens, there's a garden party with hog roast in a couple of weeks, there are always loads of events and most people are ex londoners, not bumpkins (I class myself as a bumpkin, by the way, don't really like London much).

I love all that,and I lve the fact that my dcs are being brought up in that envrionment, beats pollution and traffic jams any day!

moodle, you'll have to promise not to be cliquey then!

how cna you say one way or the toher??

we had some friends stay (from London) who were horrified that we couldnt get pizza delivered. And we had baby owls in the garden in a tree and they didnt want to come outside to look at them coz they were watching TV. now to me this is a bit sad.

oh and agree with mumble, there's such a choice - out but nr london,
in village/small town
or in middle of countryside.

And each area is so differnet in terms of links/culture/type of people etc (well, obviously I know). Just mean you can't really generalise.

RTTH - promise not to be. Nor change the venue without telling you. Will probably serve wine though?

interesting thread,I am a born and bred Londoner and always imagined I would be here for life. However in the last two years I have seriously considered leaving for a better quality of life.So I will read any further comments with interest.

Same here, donnie. I'm feeling pretty negative re London atm.

ok so if im being honest, i dont really understand why people with options choose to stay in London. If you are near family and need the support, or are not economically mobile, thats one thing. If your job or partners job is amazing and cant possible be done elsewhere, thats another. Beyond that, i dont get it. dont get me wrong, i think London is a fab and vibrant city - great to visit. But i could not live there now. too many people, too noisy and dirty. no space. yes, i know there are beautiful parks. schools full or oversubscribed or expensive or scary. im really not judging, just interested. all come and live near me! its grreat. ok well not perfect but lovely.

Oh God, well I never lived in London with kids but I lived there long enough to know that there was no way I'd live there once I had them.

It was a condition of my engagement to dh that we moved out of London

Moopy, well I would say we fall into the 'not economically mobile' category but that would apply wherever we lived tbh.

One of the real stumbling blocks for me is the 'having to start all over again' aspect. Plus potential guilt at removing dd from a school which she loves etc

i guess, mercy, that you are worried about moving rather than moving out of london. the cost of living is def. cheaper elsewhere. and children do settle in new schools. starting over somewhere new is tough, but imo worth it in the long run if there is a better quality of life - whatever that means for you and yours.