So, how the hell do you afford uni for your kids?

[F0XCUB88]

Just been looking at prices for accommodation, £200 per week!

So looked at Money Saving Expert to see how much we need to contribute on top of loans. It says we need to save £358 per month.

We earn £50,000 between us, mortgage payment just went up by £££ and now can't actually get to the end of the month so how do we save £358?

Do we just say no she can't go? What do other people do?

I know it's a first world problem but she's really bright. Neither of us went to uni and finding it all a bit confusing. I just can't see that everyone else can afford it?

Both our teens lived at home while at university, our closest city is 9miles away and has 4 universities so it seemed sensible, means they can come out of their degrees with minimal debt.

All their friends bar 1 live at home throughout their time at university.

If your combined income is over 60k your dc can only borrow 4.5k a year for living costs. As average first year accommodation is about 6k that gives the parents an extra 1.5k to find, then money for food and expenses on top. So around 5k a year (which tops the loan up to the maximum loan. This doesn't change even if you have more than one at uni at the same time

@Emotionalstorm ah you are really working with people out of the ark.
Your three days will change to five as your DC grows.
You have to ask for change. I spent my career fighting. It paid off. I was one of the highest paid females in my industry. Why not try a northern firm for better opportunities? There's a big one in Leeds.
I hope this thread has given you plenty to think about. I now spend a lot of my energy on disabled rights. Perhaps I will work pro bono.
She who does nothing, changes nothing.

And on that note I must go to work!

You wouldn't start as a grad though. You'd start as a woman with 6/7 years experience. 30 is still pretty young. Are you a lawyer? In house counsel seems a popular route. if you're in HR you can literally work anywhere.

I've just done some research looking at how young people choose a university and there are increasing numbers choosing to live at home. Covid hasn't helped either as moving away feels riskier as the students remember the things they saw on the news.

Universities are aware of these changes and some are looking at what they can do to support 'commuter' students and ensure they have a positive experience but it's challenging.

Good luck to you all OP - you can do this and so can she. You and she might find this society useful. https://www.93percent.club/. It's got some useful info about first generation students, bursaries etc, and other cultural and networking help for people (like me) who didn't have the family culture to know what the hell they're doing with university stuff or know lots of people from school already. This won't be the first time it crops up but there are ways of making it easier now.

There's also no reason she can't get a job that suits her skills. She should try some temping agencies for office/IT work or this type of thing. https://www.studentjob.co.uk/

@F0XCUB88 do encourage the spreadsheet for your DD. My youngest had a huge spreadsheet which covered course, accommodation, cost of living, offer grades etc etc. It helped her to focus down on the places she really wanted.

If you/she go to open days only look at accommodation in your price bracket. It's a bit like not looking at houses you can't afford!

My DDs ended up in Nottingham and Sheffield respectively. Both less expensive cities to live in and, for us, good train routes.

Looking at apprenticeships on gov.uk to see what's available generally might be a good idea, and it doesn't have to be a degree apprenticeship. My eldest did her A-levels last year, got ABB, so could have got a uni place but didn't want to go and is doing a level 4 finance apprenticeship at a local tech company instead. It's 3 years, at the end of which she'll have work experience, finance and business qualifications, no debt, and probably a job. She's earning 17K a year and they pay her travel expenses. This time last year we had no idea this was possible but it's been brilliant for her (she's also SEN, severely dyspraxic and socially very awkward). She has college one day a week and then a mix of work from home/office. It's been amazing for her confidence.

There will be a range of accommodation options. There will also be higher apprenticeships to do it cheaper. Also have a look at scholarships and see what she might qualify for as that can be an easy grand or two a year. Finally, remember uni is half the year so plenty of time to work.

This.
we topped our 2dc maintenance to tune of £5000k per year. Some of that came form a small fund their grandparents had made very kindly, a lot came form reduction in costs we’d have paid while they were at school and rest was genuinely additional costs on top of what we’d typically spent each year on them during school age. I think it was just under £2000 addiotnal costs.

One thing we did was sat down with each dc during summer hols and did a precise budget for their maintenance costs. We’d know their hall fees/rent by then, we agreed other bills, groceries including food, basic clothing costs (to ensure they replaced holes socks and undies😱🤣), study materials, phones (we would pay for pay gas you go sims - if they wanted flash phone contracts they had to find money for it- partly cos they had history of loosing phones 🤦‍♀️), and other essentials.

everything else like booze, gaming, music including festivals, holidays and non basic clothing they had to fund from working. In practice though we gave them a lot of things like holiday and clothing through birthdays and Xmas. We liked paying for stuff like contribution to music festivals for birthdays rather than just giving them money to spend on booze.

it worked out fine but was a belt tightening time- no holidays or non essential spends for us parents. They managed and it incentivised them to get some work in holidays - but some students do not have timetables with a lot of free times to work as they’re studying - STEM subjects, practical courses like medicine, pharmacy so be careful assuming they can do this at any serious level to support themselves. Mine did a little bit of casual stuff during term times but focused on summer hols to get work. We didn’t want to force them to work in term time due to concerns it would effect their studies - students may not have lectures/tutorials all the time and “free” time a plenty in their timetables- but that should be for self led study . Uni courses are not normally part time - they’re usually, if done properly, more hours than a normal job .

in fairness neither of mine asked for or needed a raise in their budget for their 3 year under grad degree. They just managed but inflation was very low then (eg 3-4 years ago). I think we’d been generous in first year, and they’d got used to budgeting by then. My youngest did ask for a “raise” when he went on to do his masters which was fair enough. He could show us why he needed it and came to our annual discussion prepared 😉

yep, it is difficult time to find the money financially. Try to start to save something now . People saying taking a year out for them to earn before starting is a good shout and definitely encourages independence and understanding financially and gives them time to really think if their choice of degree and uni is right one before they commit finally. but then you’ve probably got to support them in that extra year so they can save, so it’s pretty much swings and roundabouts in my view.

As well as fewer companies caring, many are recruiting “blind” (including banks, not sure about Law) so the University is becoming much less critical for the best grad job schemes.

I would add , though, we did pay more in final year and months post grad. We’d not accounted for support with paying for graduation event (gown hire, suits, accommodation as their rental accommodation was long finished by then) costs for travel to job interviews up and down the country, them living at home for a few weeks post grad before they started work, and giving them money to rental deposit when they started work- eldest was in London and needed a massive deposit plus 2 months rent in advance- a ridiculous sum which thankfully landlords can’t do all of now. They also had to pay for agents fees back then- what a scam again thankfully outlawed now
so, worth saving for that too- we had not taken any of that into account and was a bit of a nasty surprise. 😱

Yes I'm a lawyer. I'm afraid I'm not an employment lawyer. I'm a restructuring lawyer so I'd be going to a PE fund or some kind of bank neither of which sound very appealing.

We'll be in the same position in a couple of years. We're on the same income as you with both of us working full time. I loved uni and it was amazing to be in another city but for us, I think we'll have to look at limiting our kids to going to a uni in Wales (as that's financially a better option for us as it's where we live), I really want them to not live at home but not sure how we could make that happen. Same as you, our mortgage and energy bills have eaten up every last penny so we can't save anything and I'm selling what I can on vinted and whatever just to keep our heads above water. I had a job all the way through uni but it won't touch the sides with those accommodation costs. It obviously can't be a full time job and had to fit around lectures, seminars, tutorials. And the stuff at uni that really got me my jobs were the volunteering, teaching workshops in schools, having a radio show, committees and student politics. Anyway, I don't think I've been much help other than to say I totally understand your panic and dismay. The world is unfair AF at the moment. I feel like such a failure that I can't give my kids what my parents gave me. I also know that not all people should go to uni but my sons are both really academic with eyes set on careers that require a certain level of education. We're looking at e.g. URNU as an option - the armed forces support university students who train with them and you're paid for the training you do. I can't remember the details.

Honestly it's totally doable and computer science is a great choice for earning power.

I would suggest this:

• tuition fees covered by student loan so don't worry about it
• accommodation: if it's 40 weeks that's 8k / year. So need to find 2k on top of maintenance loan. 1k / year from your £4.5k savings
• insist she gets a summer job before starting. If she earns £1000pcm for 2-3 months in the summer that is more than enough to cover the rent shortfall and have a bit left over. (As someone who was quite anxious and awkward as a teen, I actually found working in a shop / cafe really helpful - lots of short, fairly scripted social interactions with customers, the odd bit of conflict resolution and colleagues who actually liked me!)
• you contribute what you can - her current pocket money plus a bit more?
• have a serious conversation about budgeting with her and help her to work out a plan. She sounds fairly sensible though!

If she does a technical subject like computer science, there are loads of paid summer internships available with companies (very well paid) or research labs (less well paid but still good), which she should be able to apply for. Some are only open to second years and above, but some will also take first years. So if she is able to manage financially for the first year, the next two will be easier and she will also be getting relevant work experience that will help her find a job when she graduates.

Loans and they need to work.

Dh never had any parent help in uni. Just took out student loans and worked in all holidays/bit during term time.

I worked FT for at least 2 years of uni and did PT course/stretched out course to take extra modules during the summer. I did some national service/volunteering that meant at the end I was awarded a £2000 stipend.

It is absolutely shit isn't it @F0XCUB88 ??? It's going to come to a time shortly (with everything going up so much including peoples monthly mortgage payments,) where university is only going to be for the people who are very well off financially... OR for young people from families who are on very low income or benefits who get full bursaries and full help.

The children from the 'squeezed middle' are not going to be able to go as they won't have the funds. Because they won't get financial help as their parents are classed as having too much income. But these same (squeezed middle) parents cannot afford to pay anything, as they're brassick.

Our kids now in their late 20s - and a year and a half apart in age - both went to university 10-12 years ago, and we were on a very low income at the time. DH was only working 26 hours a week, (had had his hours cut at work,) and I was only working 16 and we had quite a high rent at the time (private let,) so had no surplus income so they got ALL the help. They got full bursary/full grant etc, and the room that they were staying in was actually only about £80 a week at the time ...

And they also got part time jobs like 8 to 10 hours a week to top of their income - so they were absolutely fine. These days, the accommodation is much more expensive, and peoples outgoings are higher with increased mortgage payments and everything else costing more like food, petrol, household items etc...

We're on a higher income now, although not massive - a middle income type of thing - and are in social housing, so the rent is much cheaper... So we would have to pay something towards it now. If we had to do it now, WE would struggle too. I'm so so glad that they're not at university now - especially with having 2 close together. I feel really sorry for the young adults who want to go to university now, (and their parents too.) It must be sooo difficult.

I'm sorry I have absolutely no suggestions for you other than she gets a job at whilst at university to support her income, OR she doesn't go, OR you try and increase your own income. All not great suggestions sorry ... I don't envy you, and I wish you well.

Basically, there is no easy answer to this. As other posters have said, many MANY parents are shocked at what they have to fork out for when their child goes to uni. Even though we didn't have to fork out for uni fees and accommodation for our 2, we still had to fork out for the first month's rent and the deposit on the room in Halls, and also for all the stuff they needed like bed linen, duvets, pillows, towels, cutlery, crockery, and a few other items for the kitchen and bathroom. We were taken aback by the cost for all that. Having to pay towards accommodation and student fees on top would have been horrific.

I have stability and comfort without earning £200k or whatever.

I also don't have huge commutes, my kids weren't in childcare from 8am-6pm+, I had no stress, no meetings that I had to attend, no longer work days.

Sure we didn't own a new range rover, or live in a 4 bed detached house in Surrey and go on 4 holidays a year to the south of France etc. But we had a modest home, DS got to go on adventures and we had a car that got us around, I had a local flexible job as he was growing up, so could easily collect him from school if ill, go to sports days etc, drop him off at scout camp etc

Halls used to be seen as the cheaper option but a private house share seems to be cheaper where we are. DS is sharing with 2 others and pays £330 per month. Student accommodation would've been £200-250 per week. It is a 12 month contract though and he pays extra for bills, but not much.

Mid 6-figures? So...there are multiple Hull graduates earning 500,000 pounds aged 27 in IT?

I find that tremendously hard to believe.

IT Sales. IT itself would be more like 100K. But still, the point being that nobody cares where your degree is from in IT or tech firms that I have ever seen in the UK in recent years.

You do need a degree for the jobs I am referencing though.

And remember, I am talking about the one who were particulary successful / good at the job. But agian, the point is, where they got their degree was not a direct factor in this. Even the less stellar people will be on good incomes in late twenties - I can't think of a single one who started on our grad scheme that hasn't bought or about to buy a property. I find that incredible in the current climate.

I don't know anyone who paid their kids to go to uni, thats what loans are for.

But if your parents earn over a certain amount, you only qualify for the minimum loan. It is expected that your parents top it up. You can’t simply choose to borrow as much as you need!

Even if you get the maximum loan you are going to be struggling at a lot of places these days.

I can only assume Shiny doesn't know anyone whose children went to university recently.