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Holidays

Use our Travel forum for recommendations on everything from day trips to the best family-friendly holiday destinations.

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Original poster

Do any of you take lids on holiday without dh?

24 replies

puffling · 06/02/2007 11:04

DP no longer wants to go on holiday no we have dd. He doesn't want the stress. I, however adore holidays and can't wait toms see dd playing in the sand etc.
What's it like taking children away on your own? Will I enjoy it? Where should we go?
x

OP posts:

CountessDracula · 06/02/2007 11:07

I have to say I have never taken a lid on holiday other than the ones on teh bottles of suntan lotion

How old is your dd?

twelveyeargap · 06/02/2007 11:07

Sounds a bit mean and huffy imo, but that said, DH is more than happy for me to take my 11 year old away on our own! Wants the peace I think.

Go for it. If your child needs entertaining then maybe choose a club med type thing where there will be activities. If DD is very young, then there's no reason not to suit yourself and go where you please. DH will probably be jealous in the end!

foxtrot · 06/02/2007 11:08

Yes, but i usually take the bottom half of the tupperware too...

foxtrot · 06/02/2007 11:10

Couldn't resist. Now onto more serious matters. I have taken mine, but only with grandparents to lighten the load (they are 5,4, and 3). It's fine, if i had just the one i'd do it like a shot. How about disneyland paris?

Skribble · 06/02/2007 11:11

I never wanted to take DC on med type holidays, all that worrying about sunburn and pools and food. Ask him to suggest types of holidays that he thinks he might enjoy with the kids. If he is used to club18-30 type thing and sees other peoples brats wandering about screaming and bright red he might be think no way with my kids.

It is stressful flying with kids and unfamilar places. Personaly we have done self catering in the UK with the kids. Depends on ages I suppose.

hana · 06/02/2007 11:13

really?
your dp doesn't want to have a 'holiday' with your dd?

how odd. that's part of being a family and having children I think.

but yes, go on your own, you'll have a fab time.

EnidLloydFoxe · 06/02/2007 11:13

how utterly depressing

I have done it but only because dh couldnt come not because he didnt want to

I should think I would jolly well resent every day he wanst there if it was because he 'didnt want the stress'

miserable sod

CountessDracula · 06/02/2007 11:21

what stress is he talking about?

Does he not like hanging out with your dd?

Tell him that you put a toddler on a beach with a bucket and spade and you don't have any stress just smiles!

misdee · 06/02/2007 11:23

i have taken my 3 dd's on holidays without my dh (he was in hospital for over a year) and i have to say i enjoyed it though was sad he wasnt with us to enjoy it. i think his phone didnt stop beeping with all the picture messages i sent him lol.

Marina · 06/02/2007 11:28

Puffling, have you had a holiday yet all together? Is he speaking from experience, so to speak?
I think you must make him take one family holiday before you start thinking about going away on your own. As others have said, yes it is fun, but yes, it is "stressful" in the sense that you are parents now with responsibility for a dependent.
You can have fab times on your own with your child but if your dd is a baby/toddler, I think I would prefer the extra adult around for company and back-up.
If you do decide to go on your own, YHA have lots of family-friendly hostels in beachside locations in Wales, the South Coast of England and North Norfolk. Then you have the option of being round other families, adult company in the evenings (most hostels are licenced now so you can enjoy a glass of something when dd is in bed), and usually, lovely scenery and unspoilt beaches.
YHA Poppit Sands, YHA Littlehampton and YHA Totland Bay on the Isle of Wight are all good.

Bozza · 06/02/2007 11:33

I think he is being miserable. Going on holiday with young children is hard work, not often all that relaxing, but also great fun IME. And it definitely gets easier as they get older. I am expecting great things from my two this summer - they will be 6 and 3. We won't need any baby equipment (didn't need much last summer) apart from possibly a buggy. I am undecided on that one.

Furball · 06/02/2007 11:40

i've been a few times with a friend her children. great fun. Is there anyone else you would like to go with?

Tortington · 06/02/2007 11:41

miseralble fucker

Tortington · 06/02/2007 11:41

miseralble fucker

themoon66 · 06/02/2007 11:43

I took my two on my own once because DH broke his leg the week before and the airline wouldn't take him.

We had a lovely time... as someone said earlier, you just stick kids on a beach, lather them up with factor 60 and away you go.

EnidLloydFoxe · 06/02/2007 11:52

puffling you got lots of good advice here, did you read it?

motheroftwoboys · 06/02/2007 12:10

took my two teens away on my own to Mark Warner last summer as my DH couldn't go. We had a great time. MW seem to have quite a few parents travelliing alone for one reason or another and they introduce them all to each other on the first night. I met a great group of other mums and we got on really, really well.

Original poster

puffling · 06/02/2007 13:03

Hi thanks for all your advice.
I feel too that he's being a miserable sod but from his perspective, he loves dd dearly but is struggling with the responsibility of fatherhood and thus not willing to do things that take him even further out of his 'comfort zone.' So until he starts to cope better, I'm going to have to do things like holidays on my own.
EnidLLoydFoxe I did read the thread. DP did too. He's slightly less anxious now but still finding it very hard to adjust to this change. It's a bit disconcerting to have my threads cross referenced though!
Thanks Dawnx

OP posts:

LIZS · 06/02/2007 13:13

You could go to a hotel where there is childcare (several in Cornwall for example) and perhaps your dh would feel he could have his holiday too ? Sad that he feels he can't share the experience but it doesn't ahve to be all hands on digging in the sand and limited osuhcair suitable trips everywhere if you dont; want it to be. Think you need to get to the bottom of what might stress him and address it , even if you go for just for a short trip over a weekend to start with. I'd feel odd going alone with kids (even now they are older)but some people have no choice. Do you have a friend with young kids or mum/sister who would come with you ?

Marina · 06/02/2007 13:21

Puffling, I read the link too and just wanted to send you some sympathies on the more general front. I agree with the posters who felt your dh was facing some more specific problems than just adjusting to being a parent.
Issues from childhood can radically affect even the most loving adult's abilities to get to grips with the awesome responsibility of being a parent, IME.
After reading that thread I would say go away maybe for a short break on your own, as there is nothing worse than being on a "family holiday" with a partner who is unable to cope. I have done it once and then we got dh the help he needed from his gp, and things were much better for us all
It was not a good fortnight though

Original poster

puffling · 06/02/2007 15:21

Thanks for your kind words Marina.

OP posts:

cheekychick · 06/02/2007 15:34

Yes I do all the time, not cos dh doesn't want to he works away so generally in the school holidays I will occupy myself with the boys. We've had great holidays away and with dh. I've even done the camping thing boy that was a mission I will wait for dh to come along next time.

First time I took kids away without any family was when they were 3 and 5 we stayed at an island resort where there was kid club. I also struck a deal for free babysitting for 3 hours whilst I enjoyed their day spa. So when you're booking your holiday away try and negotiate free babysitting and kids club especially if your'e going to use other parts of their facilities.

Bowbelles · 06/02/2007 15:41

My DH never wanted to come on "holiday camp" holidays with me and the 3 dc so rather than all of us miss out I would take them with my mum.
We've had some great holidays, and I think he felt that he was missing out and now even suggests us all going away.
Butlins or Haven might be good to start with (you can get 3 night weekend or 4 night midweek breaks).
Go for it

fennel · 06/02/2007 15:41

I have to say I do find holidays with small children less fun and less rewarding than everyday life at home with them. We have almost given up on bothering with holidays lately, but then we both feel that way a bit.

after all holidaying with small children is just 24 hour childcare without an environment organised to make it easy, isn't it?

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