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Higher education

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5 years ago today... *Content warning: concerns suicide

37 replies

ButtercupCupcakes · 17/08/2023 14:17

I got up early and was very surprised to see my DS18 already up and about, bouncing around like Tigger in anticipation of receiving his A level results.

We left for school way too early, him driving and parked in a large almost empty car park where he practiced his parking and three point turns.

It was here that he had a notification from UCAS that he'd been accepted into his first choice of uni. He was so delighted.

A few weeks later his smile was so wide as I waved him off to start his new life at uni.

Five years on and these are just memories now. My son took his own life at the end of his second year of university. No-one knew anything was wrong or why such a bright, sensible young man would believe that suicide was his only option.

That was the day my world fell apart. I have picked up the pieces for the sake of my remaining family, and make a good show of appearing 'normal' while on the inside I am just dust and stone.

Some days are better than others, but I will live with this pain for the rest of my life.

Rest in peace my beautiful boy.

OP posts:
LIZS · 17/08/2023 14:19

Couldn't read and not post. I am so very sorry for your loss. Flowers

Dixiechickonhols · 17/08/2023 14:21

So sorry to hear that about your much loved son.

Foxymoxy68 · 17/08/2023 14:29

So, so sorry for your loss. Utterly heartbreaking 💔. Would you like to tell us about your son?

travelogue · 17/08/2023 14:29

I'm so, so sorry OP, there aren't really any words. Days like today must be even more raw - I'm sorry. Flowers

LadyNellCardross · 17/08/2023 14:31

I'm sorry OP. I'm sure this is a difficult day that brings back a lot of memories. Thinking of you.

Yesabsolutely · 17/08/2023 14:38

OP your son would have been the same age as my youngest.Am so sorry this happened to your darling boy . I send you my thoughts and virtual hug 💐🌷💐Xx

loobylou10 · 17/08/2023 14:40

I'm so sorry Flowers

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 17/08/2023 14:42

This brought tears to my eyes. I’m so sorry.

FlannelandPuce · 17/08/2023 15:33

So sorry this happened to your family x

chopc · 17/08/2023 15:35

So sorry you are living this nightmare

RedDoughnut · 17/08/2023 15:40

Oh you poor thing. Every parents utter nightmare. I'm so very sorry.

RuPaulsLastPlace · 17/08/2023 15:46

I’m so sorry for your loss OP. Sending love and 💐

BaffledAgain · 17/08/2023 15:56

My son is the same age also. I'm so sorry for your heartbreak, I don't know what to say to help you but my thoughts are with you today x

SaltyCrisps · 17/08/2023 16:01

I'm so very sorry for your loss :-(

FlibbertyGibbitt · 17/08/2023 16:04

Tears for your beloved son 💔

caringcarer · 17/08/2023 16:06

Every parents worst nightmare. It must be so hard just getting through everyday. 🌹

crazeekat · 17/08/2023 16:14

so sorry, sitting here having a cry for you. the pain must be awful. such a trauma. i know there are no words to console you, just remember, let your family be there for you sometimes too, and not always u having to be the strong one. reach out to your family and friends today and remember your boy in your own special way, your special son who will always be in your heart. hugs x

Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand · 17/08/2023 16:16

So sorry for your loss op.. My dd had 2 attempts last year..
Being a dm is tough.

AuntieJune · 17/08/2023 16:17

I'm so sorry op.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 17/08/2023 16:24

So sorry for you and your family, OP. Flowers

DebbyU · 17/08/2023 16:34

I really feel for you. So very,very sorry.

Hapagirl48 · 17/08/2023 16:37

I am so very sorry. We are still reeling from a family friend’s teenage DC’s suicide last year and even as just friends it’s so traumatic and painful. For it to happen to your beautiful boy, there are no words except we hear you and will listen ❤️

Cowlover89 · 17/08/2023 16:40

So sorry for your loss Flowers

Choupette7 · 17/08/2023 16:42

I'm really so sorry to read this. Sending love x

flowertoday · 17/08/2023 16:42

So very sorry for your loss. My nephew took his own life last year. The pain and grief associated with bereavement to a loss from suicide is indescribably awful.
Sending you and your family so much love. Your son sounds like an amazing young man. Please do take the very best of care of yourself 💐❤x