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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Durham uni college allocations - has he missed something?

27 replies

SearchingForTuna · 24/03/2025 23:08

DS had an offer from Durham a few weeks ago and attended the offer holder day today. He visited loads of colleges as he didn’t know which he would like (but now has some ideas)

He thought though that a few people were talking about getting their allocated college already - and that he should have submitted a form by now. Is there a deadline for this that he has missed?! He’s normally ok with admin but has been so busy with open days all over the place

Has he irredeemably messed up; can anyone advise? I can see the basic info on the website about ranking the colleges but nothing about timescales or a cut off date

OP posts:
Jaxx · 24/03/2025 23:31

Just checked on website 9th May is the deadline.

https://www.durham.ac.uk/colleges-and-student-experience/colleges/undergraduate-membership-and-accommodation/expressing-a-preference---undergraduate/

What colleges is he interested in?

I would advise that he/you read about the allocation process very thoroughly. I think most students don’t and put all the popular colleges first and then are shocked when they end up being allocated one of their much lower choices.

Expressing a Preference - Undergraduate - Durham University

https://www.durham.ac.uk/colleges-and-student-experience/colleges/undergraduate-membership-and-accommodation/expressing-a-preference---undergraduate/

24Dogcuddler · 24/03/2025 23:40

Seem to remember it was quite late when our eldest DD heard about college allocation and accommodation at Durham.
That was about 15 years ago though.
She was in Chads on the Bailey.

Don’t know if this is any use? Can he email or does anyone at school know?

www.palatinate.org.uk/explained-how-does-durham-university-allocate-college-accommodation/#:~:text=that%20academic%20year.-,St.,also%20reallocated%20(see%20graph).

stillundecided · 24/03/2025 23:41

He will have received an email soon after he received the offer inviting him to log into a portal and put the colleges in order of preference. There's no rush though and no benefit in doing it before the deadline.

SearchingForTuna · 24/03/2025 23:44

Thank you! I did go through the website and google but didn’t see that bit. That’s a relief

He liked lots of them, and all for different reasons! Castle for the castle, Trevelyan for the music (guitarist), Greys because studying Maths and it’s close to the dept, St Mary’s (I think it was) big with nice grounds and so on. But is very aware that it’s just a preference anyway and many people don’t get their preferred one

I heard there are tables listing which are the most and least oversubscribed - so is it best to go through those and maybe make his 2nd, 3rd, 4th etc less popular but still good to him iyswim? It seems so random, the whole thing; presumably it changes each year anyway…

OP posts:
SearchingForTuna · 24/03/2025 23:47

Great - yes I can see a few stats etc now. I know he wanted to decide looking at size of intake etc which will take a while but he has time. Panic over, for now!

OP posts:
Jaxx · 25/03/2025 02:20

That sounds like a good selection and he should get one of his top preferences. It is those that put all the Bailey colleges along with Collingwood and St Mary’s in the top slots who can be unlucky and end up being allocated their 8th choice or below.

SearchingForTuna · 25/03/2025 06:56

Thank you @Jaxx it’s very helpful to have a view on this.

He’s just confirmed he’s aware of the deadline but wants to put the rankings in this week and then forget about it, which is probably the right attitude!

OP posts:
dermalermalurd · 25/03/2025 07:06

If it helps, my DS is in year 2 at Durham and he wanted a self-catering college. He went with one of the hill colleges and he is so glad he did. He has met a much more diverse set of students than tend to be in the Bailey colleges. This is just a rule of thumb, of course, it’s just that Durham does have a bit of a reputation for being a bit elitist but it’s not like that all over.

Brienneoftarthismyhero · 20/05/2025 20:18

I know an old thread but anyone heard back about college allocation at Durham . DD is stressing as everyone in a group she met who are looking to go to Durham got their allocation emails today but she hasn’t heard

MillicentFaucet · 20/05/2025 20:31

Brienneoftarthismyhero · 20/05/2025 20:18

I know an old thread but anyone heard back about college allocation at Durham . DD is stressing as everyone in a group she met who are looking to go to Durham got their allocation emails today but she hasn’t heard

Yes, there's a few of us chatting about it on the "Offers for 2025" thread.
I think DS received his email just after lunch.Here

Brienneoftarthismyhero · 20/05/2025 20:54

@MillicentFaucet thank you . 🙏 Just posted there - my dd is stressing so much and not helping as she had two big exams on Thursday . English lit and geography in one day!

Farlston · 21/05/2025 15:35

DS has been allocated to St John’s - anyone else allocated there?

Freesolo1975 · 21/05/2025 18:35

My DS has been accepted in his first choice college of Collingwood. Im feeling quite nervous for him as he struggled at the open day as he found the students be talked to were very public school type (that is not a criticism of public school kids but very different to him) He’s very academic but from a less wealthy background, and is worried he won’t fit in. Are there any parents here with children who went to Durham who came from less privileged backgrounds who fit in? He is going to be doing bio medical engineering

alisonloves · 21/05/2025 22:17

Freesolo1975 · 21/05/2025 18:35

My DS has been accepted in his first choice college of Collingwood. Im feeling quite nervous for him as he struggled at the open day as he found the students be talked to were very public school type (that is not a criticism of public school kids but very different to him) He’s very academic but from a less wealthy background, and is worried he won’t fit in. Are there any parents here with children who went to Durham who came from less privileged backgrounds who fit in? He is going to be doing bio medical engineering

Yes mine! It’s honestly a mixture like all universities. My DS has a mix of friends from different schools and he has not experienced a majority of either and there have been no issues, they’re all just mates! It’s honestly no different to friends experience's elsewhere. Collingwood was his first choice (he got a different college not on his list!) and he loves it there, I’m sure your DS will too 😊

WombatChocolate · 21/05/2025 22:28

I wonder if they really are very different to him? He clearly has that perception, but is it about stereotypes and just some insecurities?

Does he have hobbies and interests? Play sport? Like socialising? Enjoy his subject area? There are so many different clubs and places to meet people.

He’s opted for a catered college which is more expensive - so does that mean he won’t be really hard up?

When you say less wealthy background, do you simply mean a pretty average background from a standard comp, or do you mean from a background with lots of disadvantage? I actually suspect you mean the former, but I might be wrong.

There are students from public schools - boarding schools. They won’t be a massive number. There will be lots more from private day schools. Many of those families will be pretty similar to many middle class families who send their kids to comps. They all value education, support their kids and most have had access to to some extra curricular over the years. Yes, those in private schools might have had smaller classes and more support at school, but especially in 6th form, the differences might be less than you think. Lots of those privately educating families make a lot of sacrifices to afford fees and aren’t living lavish lifestyles. Most students don’t do paid work in term time but quite a lot do and most will be working in holidays and doing work experience too.

The thing about uni is that it’s this great moment for teens to branch out. Most have had pretty narrow life experiences and lots haven’t known lots of people from outside their school and imagine all kinds of things about people who they think might be different. To be honest, teens can stereotype and be prejudiced more than many other ages.

But they all arrive and want to make friends and of course most people are easy to get on with. You always click more with some than others and people veer towards certain personality types or interests, but one of the joys is having friends who have different regional accents and the type of school people went to is rarely a discussion point.

Students from significantly disadvantaged backgrounds from areas with low uni uptake, or communities with all kinds of other disadvantage might well feel that most have no idea about their lives. They might have access to the Durham Access schemes, financial support, mentoring etc and of course all the students who get in are able and capable. But I think most top unis for those from really disadvantaged backgrounds (of whom there are still far too few) often do find it culturally tricky - but that doesn’t mean they don’t make friends, achieve huge things or have the time of their lives.

Op, is it you more than your DS who is worried about this? Often u think it’s actually parents who have the worry more than the kids. If he has an offer he is capable of being there. Financial background or type of school really isn’t the biggest issue. If you’re friendly and up for joining stuff, it generally works well. These days many teens have anxiety, are diagnosed with neurodiversity and have various challenges or struggles, but Durham works out well for most of them too and they role find their groups and branch into young adulthood.

Enciurage him about his capability academically and his many great qualities and that people will like meeting him and he will make friends. He liked Durham and applied. He liked Collingwood,?put it first and has been lucky enough to get his top choice. Nerves during A Levrls are normal. Fears about going away are normal. Button the end the teens going there in late September are all just clever young adults stepping into independence. There is far more to unite them. If they go with an eye to oook out for people being different or with prejudice about those who are well off or from certain types of school - they can probably find things to confirm their prejudices and feed them. But if they go open minded to take people as they are as individuals, things usually work out well.

madgreenlemons · 21/05/2025 23:39

@Freesolo1975Let’s just be for realsies here that Durham is worse than a lot of other universities for ‘rah’ types. But should be fine in a hill college like collingwood, and studying a science rather than an arts subject

WombatChocolate · 22/05/2025 09:20

So is the suggestion that ‘rah types’ are some kind of pariah to be avoided? Is the suggestion that colleges should be picked on the basis of this and people/places where such people might be, avoided?

Yes, Durham does have a higher percentage of privately educated kids than most places. But that comment sounds like the kind of thing racists used to say about avoiding living in ghettoised areas. I find it deeply concerning if kids and particularly parents are encouraging that attitude.

Again, uni is about getting out of your comfort zone academically and being in a new area with a wider range of experience and people than before. Having an open mind is a vital part of it.

Yeah, I suppose anyone who wants to avoid people who they are so sure must be different to them and avoided, ought to go to uni close to home and live at home and go to lectures online and only venture out as little as possible. But that’s v sad in my view.

Colleges have a mix of people….of course! Catered colleges will usually have more from affluent backgrounds, simply because catered costs more. Collingwood is a sporty college and actually probably has more privately educated kids than most Hill colleges. But so what. Are those suggesting such a laces are avoided saying so because they don’t hunk their kids won’t want to mix with privately educated or that privately educated won’t want to mix with their kids? This is a parent problem if perception's and if pushed onto kids is a real problem. Pushing prejudice of any type just isn’t okay.

Freesolo1975 · 22/05/2025 09:29

Aagh I didn’t realise it was catered, I’ve let him research and bake his own choice but lesson learnt I should have overseen it before he sent it off. He’ll have to try and change it. He’s taking out student loans to pay for everything as I can’t help him out financially . He’ll come out at the end with a lot of debt.
He is very sporty and the suggestion of joining clubs is a great idea as he is a bit introverted so hopefully he’ll find his tribe
thanks everyone for the advice and reassurance

WombatChocolate · 22/05/2025 11:39

Lots of people want to change college after allocation. But they are adamant that the only reason is if the college can’t meet a medical need.

If he’s a but introverted, maybe the meals will be helpful in getting out to meet people. It’s a very big college so there will be lots of people and he will find his tribe. It’s also a very popular college, which maybe is why he picked it. There will be jobs in town and in college such as at the student bar which can help. And lots of people have full loans. If he has a summer job in advance or plans to work in uni holidays when at home, it’s easy to earn a few £k to boost the pot anyway.

Im sure it will work out.

madgreenlemons · 22/05/2025 12:41

University is a massive culture shock. And if you arrive there and you’re not from a privileged background and the place is absolutely dominated by people from privileged backgrounds then it can be more shocking and harder to adjust. That is of course not to say you shouldn’t try, but you should be prepared for that challenge. Think the balance in collingwood will be ok, and not so shocking as on on the bailey, from the anecdata I have.

alisonloves · 22/05/2025 14:55

Freesolo1975 · 22/05/2025 09:29

Aagh I didn’t realise it was catered, I’ve let him research and bake his own choice but lesson learnt I should have overseen it before he sent it off. He’ll have to try and change it. He’s taking out student loans to pay for everything as I can’t help him out financially . He’ll come out at the end with a lot of debt.
He is very sporty and the suggestion of joining clubs is a great idea as he is a bit introverted so hopefully he’ll find his tribe
thanks everyone for the advice and reassurance

My DS is in catered and it’s still a mixture. It’s worth checking affordability before turning it down as it wasn’t as bad as we thought price wise and it’s nice to know breakfast, lunch and dinner are all provided each day and it’s one less thing for you to worry about. My DS is absolutely adamant it’s not any specific group there, others may have had that experience but he hasn’t and I’d echo that from what i witnessed moving him in and chatting to the students and parents 😊

Jaxx · 22/05/2025 15:15

My son’s experience of a catered Bailey college is that although there are some from boarding schools, they do not dominate. There are a mix of students from all school types. He has loved his first year and is particularly looking forward to his month of fun and relaxation once he finishes his exams next week.

Your son may also be eligible for a Durham Grant if he qualifies for a the full loan amount. It’s just under £3,000 - you don’t have to do anything it is based on the info provided to student finance.

RayonSunrise · 22/05/2025 16:31

@madgreenlemons I dunno - my very limited anecdata so far is showing quite a few boarding school kids have been allocated the same hill college as my DD - she and the one other state school student on the recently convened group chat are keeping pretty quiet!

mondaytosunday · 22/05/2025 17:36

Really. Can’t believe that this is still an issue. My DD is at a catered Bailey college and says in general there is quite a prejudice against privately educated students (and not the other way around) so she stays mum about where she went to school (selective independent).
As for cost, she gets full maintenance and the Durham Grant, so I haven’t had to give her anything. But regardless, rents in Y2/3 will probably be equivalent to a catered college as it’s for 52 weeks.

WombatChocolate · 22/05/2025 19:34

Maybe it’s best not to join chat groups too much and just wait until you get there and then you can genuinely take people as you find them.

They are young and often lacking fully developed social skills. They are looking for common ground and when you have limited life experience, school is a big part of that.

My DS decided last year he wouldn’t join any chat groups until post results, as he didn’t know for sure he’d be going or if college reallocations would happen. Actually he didn’t join any either after results. Lots of them are full of self doubt and their confidence is easily knocked, so maybe best to wait.

My DS went into Freshers really determined to be extremely friendly and go to as much as possible. He out himself out there with his corridor, college, course mates etc. He said with hindsight it was exhausting but necessary and FOMO is very real. But once lectures started things improved. He met more course mates and found a routine to his week. Societies started which also gave some structure to the week and within 3 weeks he had found the friends he’s still with, although positively others have found the group and enlarged it as the year has gone on. I remember asking him what kind of schools his friends went to - maybe at Christmas. I think he knew about one of them but didn’t know about the others. As they started house hunting he said they’d sat down and discussed budget and were looking at stuff in the lowest budget and were all happy with that. I’ve only heard him talk about people he likes - never people he doesn’t like. That’s not to say he’s friends with everyone, but he doesn’t have issues with people….and surely most are like that.

We feel scared for them and defensive of them as they are our babies. We are both proud and excited about them going into the works, but worry they will be hurt or struggle. It’s normal parent feelings, but we have to let them get on with it. We mustn’t feed their fears and whilst we mustn’t deny them, our job is to encourage them and remind them that they will be ready for this. Think the best of people and expect to like most people. It will be an adventure with the odd rocky bit no doubt, but this will be their time. Being 18/19 and setting out - amazing opportunity.

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