Did you child make the most of their gap year?

[Reachingforthestarshigh]

Not sure DC is making the most of it.

They work part time, mostly 2 days per week but sometimes 3. They are supposed to be studying for a maths test in Jan; hopefully they are, ocassionally goes out but not very often. Loves nothing more than spending time in their room on their laptop, not sure if studying, watching Netflix, reading. Maybe a mix. Started with a big plan re going to gym, investing, etc which quickly went downhill.

They are responsible and got top marks on A levels so perhaps I should just relax and let them be. University will sort them out in September.

Tricky one. If they’re happy, leave them be I guess. But do try to make them understand that it’s a precious year and not time that’s easy to get again. So it needs to be worth it.
Two of mine took gap years, one worked for 6 months then travelled for 6 months.
The other just worked solidly and put everything into high interest savings!!
They have very interesting discussions about who did best…….

Thank you. I will encourage them to revisit the plan they made at the beginning and do some of the things they intended

My gap year travel taught me so much and changed the direction of my life. I’d strongly suggest some travel out volunteering programme, they are unlikely to get another opportunity like this in their lives. Even go do the work they’re doing in Australia or something, backpack in India, inter-rail down to former Yugoslavia, get out of their room.

I think you’re right to encourage more than what’s currently happening. As PP have said, this is such a special time; they shouldn’t fritter the year away. They will certainly regret it if they do. They’ve had several months to get over the work of A levels and it sounds like they could be slipping into bad habits which is so easy to do.

It doesn’t have to be glamorous. Centuries ago I had big living overseas plans for my year out but they didn’t come to fruition (my fault) so i ended up working at home nearly the whole year (in a sock factory and a crisp factory😀) but my savings were useful and enabled me to pay for a degree-related course and a holiday to the country whose language i was going to study.

It does sound like they’re very responsible so hopefully a nudge will get them back on track.

My two DC both spent a lot of their gap year in full time work. Their place of employment took them back each year in their vacations. DS worked till April and then travelled with a friend. DD visited a friend in Europe and spent three months in America as an au pair before going to uni. She said she could tell instantly which of her fellow students had had a gap year as they were more mature but you do have to do more than sit in your bedroom playing games. They could be building up their CV. How about volunteering one day a week at a local charity shop or food bank?

Yes they both did but ime most do not (I employ 16-25 yos so meet many). Mine managed to save up the £ to fund a year of Uni loan free and travelled. They both worked a full time job and topped up with a gig economy job working 60-70 hrs a week whilst they were home. I guess everyones idea of "making the most of it" is different thou and after A Levels many value the rest and down time. My 2 both scuba dive so wanted to travel a lot which motivated them.

They don’t seem very interested on travelling alone. Will chat to them but will encourage them

They are building up their CV as they are working part time on a related field they wilñ go to study

ds on a gap year in New Zealand. He has gone to train for the sport he does and is also working 2 jobs. He seems to be making the most of it but he had a plan before he went. I think a break is ok and as long as your dc is working etc I would let them have this time as their own.

Thank you all. I will have a chat to them and check what their plans are after the exam in early January. I think they really need to get something out of it.

What about something structured like Camp America? There’s a big camp recruiting fair in January in London.
If they are a member of scouting or guiding there’s opportunities to volunteer at world centres.

working and (subject to online expenditure) not spending on going out sounds like a very good preparation for university assuming bank of mum and dad is not intending to support university "extravagances" such as travel and a uni social life.

Thank you all. I don’t mind having a rest as university will be full on, they are going to do engineering but I think they need to get something out of it. They have such a different routine to the rest of the family. Go to bed, wake up really late on the days they don’t work.

My daughter is doing extra hours in her weekend job - was average about 25 but now 35 with Xmas. Shes had a couple of weekends away then is off to Asia for a month in the spring plus a festival abroad and another holiday planned.

I think she’s making the most of it - majority of friends are on gap years.

DD went solo inter railing and came home after 11 days. She found travelling solo hard as she had no one to share the highs or lows with. Having a train cancelled and arriving after dark into Budapest with no local currency or idea where the bus stop was to get to her hostel, was what finished her off. She realised that having a support network was key to making travel enjoyable.

She came home, regrouped, and decided to do Workaway. She spent 4 months au pairing for a family in Germany and this was life changing. She changed her degree choice and reapplied to 5 completely different university choices during that 4 months. She is still in touch with the family and has been back 3 times since. DD then went off to Nepal with VSO and lived in a rural community for 4 months. She did a degree in Geography with German (even though she only had GCSE German, but became a pretty fluent speaker with 4 months full emersion). She now has a career that involves lots of travel.

DS, on the other hand, worked his whole Gap Year. He had no interest in travel. He grew in confidence so much during that year. It was the covid year. He worked in the post office sorting office, then a covid test centre. He worked with lots of cabin crew and cruise ship entertainers who were out of work. They really brought him out of himself. When he started uni, he got a university job easily because of this public facing role. He also saved lots and bought his first car with the money.

As for my Gap Year... a year working in a barristers chambers then a prison.