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Original poster

Never organise a house swap

37 replies

Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:25

Well, as usual, nothing really important to ask but I'm a bit puzzled about the following:

Some friends of us contacted us via e-mail some months ago asking if we knew of somebody in our city willing to do a house swap. I felt a bit ackward about it as they have not contacted us in several years and the last contact we had was when we rang them to say we were pregnant but they had to interrupt the call and never rang us back, nor even when they knew DS was born. We only knew somebody in the position for a swap and talked to her, when I sent them her details they answered that they were willing to prepare a website to show their house and get more people interested in order to "choose" the swapper they liked best (but we needed to "publicise" their house IYWIM). I tried to wash my hands out of the issue and they finally agreed to exchange with our neighbour.

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:28

Chapter II

Neighbour learnt these friends were somewhat rich and got to "redesign" her house not to be less than them, friends abroad started asking neighbour to sort things that IMO they should have to sort themselves: asking for cot, have the house child friendly, a staircase gate, etc when my friend has had no toddlers for about ten years!. And neighbour started complaining about these things to me.

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:29

Chapter III

In the mean time we found neighbour's girls rummaging through our house, learnt that one of them still pee in the bed, and that mother smokes pot. So I spent all this time worrying for both houses although I have not get a single phone call during this time from friends abroad to ask or even thank us for all the hassle.

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:31

Chapter IV

Up until a couple of hours of friends' we didn't even know at what time they were coming though they were going to pick up keys from our house (waiting all the day, thank you very much).

Friends not happy with the house and criticising neighbour all the time, while their children have taken into trashing the house like ripping off blinds, telephone cords and peeing on neighbour's new sissal carpet! . I really don't want to hear what neighbour's girls may have done in friends' house either.

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:33

Chapter V

Although I was happy to have them around, we have not had, really, a nice time, I believe we have become a bit different with time and don't tend to agree with what they think nor do they with us. Besides, they seem so protective of their holiday agenda that we feel a bit as if we were intruding, they don't pick up the phone and sometimes, when their children do, we are told that parents can't speak to us because they are taking a nap, are reading in another room, etc. They didn't answer most of our messages.

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:35

As they are leaving tomorrow, I asked them if they wanted to come around for a drink to say good bye, first they said yes but that would have to be abit late because they were packing. At 10:30 we haven't heard anything from them so we send a text asking them to tell us when it was a good time to pick up something that we have left overthere and if we would see them before they leave tomorrow, they replied that they were still packing and that they could see us around 11:00, at 11:20 they were not here and then we received a text saying that we were welcome to come for a drink at their house. DS has long gone to sleep, I rang them and again children picked up the phone (would they ever get it that when the phone rings is because somebody needs to speak to an adult?). So, I said it was a bit late but probably we'll see them tomorrow, they said they weren't sure about what time will be good as they have to go to mass before heading to the airport, that he is going at 8 and she at 11 while the other one takes care of the children. I offered myself to take care of the children so they could go together and was told the other one has to continue preparing the things (?)

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 00:36

So... the big question is... what stops me from wasting tomorrow's morning waiting to see if they come or not other than getting the keys back? and why on Earth I feel guilty that things have not turned out as nice as we expected???

Thanks if you have read through all this. And think carefully before organising one....

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Tortington · 28/08/2005 00:59

i would think fuck 'em. post something to the effect of " gone out post the keys in letter box"

then go out. and buy chocolate

suzywong · 28/08/2005 01:06

you won't get any better advice than custardo's

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 01:21

They are not that mean, really, I believe we have put a lot of effort so they could have a nice holiday but still, it feels as if we have not lived up to their expectations which makes me feel out of place and a bit annoyed...

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jampots · 28/08/2005 01:25

yes I agree Chandra - you feel responsible because you put them in touch with each other. In the words of Custardo "fuck em" you're not responsible - they are all adults and make their own decisions. Also think about crossing them off your xmas card list for you.

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 12:47

Following to uyesterday, they have come around 11:00 asking if we could take care of the kids for 10 min, I'm not bothered that the children have stayed for almost 2 hrs, but I'm fuming because before getting into the car they told me about all the things that got damaged so I could explain to the neighbour what happened (couldn't they have written a not for her FGS???? ) They also hand me 40 pounds to pay for the cleaning of the damaged carpet, but as far as I know sisal is not cleanable, once the spot is in is there to stay. To make the things worse that carpet is very big and I don't expect it to cost less than 300-400 to replace! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

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hercules · 28/08/2005 12:50

Can't say it better than custardo!

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 12:52

I think I'm going to write a note for the neighbour with all their telephone numbers and tell her that if she had any question just to ring them all the time until they pick up the phone!

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Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 13:00

Oh and they also left me homework to do, I'm supposed to empty the washing machine (with all the bedding), put things to dry and go back later to fold them up, or as she explained, to iron the badding !!! (who irons the bedding nowadays??????? ) What do they think I am? Part of the service? a travel rep?

Thanks for your posts, I certainly I have not oportunity to F them as they are already gone, now how do I get myself out of this???

Sorry for the ranting... alone at home atm

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Janh · 28/08/2005 13:06

Another vote for custardo's approach - pity it's too late.

Chandra, you are such a sweetie, I am sorry they have taken advantage of you like this. The bedding is no concern of yours (I don't imagine for a minute the neighbours at their own house will have provided laundry service for them when they get back!!!)

You have done far more than any of them deserved, it's not your concern or responsibility, if either of the women tries to use you as a go-between just repeat the relevant phone number to them until they get the message.

Is it too early for a drink?

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 13:14

I'm rummaging around the house trying to find some chocolate! .

OMG Janh!, you are right! what is this woman going to think when she realises my neighbour has not ironed the bedding???? I think it may be worth to disconect the telephone for a couple of days.

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giraffeski · 28/08/2005 13:58

Message withdrawn

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 14:01

Too late, they have just rang form the road saying they forgot some keys and asking to be sent to their home, did I hear the word please??? nope

I think those keys are going to take a hell of a time to arrive...

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moondog · 28/08/2005 14:01

Words fail me.
Bit worried as I fancy doing a house swap,but i suppose this one was privately done eh?

Original poster
Chandra · 28/08/2005 14:07

I think it should be OK as long as you go directly to the person swaping rather than asking a friend about that. There are some nice websites for that, I would recommend to exchange with somebody who has children the age of yours, that way you and she will know what is better to keep out of the way.

...

no, I think I'm not being accurate there... this experience has really put me off of swaping our house at least until DS is a bit older and more civilised, so I can esxpect him to take care of other people's things and ask the same in return. Will never ask a friend to organise it for me, it may damage the friendship and cause him/her some problems...

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giraffeski · 28/08/2005 14:10

Message withdrawn

giraffeski · 28/08/2005 14:11

Message withdrawn

moondog · 28/08/2005 15:05

giraffeski,what two places was the swap between?

giraffeski · 28/08/2005 15:12

Message withdrawn

moondog · 28/08/2005 15:13

Oh! Is she in Spain? (Don't answer if tmi being required!)