Someone decide for me.........................

[sweetheart]

My dh and I have been asked to go to New York for a long weekend with some friends.

Initially I was very excited, we organised child care for dd for the weekend and found flights/hotel etc.

Now I am feeling very frightened. I've never been away from dd for more than 2 nights and this would be 4 nights. Also I'm really worried about the terror alerts and security levels in NY.

Plus I'm not a brilliant flyer and this being a long haul flight is a little worrying for me.

I guess my main worry is what if something happened to me and dh while we were away.

Can someone tell me what to do - am I being totally irrational (this is a once in a life time oppertunity for me and dh)
HELP!!!

You're being irrational

GO and enjoy it!!

FWIW, I've become much more scared of flying etc now I have children. I see danger everywhere.

Thanks SD

Anyone else, my head is saying go - it'll be a fantastic experience but my heart is singing a totally different tune!!!

Go go go. Try and plan in advance all the stuff you want to do while you're there, buy your dd a beautiful pressie in NY, and plan something really nice to do with her for when you get back. She'll have a lot of fun while you're away, and so will you!

Sweetheart (what a nice name), my DH and I did exactly the same thing in April of this year. We went for 4 weeks too.

I did have some similar thoughts to you before going but tried very much to put them to the back of my mind. The children had a lovely time while we were away (my sister and mum looked after them) and we enjoyed being child free for a few days.

To be honest you would have to be very unlucky for any terrorist act to happen while you were there and it is almost as likely to happen here as there. Try not to worry about this - although sometimes I think worrying is part and parcel of being a parent!

The flight is relatively short - and because you won't have children with you you can indulge in a few inflight drinks to salve your nerves.

Do go - it is a fantastic city and you will be able to purge your guilt at leaving your DD behind by shopping for things to take home for her. If you get the chance don't forget to go to the American Girl shop on 5th Avenue. Truely fascinating! We bought some lovely books there for DD which tell the stories of girls in different ages and cultures in America. She loves the Red Indian one.

Go on - do it!!!!!!

Thanks FG - the thought of doing something special with her when we get back is really nice - will definatly plan a nice trip for her.

Whoops - 4 weeks !!!! That would have been too long even for me - I meant to write 4 days!!

soapbox,

glad to hear i'm not the only one that worries. Also not the only one that leaves their children at home for such trips!!!!

I know the chances of anything happening are about a million to 1, and I'm more likely to be killed crossing the road etc etc but the worry is still there. I know I am being irrational and I know we would have a fantastic time.

Thanks for giving me a big fat wet fish of a slap round the face ladies!!!

My dh and I also went to NY this May for 4 days without dd. Since she was born we have made a point of going away for one long weekend every year without her for some us time and to recharge our batteries.
Of course we miss her but it is also quite refreshing and good for your relationship to have some time to enjoy things together without children.
NY is a fantastic city - you'll have a ball, especially since you're going with friends.

Message withdrawn

My dd would be staying with my mum for the weekend and yes... she does spoil her rotten. No worries there, she'll have a whale of a time.

Oh sweetheart, I don't know if you saw my pathetic snivelling thread this January when I was going to Tobago for a week and leaving dd with my parents. I so nearly cancelled the holiday the day before and spent most of it in tears Fortunately sensible mumsnetters sorted me out and we went and had the BEST time. It does you so much good to have a break.

I too was worried, what would happen if the plane went down and dd was left an orphan, what if she got really sick etc? But of course everything was fine.

I would say do it, but be prepared for tears etc near the time (yours!).