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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Are graduation presents a ‘thing’?

35 replies

Pleasedontdothat · 18/09/2022 14:01

Ds1 has finally graduated (it’s taken him 7 years, don’t ask ..) We were planning to take him and his girlfriend out for a nice dinner after his graduation ceremony and a token ‘starting out in the adult world’ gift but we’re not sure what would be appropriate or expected. When I graduated my parents took me out for dinner and I got congratulations cards from my grandparents but that was about it..any thoughts?

OP posts:
PurpleBlis · 18/09/2022 14:01

No they are not a thing in the UK

user1487194234 · 18/09/2022 19:31

I would say they definitely are
I got one when I graduated in the early 90s

bruffin · 18/09/2022 19:35

PurpleBlis · 18/09/2022 14:01

No they are not a thing in the UK

How would you know?

DD graduated last year and we bought her a necklace with connections to where she went to uni. Will buy something for DS if he finally graduates in a few years time.

Dreikanter · 18/09/2022 20:18

We had a family dinner in a great restaurant and gave DS a watch of his choice (not Rolex territory though).

Coybubbles · 18/09/2022 20:19

i seem to remember getting taken out for a big family meal at a nice restaurant and being given some money.

PenYGore · 18/09/2022 20:20

user1487194234 · 18/09/2022 19:31

I would say they definitely are
I got one when I graduated in the early 90s

I graduated in the early 90s and got absolutely nothing!

Triffid1 · 18/09/2022 20:22

What's appropriate is entirely up to you ans your family?! I never understand these questions - if you want to buy a gift for your ds, you go right ahead and get him something according to your preference and budget. Or you just take him for a nice meal. Who cares what everyone else might be doing?

Augend23 · 18/09/2022 20:22

I got a teddy bear in my university colours if that counts...

SpringIntoChaos · 18/09/2022 20:31

When mine graduated (8 and 5 years ago) they got taken out for a lovely dinner...I thought that was what we did in the UK 🤣

It was what most of their friends parents did with their children at the time too, as I recall. It wasn't that long ago...surely things can't have change too drastically! 🤦‍♀️

Dreikanter · 18/09/2022 20:39

When I graduated (in the 80s and the 90s) I didn’t get anything from my parents other than graduating with no debt. The second time my older sister gave me a hard shell briefcase (which did actually come in useful).

ginslinger · 18/09/2022 20:51

I graduated in the 80s - no present but had a dinner

TizerorFizz · 19/09/2022 08:59

So this DS is now 25. A fairly late intro to the adult world. A decent night out seems appropriate. Thanking God it’s all over?

chesirecat99 · 19/09/2022 17:35

Small commemorative graduation gifts seem to be a thing at my DC's universities eg cufflinks or earrings to wear for the graduation ceremony that will be a reminder of their achievement when they wear them in the future.

Hawkins001 · 19/09/2022 17:38

@Pleasedontdothat in America, sometimes it's e.g. A car, cruise ect, depends on the parents preferences

HeadacheEarthquake · 19/09/2022 17:38

They definitely are a thing.

sorrynotathome · 19/09/2022 17:40

No but I did pay for DC’s degree, tuition and living costs. That’s quite a good present.

JudgeRindersMinder · 19/09/2022 17:41

user1487194234 · 18/09/2022 19:31

I would say they definitely are
I got one when I graduated in the early 90s

Me too, at a similar time, my parents gave me a gold bracelet which I still wear

blobby10 · 19/09/2022 17:42

After paying a small fortune for dinner and the official photos plus travel to London for the day I couldn’t afford to buy my DS anything! And I’ve just paid even more of a fortune for DD gown and stuff so she won’t get anything either! X

Ginisatonic · 19/09/2022 17:44

We took ours out for cocktails and dinner after they graduated. My SIL bought them a small item of jewellery, but she is American, so maybe more of a thing there.
We spent a small fortune supporting them both through university. I know they were both grateful for that because not all their friends had support. So that was the gift.

Blanketpolicy · 19/09/2022 17:49

Not a thing ime, either in my family, friends circle or work colleagues. Nice meal out to celebrate is the usual. If you want to do a gift though, it doesnt need to be a thing to do it.

Original poster
Pleasedontdothat · 19/09/2022 17:50

@Hawkins001 I rather fear this is the kind of thing he has in mind, whereas I’m more in the nice meal and cuff links area ….

@TizerorFizz we didn’t actually believe it would ever happen so extremely thankful it’s all over!

Thanks everyone - we do want to mark the occasion in some way but frankly he’s had a lot of support since he left school, financial and otherwise so something like a car or large amount of cash is just not happening. I just wanted to gauge what’s the norm at UK universities now. His girlfriend’s family is originally from Poland and her parents have a very different attitude towards presents in general which makes things tricky.

OP posts:
Hawkins001 · 19/09/2022 17:54

@Pleasedontdothat all the best and positivity

fortifiedwithtea · 19/09/2022 18:03

I don’t care if its a thing or not I am 100% going to spoil my DD1 on her graduation. She’s 24 and saving for her first home. I’m buying her the fancy pants food processor she has her eye on.

Its been a long hard slog. She’s worked bloody hard in difficult circumstances.

VoyageInTheDark · 19/09/2022 18:06

I graduated in the 00s and my mum asked me what I wanted as a present so I asked for ghd hair straighteners! Still got them.

gogohmm · 19/09/2022 18:10

Took dd and dsd out for dinner.