Iceland next Oct half term

[Killingthebodyguard]

We are planning to go to Iceland next Oct half term (2019) for DH's 50th birthday. DH is a very keen amateur geologist so geysers, lava caves, glaciers and volcanos are his fantasy holiday destination. DS is a nature addict so whale watching etc would be on his bucket list. I've been googling but feel a bit overwhelmed!

There'll be me, DH and DS (13). Our usual holidays are either camping in Europe, cottage in UK or city break and our usual budget is £1500 all in for the 3 of us so this is out of my comfort zone. I know I'm going to have to stretch the budget - £3000 for the 3 of us is my absolute max but nearer £2000 would be ideal. We don't live near any airports unfortunately so may need to squeeze airport hotels in UK out of that too. It has to be within school holidays as DH is a teacher as well as DS obv being at school.

My questions are:
Is Oct a good time to go - we want to have a chance of seeing Northern Lights but also want a reasonable amount of daylight for sightseeing?
Am I better booking independently or through a tour operator (and how do I do that - never been inside a travel agent in my life!)
Should I be looking for a hotel or SC (Air bnb has been mentioned but never done that so not sure how safe it is?)
Should we hire a car or do excursions? The excursions seem to be ramping the price up - are places accessible independently in a hire car? DH is a fairly confident driver abroad.
How long should we go for? I'm tight on budget but also we won't be doing this again so I'd rather squeeze an extra day or two now than feel we've missed stuff. Should we stay in Reykjavik for whole time or should we be striking out into rest of the country?
How much spending money will we need? I keep reading that food and drink is expensive and it's making me nervous!

Sorry lots of questions - you can see I'm bamboozled! Any other advice or tips gladly welcomed - this is likely to be our only 'big' holiday until my 50th in 4 years time (unless we win the lottery) and DS may not want to come with us by then so I don't want to mess it up!
Thanks

Hi, I love Iceland and have been twice. First time on honeymoon in January 2007 and then as a stop-over with DCs (2 and 5 at the time) in May 2015. I booked our tours through our airline - Icelandair - and thought they were pretty reasonable. On the first trip, we did snorkeling in the national park, close to Reykjavik, which was amazing but very pricey. We also booked the Golden Circle tour. Very interesting to do. On the second trip, we rented a car at the airport (line ups were super long so hurry from baggage claim) and did the Golden Circle tour ourselves with the DCs. DH drove and found it very manageable. We also drove down to Vik that day. Doing that drive, we got to see some really nice waterfalls. All excursions can be done in your own. There's a few travel bloggers who helped me plan our driving. We didn't get too lost while driving (it was mostly my slow navigating skills). There aren't too many roads and I had maps printed before we left.

The second time we went, we book an apartment room (Stay Apartments Einholt) - I believe it was all open plan. DCs slept on the futon/chesterfield and we had a bed for DH and I. There was no 'front desk' and I was just emailed the door code to the lobby that then allowed us to get our key in a lock box. I did this because I wanted a kitchen. I thought the food in Iceland was very expensive!!! I brought some food from home to cook (pasta) so that when we went out to eat, it wasn't too eyewatering. I also did a little shop at a grocery store there to pick up breakfast items.

We were able to walk everywhere in downtown Reykjavik; I think their main strip is about 2km and then you're close to the harbour too and they have a lovely 'sea-wall' to walk along.

Make time for the Blue Lagoon (I believe you have to reserve your spot a head of time) and the Iceland history museum by the university was really well done.

Here's the blogger that I found quite useful: iheartreykjavik.net/?cn-reloaded=1

You'll find a lot of answers if you just google them OP. The 'official' Northern Lights (NL) season is from October, but you might see them, you might not.

Sunrise / sunset? - look it up. Don't know.

Expense? Yes, very expensive, especially eating out. You won't get any change out of 100 pounds for a meal.

Definitely hire a car. Iceland is an incredibly easy and friendly place to explore. For whale watching your best bet is to go north of Reykjavik - can't remember what the city is called - look it up. Though be aware the 'best season' ends in September. And for the NL, go to the east of the country (though this is probably another flight).

Reykjavik is an amazing city. Well worth spending a few days exploring it. You wouldn't need a car for these days btw - just walk everywhere. Go to the fish and chip on the harbour front. Best in the world. Go to the amazing theatre/concert hall even if you just look at it. Do the Golden Circle tour - absolutely essential! Don't bother with the Blue Lagoon. It's man-made, very expensive and over-hyped.

It's a great place to visit, I'm sure you'll have a fab time but don't assume you will see the lights and whales - there's always a large element of luck/chance.

HappySpade thanks that's really useful. I think we are wavering towards hiring a car and doing some of the trips independently so good to hear that's do-able. I'll have a look at that blog and the apartments too. Getting excited now!
TwitterQueen I know I can google, I've been doing it all day! Think I've got information overload and lots of conflicting information so just wanted some real-life opinions. I know we can't guarantee whales or NL but would like to have a chance. Good to hear another opinion that doing trips by car is manageable though and those fish and chips sound great.

I've been in October and in terms of day light hours, it was fine. It was however very cold & windy and our UK October winter wear didn't cut it so go prepared.We did paid excursions and yes it was expensive so other than the obvious (whale watching and the like) you'd be better off hiring a car. The roads aren't exactly busy! An Icelandic friend of mine rents her house out on AirBnB and its very popular in Iceland and I wouldn't have thought you'd have problems - as the PP has said, it is very expensive to eat out in Iceland and you'd save yourself money that way as well as being able to make up lunch for trips out. We stayed in Reykjavik and it's a good base - it's not a huge city and easy to cover in a day. Take swimming caps if you're doing the Blue Lagoon, whatever it is in the water turned my hair to straw!

I'm taking DH at the end of Jan 19 for 3 nights for a big birthday. I've booked BA flights (we live near LHR) and City Comfort Apartments. I've spent £700 so far so I reckon your budget is ok. Beginning to look at day trips which seems to be approx £80 pppd, so not sure if we'll do 1 day or 2. Planning on taking some food as well.