Uni experience as a non party teetotaller

[Wildmoors]

Is it possible to enjoy the uni experience if you don’t like parties or drinking? Does it already put you at a disadvantage when making friends?
Based on my experience it was pretty much expected to go out and get rat arsed. Party alot etc

Yes, you very much mix with lots of different people. You can do anything and be anything, you can follow your own interests and be who you are. There are loads of people who don't drink alcohol and/or aren't party people.

I went 20 years ago and there was a real mix of us even then.
I was a non drinker, as was my friend (my friend was for religious reasons) we were still included by everyone it was nice

I went about ten years ago, a close friend from school went to a different uni and hated drinking and parties, he actually had the most uni friends out of anyone I know. He found his people in a society for a hobby he had and on his course and a few in halls no problem. He is nice and a lovely person but not the most outgoing - not drinking shouldn't be a problem.

My nephews at uni and don't drink.....seems quite a few kids like that these days. Times have changed!

Well that was me 30 years ago and I did OK. DD the same and about to go to uni so hoping she'll be OK. Certainly not drinking is more common now than it was then (think about 25% of 18-15yo or something like that)? DD's uni's accommodation system meant she could look at profiles of those who had already chosen a flat before putting her name down so deliberately chose one with a non-drinker but who liked socialising and one who said they liked nights in or concerts rather than clubbing and bars, so am hoping she'll be with some like-minded people.

On the other hand, a friend's son went as a non-drinker and worried about being the odd one out and by end of first term was most definitely a drinker!

My DC don’t drink, they joined various societies and sports teams and had a great time.

My DD went to uni last year. She likes a drink but not heavily and isn’t in to clubbing. One of her closest friends at Uni doesn’t drink at all and still goes out with them to the pub, societies, various nights out. There are so many societies to join that don’t involve alcohol; my DD even joined the tea society!

At DD's uni there were plenty of alternative options at freshers for the non-drinkers to mix. But I'd say don't shy away from, say, doing pre-drinks with your flatmates before they head out clubbing.

Academic here. I think at least 25% of my recent intake groups of academic advisees are nondrinking (and our students have a historical reputation for drinking). No one will think anything of it

There should be no problem. Advice would be to select quiet halls if available and think about halls rather than student flats. DD, who likes a big night out but not every week found her student flat, where she was the only non clubber, difficult. She was labelled boring, but she felt stoned people were also boring.

DS did not drink, and nor did most of his friends. He really enjoyed University. Possibly about half or his friends were overseas students and a good portion of the rest were from British ethnic minorities, possibly because both groups lacked the traditional British expectations of university life. Common ground was subject (they were a pretty hard working group) or societies.

I had a lovely time. I did all my hobbies - loads of choirs, chamber choir including touring abroad, orchestra etc

Absolutely, my son loved uni and didn't drink or party as it's not his scene. He didn't live in halls though and rented a house share with 5 other students (strangers at the time). He still lives with one now 7 years later! They did party a lot but they all got on so well maybe he was just lucky!

He also worked and came home with savings and more money than he went with! Drinking and parties are expensive 😂

A lot more students are not drinking now. Some uni's even have alcohol free halls or floors of halls which can be requested (started off for religious reasons and has gained momentum where I work).

Tell them to join clubs and societies for what they are interested in.

My son doesn't drink. For the first week he struggled a bit, but he joined the board games society and met alot of people who were just like him. He loves it now.

Not a problem. Neither of my DC are big drinkers. They still go out and have friends.

I’m sure university is very different now to how it was in my day (early 90s) when we spent most of our time out of our heads on whatever intoxicants, legal or otherwise, we could get hold of.

These days there must be plenty of students who don’t drink alcohol for religious, cultural or health reasons. Or because today’s 18-21 year olds socialise online rather than by going to the pub. Or because clubbing isn’t nearly as big a thing these days. Or, because of ‘challenge 25’, they didn’t go out to bars & clubs in their teens the way we did. Or just because they can’t afford to.

My DD gave up drinking in third year. Luckily she'd already made some firm friends by then. To save money, they'd have nights in most of the time, often making a meal for eachother. Obviously that can some with or without alcohol. Going to coffee and chips out at a fast food outlet was also a very popular option. Also, if they join societies, it'll give them the chance to meet people with similar interests, and they can take it from them what they want to do with a potential friend.

There was a girl in our Dept back in the day who not only didn't party or drink, she saved half her grant money and sent it back to her parents who lived in rural Devon. She left with a 1st and prospects to go on to further academia wherever she chose. The rest of us drank ourselves silly and left with 2.2s and fewer prospects. I think this generation of students is a lot more sensible than mine was (in the late 80s / early 90s)and there are a lot more kids with their heads screwed on.

for me, it does limit you to an extent, although for me mine was self choosing , i was mainly library based for my free hours studying various topics very loosely related to my degree, the days of the archaeology magazines etc

My dd doesn't drink, she's in her second year and not found it an issue. As a pp said, a lot more young people don't drink these days. Dd has joined a lot of societies who have evening meetings, trips out etc It's fine.

Looking at how many people have asked this it seems there are plenty of like minded non partying kids out there! My daughter included - one night out socialising in six months is about her limit, and she's never even tried alcohol (and doesn't like chocolate - are we even related)?

My dd is about to start 2nd year. She’s a non drinker. I was worried sick last year thinking she wouldn’t fit in with uni life, I was very wrong. She has made lots of friends, some are non drinkers too and some drink, she has been out to a few night time events at clubs and had a great time without drink. Most of her socialising doesn’t involve anyone drinking and most the things she did at freshers week didn’t involve drink, there lots of non drinking activities.

My only advice is that it's absolutely fine not to drink but please make sure your DC aren't sour faced and judgy around others who do.

Sadly, the daughter of an acqaintance of mine did exactly this with her flatmates and so they ignored her and made her feel left out and miserable. She came home and restarted at a different university the following year.