Do you help fund your Dc through Uni?

[TheHullabaloo]

Do you help finance your Dc whilst at uni, particularly if they don't get the full maintenance loan due to parental income, or do you think as they are adults, and choosing to go to uni, they should work alongside studying to fund themselves?

I’m not sure some consider this on the whole “oooh I want another baby” threads. That’s a tiny time period you are bringing a child into the world that you need to do right by as they get older. There is less and less state support now.

We paid accommodation, all transport costs back and forth and the occasional treat/food delivery etc

Yes, we have 2 at Uni on minimum loan. We top them up by £6k per year each, plus we pay for phone contracts, dental work, a few big shops and various bits and bobs they need. Happy to do so. Budgeted since birth for this expense, and it impacted on our decisions re family size, house/mortgage size, number of holidays taken etc throughout the years. My parents gave me money for Uni in the 90s, as I wasn't entitled to a grant based on their income.

Yes. You never stop supporting your children, adult or not. That's the deal with being a parent. We paid for their private education, we had a reduced lifestyle because of that decision. We also supported them through uni. They have loans, but we made up the difference. We additionally paid for phones, cars, health, etc etc

DD1 has just bought her first flat, mid twenties, all on her own, no help from us, she is thrilled and we are very proud of and for her.

You help and support at whatever point they need you to help in whatever way you are able.

We are paying for his accommodation. Also now thinking we will give him an allowance a month for food £175-200. He gets the 4ishk maintenance loan and will also work.

Me too

I can't believe you are even asking this. Why would you NOT want to support them at such an important and stressful time in their academic lives. I can't believe what some people come out with, regarding supporting their own offspring on here. If you can't afford to help, that's a different issue.
My own two had jobs through Uni out of choice, in fact they us jobs since leaving school, but I was more concerned about the workload they had than making for even more difficult for them.
Your children don't ask to be born, you brought them into the world, so do you really resent giving them a helping hand though life? It's a joke that some people think their child should be independent at 18.

Yes, of course. The loans system is calculated on the basis of an expected parental contribution, so those students with parents who can't/won't pay the expected sum based on their household income are hugely disadvantaged.

I agree that the expected parental contribution seems to come as a surprise to some parents, so this definitely needs to be better publicised so that people can properly plan ahead.

I also agree that the loans should be based on parental income rather than household income. So many people are shocked to find that a step-parent/live-in partner's income will impact on how much a student can borrow. Again, this needs to be better publicised so that people can make informed decisions before moving a partner in with them.

We were putting money away for uni or equivalent from the dc being young.
Now we put money in dgc’s bank.

We paid accommodation and books plus grocery shops when we visited.
However we were very fortunate in that we could afford to do so.

I had a work colleague whose dh earned well and she had decent part time hours and she said her dc would have to sort themselves out if they went to uni because she wouldn’t be paying. The dc were infants at the time and I was quite surprised at her attitude. Surely if you are willing to pay hundreds a month for nursery then uni contribution would be cheap in comparison.

Yes and we saved from birth to be able to support them as well as it influencing our decision on how many children we had.

Yes! Why wouldn't you? We pay tuition and maintenance, plus costs, for dd.

My son won’t get the maximum loan due to my income however, I will lose the money his dad gives me of £400, child benefit and to then find another £500 to make up the loan is just not doable.

Single income, high mortgage, CoL. I’ll have very little left after all bills and loan paid. I’m should be more comfortably off at my age but life is shit, I’ll be even worse off when he goes to university. In my 50’s and it’s just a fucking grind!

I have known students not receive help and have also known students who were denied assistance because their parent didn’t approve of the course they were doing. If parents can help most will. I worked in HE for 30 years so had many a student issue bought to my door including finances.

I lucked out big time because DS is doing a degree apprenticeship. He would have only be entitled to minimum loan. We fully expected to be topping him up but did expect him to work over summer holidays. So he has zero tuition fees and is about to be on around 31k PA as in year two of his apprenticeship plus he has a guaranteed job. I am delighted that’s he has gone down this route.

@Birdseyetrifle will your ex give some money directly to your ds to assist? Then at least the top up to assist would be less for you.

We have no choice if we want DD to go to Uni.
When her accommodations costs are taken from her loan she starts on MINUS £6000.

@ViciousCurrentBun i very much doubt it. He doesn’t see DS and hasn’t for years and now when he does sporadically text DS does not respond and wants nothing to do with him. If DS were to ask he would insist on some form of contact and DS does not want any due to his previous behaviour around contact and letting him down.

I’ve said he could try through court to get him to continue to pay.

I pay accommodation, it would be impossible otherwise, the maintenance loan isn't enough to cover accommodation never mind, food, clothes etc.

Do you literally provide no support thought? Or have you, for example, provided him with household items from home, lifts to and from university, board and lodging in holidays, food orders?

That sounds like very expensive.

My dd gets the minimum loan so it doesn't cover the cost of her accommodation, but over £10k for accommodation only sounds excessive! Is she in catered halls or something?

We pay accommodation and they work in the holidays to fund everything else. FWIW most of our friends have paid full tuition fees as well as accommodation etc for their DC's.

I have noticed a tendency for these DC's to not take their university education hugely seriously - ie constantly returning home in term times and watching lectures online rather than in person etc. Upon graduation an awful lot of them then take another gap year or two to go travelling.

Based on my personal experience I would suggest that those who have had to work or take out loans to fund their degree do tend to take it more seriously and are keen to get into paid work.

Yes Catered and ensuite.
For MH reasons it was the only option really and it was a major reason why DD chose that Uni because it was available.

My DS is taking a year out to earn before uni, we can support him but it's his choice and he's said he'd rather be able to pay at least a years fees upfront.

Fair enough. If it includes all of her food, then it isn't wildly different from what most students probably end up paying for food and accommodation overall - a bit more expensive for sure, but she won't have the hassles of cooking and shopping etc.

Mine is always sending me messages asking what I've had delivered to her reception this time. I can't help it. She is and will always be my responsibility to make sure she is safe, fed and loved. And part of that is ensuring that she has the tools to do it for herself as a grown up with a good education and life experience to make her independent.

She would actually have loved to cook herself and doesn't eat a lot so we probably would have saved money but unfortunately she can't share a kitchen, especially a fridge for MH reasons.
We did have a letter from a Private Psych and Counsellor but they wouldn't accept it and her GP was unhelpful (hence the Private Psych) so we have to pay for Catered as it allays her cross contamination fears.
Pre DD I might have had the "suck it up snowflake" view but having been through what we have over the past 10 years its the only way she will make it through Uni.