ADD/ASD help at uni - which ones to apply to

[TrainGame]

DD in year 12 and we’re now looking at university for her.

Shes bright but gets overwhelmed quite quickly, is also a slow processor.

We live in London so we have lots of local unis as an option for her to apply to, but I wonder if living on a campus uni like Bath or Nottingham might be good for her.

She does struggle with friends, really wants more but often finds it hard to make deep bonds with others.

I think it would be a good experience for her to live out and acquire more life skills like shopping, cooking, doing her own washing and cleaning, budgeting etc. living with other. ADD can make some of these things hard with organisation/executive function etc. and ASD can make friends hard.

Would anyone know if there are unis that are particularly supportive of ND and also if you think she should live at home or live out?

id feel safer with her at home but also wonder if id be holding her back?

She’s looking at Bath, Exeter, Bristol, Surrey and some of the London unis.

Also, do they continue to get extra time like they do at school, at uni.

Thanks very much for any thoughts or experience you might be to share.

The other question I have is thinking of employment - what sort of work should she consider. She should do well at a level but I’m aware after she may not have the bubbly chatty social skills of a normie that works well at interview. She can amp it up a bit but I’d love her to find a supportive environment for work. Any thoughts on that?

A campus university is a good idea, especially if you can find one that has catered halls as that is one less thing for her to worry about in the first year. But, it would probably be best if you could find one not too far from home just in case. Bath is a good choice, they seem to be very geared up for ASD (my youngest went on a residential there, not an ASD specific one, but they had lots of posters up with social stories on etc). Nottingham has a large, beautiful campus with lots of societies, everything you could want on campus including a medical centre, hairdressers, swimming pool. The only possible down side is it is known as a party university so can be noisy at night, even in quiet accommodation.

It depends what your daughter wants really, if she wants to be surrounded by people and have lots to keep her occupied, she might be best somewhere like Nottingham. If she is happy somewhere quieter, Loughborough suits some (even if not sporty) and they seem quite proactive with support.

As for future careers, it depends what degree she wants to do, to some extent. The obvious answer is computer science, electrical engineering or civil engineering if she likes science.

They need to apply for DSA when applying for student finance which gives extra support, it doesn't continue on from school. Extra time is available for exams and coursework if needed, and a smaller room. This might vary. You'd be best going to a few open days and talking to student support.

Also there was a thread not long ago about a similar issue with lots of recommendations so I'll link it just in case it is helpful:https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5240887-best-uni-for-young-woman-with-asd-anxiety-and-depression

Bristol is a city rather than a campus uni, I would probably give that one a miss personally, nightmare with accommodation in yrs 2 and 3 as well I think (although that's probably not unusual). We wrote it off straight away though so didn't even visit.

We went to Surrey and it is very different to the RG unis IMO, the whole vibe was far more student centric from what we saw. The lecturers were much more teaching orientated rather than only interested in their own research in contrast to what we found at the RG's.

We went to Southampton and the first thing the lecturer said was 'don't expect me ever know any of your names if you come here'. not the best welcome! The next lecturer was admittedly much more engaging. At Exeter we weren't allowed in the talk and DS said the lecturer just went on about their own quite specific and random seeming research. The Surrey lecturers on the other hand talked passionately about projects their students had done. You could tell it was an ex poly rather than an RG but in a lot of positive ways I thought. It was certainly doing really well in the ratings as well from what I could see.

DS has ASD too, he didn't end up going to uni though as he got a degree apprenticeship. He is not in anyway bubbly either. My advice on the job front would be to always ask if they will provide the interview questions in advance for autistic applicants - they won't always, but worth asking as it is becoming more and more of a thing and makes a huge difference. DS got offered a place at one of the apprenticeships that happily gave him questions in advance. Anything government or civil service are really good for this IME.

The next thing I'd do is to make sure she has lots of extracurriculars beyond just doing her degree - this is essential to make her stand out. Having a part time, being part of relevant societies and involved in their running in her final years, any sports teams if she likes sports, and kind of mentoring (maybe other kids with ASD starting at uni), any student involvement things such as helping out on open days etc. Any extra curriculars related to her subject/job interest that go beyond her degree course.

She will probably find that in applying for jobs she will get an idea of whether they are likely to be a supportive environment or not based on how they respond to her asking if they give questions in advance and how they are at interview. I would say apply to as many jobs as possible and be prepared to move to get a job. Discuss and practice with her questions she might be asked in interview, she will find the more she does the easier they get - tell her that even if she doesn't get the job the practice is really valuable. Also make sure she is selling herself on her CV/covering letter - kids with ASD are not always very good at this.

Thanks so much @worcesterpear and @Lisa593 you’ve both given me much to think about and look into further. 🙏