Travel to Developing Countries and Hassle

[NotQuiteCockney]

One of the big reasons we almost never travel to developing countries is because we hate being hassled. I don't want people to pretend to be my new best friend, and then try to sell me a carpet. I don't want to make new pretend best friends at all.

I don't mind paying more than locals pay. I don't want to haggle with anyone, ever, for anything.

Our two forays into developing countries have been a day trip to Marakesh (I think it was? Coastal city, Morroco.), which involved loads and loads of nightmarish hassle, and a one-week trip to small-town Mexico, which involved nearly no hassle.

I do understand why people hassle us. If being kinda annoying to me for half an hour can earn them the equivalent of a week's wages, well, who can blame them?

But I want to understand how to choose holidays that will involve little or no hassle. Are big cities worse? Are some countries worse than others?

I have some ideas about why the Morocco trip was so much worse than the Mexican one, but I want other people's thoughts about how this works, too ...

Surely I can't be the only one with this problem ...

personally I have found that north african countries to be more hassly (sp) than everywhere else in the world - central africa, southern africa, india etc.
No idea why but just my experience...
Where are you planning to go?

sorry to be asking a racsict question, but are you white? coz if so, then you are more likely too recieve such 'hassle'

but seriously, isnt hassle part of the experience?

i think it depends a lot where you go in the country. Places really geared up for & expecting tourists & most importantly needing their money will give you that hassle. Quiet places with just locals they may "look" at you, but no worse. The 2nd largest city in Mexico is Tijuana. Downtown Tijuana (Avenida de la Revolucion) is horrible, constant hassle to gringos. You walk 2 streets away and suddenly you're in an ordinary Mexican place street market wherenobody speaks English, & nobody pesters you to buy anything or expects you to pay more than locals.

i agree with revoltingzebra. in areas that have been developed for toursism you are likely to experience this. if you step outside these areas you will be more likely to experience warmth, hospitality and maybe a littel curiosity - that is my experience anyway.

I stopped noticing after about the 10th developing nation I found myself in. I just sort of move along and don't even stop if I'm not interested. My mother is an exceptional haggler, she finds it fun. But she's weirdy like that.

I'm small and dark, so I don't really stick out anywhere. In Latin America I just say 'no' or nothing, but then I also speak the language w/a Mexican accent so people just assume I'm some local, I guess.

I'm white, and genearlly obviously not local. (There are some white people from South America etc, at least I've known some.)

If the hassle is an inevitable part of the experience, then it's an experience I'm just not going to have. The day we spent in Morocco was horrible. We were hassled by loads of different people, until we finally gave up and picked a guide, who of course took us to a carpet shop. It was mindbogglingly annoying.

(And at least partly our fault: Lonely Planet said not to do the daytrip thing. And it was Ramadan.)

Thanks to the Morocco trip, we didn't go anywhere at all poor for ages. But our recent trip to Mexico involved almost no hassle. It wasn't a very touristy area, but it has a big (resident) gringo population, so they're used to us.

Oh, and I'm considering Turkey, maybe, sometime.

I can't bear the hassle. I really want to be left alone. I found Barbados a bit much and I suspect that was nothing compared to Marrakech!
I get quite tense about it and dh and I really stick out abroad (we're so pasty).

cupcakes, I totally understand. I like Iceland. The locals ignore you. And Japan is hassle-free, too.

God, I would love to be ignored (and I would love to go to Iceland). I feel very vulnerable in foreign countries where I can't understand the language. It makes me very shy and nervous and I find it difficult to overcome. I just want to sink into the background and observe everything and I really resent it when I'm not allowed to.

Portugal was good - but then they're so used to the English. At least we could get on with things at our own pace.
I would like to travel further afield though.

Oh, we've had no problems in Canada, or anywhere we've been in Europe. I figure it's mostly a poor-country thing.

Certainly, Iceland and Japan, where everyone ignores you, or is maybe helpful, but isn't trying to get money off you, are very wealthy countries indeed.

urgh yes. I went to Egypt with my mum when I was 13 and got hassled by men all the time. It was really, really bloody awful. Waiters following me round the hotel, that kind of thing, we couldn't go to a market without me attracting men like flies. I was a complete child still, too (and had short hair, looked like a boy - god knows what the attraction was). Really gross.

Oh, it's not that sort of hassle I'm thinking of ... almost all my international travel has been with 6'4" DH, so hassle from men has been minimal, everywhere, to say the least! (Not that I'd get loads these days, I think, even without DH.)

Aren't there parts of Europe where women travelling without men get loads of male hassle? Or is it more of a developing countries thing, too?

I've not had too much hassle in developing co's, mostly people trying to guess if I'm German, Deutch or Danish? of which I am neither, although do have some deutch decendency a long time ago.....I mainly find I get most bother in Med/arab countries, due to the blonde hair/blue eye combination.......which I detest, why oh why can't a woman just go out and enjoy herself, either by herself, with dh or with the kids, without getting oggled by icky blokes

i am sooooo jealous.
havent been on holiday in years and years and years.

I had MUCHO hassle in Rome when I went w/a pal. We were both 21. It was mental! She'd been living in Berlin and I in Lyon, where I also had some hassle.

Places that are quite touristy and known for the shopping will generally have more hassle. I don't actually mind the hassle all that much and I quite liked the hustle and bustle in Marakesh, and if I actually want to buy something then I quite enjoy haggling especially the bit at the end where you pretend to walk away and they come running after you to offer a rock bottom price. If I don't want anything I say "No, thank you" and do the hand across in front of the body gesture and then avoid eye-contact and walk on. DH has more problems than me even though he often looks local (he's Indian Malaysian) as Malaysians don't say "No" as it's rude so they euphemise instead and say something like "Maybe later" which comes across as undecided and makes the seller try harder. DH is the man to have with you if you do want to buy though, he is a demon haggler even in the UK.

But to get to the point and answer your question NQC, there are some places that are very laid back but I don't think there's a formula to finding them, I think you just have to ask around. I would recommend Kerala in SW India, and most of Malaysia except Penang.

Hmm, I suspect less touristy places are less hassly. Hassling is a skill, so if people don't get enough practice at it, they won't be great at it ;-).

And places like Ajijic (where we were), where they have resident foreigners who live there for months at a time, at least, are better I think. It's not worth hassling someone for a bit of business, when you can build a pleasant relationship with them and get lots of business from them over time.

I'm sure some of it is down to the local customs and culture and history, though, of course.

I don't mind being direct and saying "no". I mind saying "no" and being ignored or followed or verbally abused. Which was the situation we had in Morocco.

So how bad is Turkey? It probably varies from area to area ...

I can answer about Turkey (but bear in mind it was 12 years ago).

We were hassled like hell all the way through Turkey. I cannot tell you how many carpet shops we visited purely because we didn't have the guts to say no.

But, it really enhanced the experience. We met such interesting people.

The only place I received worse hassling was in Egypt.

I am living in Brazil and look like the ulimate wealthy tourist - red hair, fair skin, blue eyes and I can honestly say I have never been hassled. People are charming, especially if you can speak a little of the language. Currently I'm in Brasilia, the capital but previously spend 2 years in Sao Paulo (horrible place). There is a lot of poverty here but the only time people ever approach to sell you something is when you are in a traffic jam. I usually smile, say no thanks and off they go, no problems. I would sugggest that you try visiting a country in South America for a hassle free trip.
For what its worth, I've been to Turkey twice on business and hated the place because of the constant hassel and need to haggle.

Worth knowing, about Turkey.

I don't think we'll make it to South America any time soon, I'm afraid. It's an awful long way from the UK. The trip to Mexico was too far, and that's not as far as South America.

NQC - sometimes it can help if you learn a few local phrases - like no - not today etc and learn to say them with confidence.

No experience of Turkey but have heard that there can be lots of hassle.

Hmm, in Morocco, I didn't speak any Arabic, but I did speak reasonably good French, which helped some, but not enough. I think DH and I have too-obvious colouring (dark hair, but very pale), and he is 6'4", which limits his ability to pass for a local in nearly all countries.