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Higher education

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Original poster

Advice on attending graduation day

46 replies

LoveBeingAMum555 · 24/06/2023 19:32

Hi

Our eldest son has his graduation in a few weeks. I am clueless about this and dont really have anyone to ask. I guess from photos that I have seen on social media that smart dress is required on the day, and I have said that we will get booked in at a restaurant afterwards.

What else do I need to know? Any tips or advice from those who have done this before?

OP posts:
marriednotdead · 24/06/2023 19:49

There's a LOT of hanging about with no guarantee of sustenance!
With that in mind, take plenty of snacks/sandwiches/drinks which you can eat without making too much mess.
Make sure your footwear is comfortable, you may be standing for a long time. You can wear what you like although many people dress up a bit and you may have an opportunity for photos.
I've attended 3 times and each time the shoes have got flatter and the food supplies bigger!

PresentingPercy · 24/06/2023 20:09

We did not take any food - just water. Not a huge amount of standing around, except at the drinks reception. We got our seats in good time and just went with the flow. I wore a smart summer day dress with fairly sensible shoes and a decent bag with tissues in it!

ApolloandDaphne · 24/06/2023 20:14

If it's only in a few weeks you might struggle to get booked for a meal. They tend to get booked up way in advance.

Stichintime · 24/06/2023 20:17

I cried, a lot. Plentiful food and drink provided at reception.

Thelondonone · 24/06/2023 20:19

We went out for dinner with my parents and my mates parents the night before and afterwards. My parents went back to the hotel and me and my mates went to a graduation party.

HeddaGarbled · 24/06/2023 20:20

The dress code will be very different at different universities.

There will be lots of things you may want to buy (official photo of their moment on stage, official family photos, video of the ceremony, sweatshirt with the names of all the graduates) and these will all be 4 times more expensive than you would expect.

RattyHealy · 24/06/2023 20:38

In my experience the only standing around

RattyHealy · 24/06/2023 20:39

Ffs! The only standing around was the drinks afterwards and there certainly wasn't time to eat a packed lunch! 😄

Families went for lunch after then the graduates all went off to get drunk.

VanCleefArpels · 25/06/2023 10:11

Double check the time of the ceremony - they tend to pack them in each day!

Your celebratory meal might be better the day before or after : the whole thing takes longer than you think esp as the kids want to get photos with all their mates etc. you don’t want to be watching the clock and hurrying them away

Make sure your student actually applies for tickets - this requires monitoring of emails!

Check parking arrangements if you are driving- if you need a public carpark nearby do your research and even book ahead if possible as there’s nothing worse than going round in circles in an unfamiliar city trying to find a carpark.

comfy shoes, especially if a lot of walking/standing on grass

RampantIvy · 25/06/2023 10:48

Check the size of the venue. Ceremonies in larger venues last longer. DD was at Newcastle, and the hall wasn't too legs so the ceremony was less than an hour. Ceremonies in cathedrals go on for ever as they can fit more people in.

Dress code at Newcastle was smart cadual. I didn't see anyone in jeans.

Original poster
LoveBeingAMum555 · 25/06/2023 21:24

Thanks all, that is so helpful. DSs graduation is at 4pm so I think we will go out for lunch early somewhere nearby then let him go to the pub with his mates after. Good tip about working out the logistics of actually getting there too.

I am planning my outfit around my footwear! And I will need a lot of tissues. We have tickets, so that's sorted.

OP posts:
2gorgeousboys · 25/06/2023 21:28

Just make sure your DS checks timings as last year DS had to be there two hours before the ceremony for gown and cap collection, photos. You don't want to book lunch and then find he has to dash away.

RampantIvy · 25/06/2023 21:43

2gorgeousboys · 25/06/2023 21:28

Just make sure your DS checks timings as last year DS had to be there two hours before the ceremony for gown and cap collection, photos. You don't want to book lunch and then find he has to dash away.

I agree with this. We had thought about doing lunch as DD's graduation was at a similar time, but she was so nervous and wanted to be able to relax afterwards.

She didn't enoy her graduation. She hates being the centre of attention, and couldn't wait for it to be over. It was the last ceremony of the day, and the drinks afterwards were a bit of a damp squib. None of the staff from her faculty attended the ceremony or the drinks afterwards, and it all felt like a bit of an anticlima TBH.

SpikyHatePotato · 25/06/2023 22:18

Make sure your DS has registered for the graduation, has booked ticket for all his guests, has booked his gown and photography.

If the ceremony is 4pm, chances are it's the third on the day at the venue. The gown supplier will open for handing out gowns for your ceremony at a stated time - probably 2 hours before, but check this carefully. Your DS should get instructions from the University on when to arrive - most require graduands to sign in and collect their tickets before getting their gown, and the gowning staff will send your DS away if he hasn't.

There will be queues! Queues to register/get tickets, queues to pick up the gown and then to get it put on, queues for photography. It's a good idea to do your photographs before the ceremony, as the queue afterwards is even longer.

The University will probably have a time when you have to be seated, and everything has to be done before that. Generally late arrivals get chucked in a gown, and added on to the very end of the ceremony - they don't get to sit/cross the stage with their course group.

(I do gowning/ceremonies work for Ede and Ravenscroft)

VanCleefArpels · 26/06/2023 07:16

Totally agree that lunch before a 4pm ceremony will be tight given the general faffing re gowns and photos. Definitely get your group photos done before the ceremony. Brunch might be a better bet or dinner the night before

ItsWorkNotAParty · 26/06/2023 08:05

If you are going from home make sure he has packed correctly. We had a lovely stroll around the town, dinner and relaxing drinks with our DS the evening before. Up early for a morning ceremony only to discover that he had forgotten to pack a shirt. So, no leisurely breakfast and walk in the sunshine but a mad sweaty dash around town. The only place open before 9am was M&S food hall which luckily had the children's clothes section. So he ended up going in a school shirt that was miles too small. It still makes me laugh looking at his graduation photos where he has no shirt cuffs visible because they were halfway up his arms! It was a bit stressful at the time though!

blobby10 · 26/06/2023 09:06

I've been through two graduations - Take plenty of water and be prepared for lots of hanging around.

Tips: We had a professional photo of the graduate with both parents so I wore a nice outfit but I wished the second time that I had checked in the mirror before leaving home as I really needed control underwear on! Fortunately the photographer didn't take full length pics of us on this occasion! The photo area will be hot due to lights so if you sweat take remedies.

The ceremony will be long and your hands will get sore from clapping so don't be too enthusiastic early on. Try not to fall asleep as the head honcho drones on - depending on whether its day 1 or 2 or a morning or afternoon ceremony, they will have repeated this speech several times over already! They do several courses at a time so you will be sitting there for a long time for your child to do their 2 seconds on the stage.

For the graduate, get in the queue for gown collection asap as it takes about 5 minutes to gown each person. If you can, wear something that can be pinned (males have it easier as they can hook the gown on a shirt button!) - at my daughters gown collection the staff were so frustrated as the females had gone for the strappy silky dress look so nowhere to secure the gowns Grin. Don't book somewhere to eat too soon after the ceremony ends as if your child is anything like mine were, they will spend an age getting selfies with staff and fellow graduates and probably disappear at one point to 'return the gown' only reappearing an hour later after 'doing casual photos over in the gardens'!!

Have fun, take every opportunity to be the proud mum Grin

RuthW · 26/06/2023 09:20

Get there early. There is lots to do first like gown fitting and official photos. If you go for lunch first you may miss this.

Most unis do a park and ride.

Wear something like a smart day dress and comfy shoes.

Lots of drinks and some snacks. We needed lunch. It's an all day job. Book a table after at a nice restaurant but at this late stage you may have yo go further afield.

Xenia · 26/06/2023 12:32

I have done 5 (5 children). The last 2 were in April last year a week apart at Bristol (twins) and were delayed to 2022 even though they graduated in 2020 but there were lockdowns. In some ways that made it all the more special. They both chose to buy sweat shirts and I would definitely recommend they pay for the official graduation portrait. There tends to be a process where you hire the gown etc and collect it first that day which takes a bit of time and queue for the photo - then you rejoin parents after all that so allow a couple of hours for that rigmarole. People tend to dress up - parents etc. My sons wore a suit and tie which was pretty standard wear for the boys.

I also bought the video of graduations. You can order before or after.

One of our latest was 4pm so we drove to Bristol for the day. The other was the first session early on in a different week so we had a night in a hotel the night before. We did not do a meal after for the latest ones as they did things with friends, even where we had prebooked I cancelled as it was just not going to be worth waiting around nor nice for them to have a time constraint. We also went to a nice geography dept reception after one of the events

Another issue is tickets. We have always managed to get extra seats on the day over and above the 2 you get in advance. They have a desk at Bristol anyway on the day where if you are early enough you can pick up spare tickets for more family members.

Good luck and do have a good day.

Pootles34 · 26/06/2023 13:18

Make your son read his emails! The admin staff will have sent out very detailed instructions on how the day will work, but the students like to ignore them ...

RampantIvy · 26/06/2023 14:27

Pootles34 · 26/06/2023 13:18

Make your son read his emails! The admin staff will have sent out very detailed instructions on how the day will work, but the students like to ignore them ...

Second this ^^
DD's university emailed the parents with the details as well.

Abra1t · 26/06/2023 14:39

You will open the official programme and realise that there are approximately 2000 graduates to clap before your own child comes on. It will be exciting when some of your child's friends are called, but then the novelty wears off.

You won't need food unless you can't manage more than a few hours without it or you haven't booked a table before or after. There's usually something to eat.

Smart enough clothes for the photos but not garden-party smart. We are supporting roles, not stars.

SoWhatEh · 26/06/2023 14:40

PresentingPercy · 24/06/2023 20:09

We did not take any food - just water. Not a huge amount of standing around, except at the drinks reception. We got our seats in good time and just went with the flow. I wore a smart summer day dress with fairly sensible shoes and a decent bag with tissues in it!

This in itself is informative. I had no idea there was a drinks reception!

Do you have to buy tickets?
Are you told where to go?
I am as clueless as OP. All I know is the date. I'm hoping DS knows where to hire a gown etc from.

VanCleefArpels · 26/06/2023 14:44

SoWhatEh · 26/06/2023 14:40

This in itself is informative. I had no idea there was a drinks reception!

Do you have to buy tickets?
Are you told where to go?
I am as clueless as OP. All I know is the date. I'm hoping DS knows where to hire a gown etc from.

Show quote history

Drinks etc will vary between unis, it’s not a given - we’ve had one with a full on garden party afterwards and another with nothing at all after the ceremony

AgeingDoc · 26/06/2023 15:01

Graduations are in the most part very dull. I didn't plan to attend my first one as I knew it would be deadly boring but my parents wanted to go as my brother hadn't attended his and we are the first generation of our family to go to University. So I relented on the condition that I didn't have to have my photograph taken. I was right, it was spectacularly tedious - my parents acknowledged that afterwards - and I didn't go to my second one. There is a lot of standing around waiting whilst nothing in particular happens and then a long time in a hall watching hundreds, possibly thousands of people walk across a stage, and listening to some fairly formulaic speeches
I have told my children they can either go to their graduations or have what we would have spent on tickets, travel, gown hire etc as cash instead. I hope suspect both my sons will take the money and run.My DD went to hers though but fortunately it was a small specialist college so it was quite personal, over pretty quickly and not too bad. There was a buffet provided as part of the ticket price afterwards which was quite nice but we went out for a proper meal afterwards anyway. I would agree this needs to be booked well in advance as good places will be snapped up. Otherwise my top tips would be don't go wear comfy shoes and take something to drink and a good book.