Academic advice for dyslexic/ ADD teen starting uni in Sept?

[NormaSnorks]

So DS has firmed his place for uni in September and the reality of it is now sinking in - for me at least!

He is a young, fairly naive 18 year old with dyslexia and lots of ADD traits and challenges.

He did well in his A levels (has had a gap year) but he got a lot of support from both his teachers and me to make sure he kept on track etc. I think the jump to uni level learning is going to be massive and difficult for him and I'm really worried he is going to completely flounder.

The problem is that he doesn't have great self-awareness of his problems or limitations - he "doesn't know what he doesn't know" so tends not to seek out help until he's in a blind panic.

Anyone have any experience/ advice?

He should contact disability services at his university if he hasn’t already — they will point him in the direction of what support, equipment etc is available, and liaise with his academic department.

Absolutely, contact the disability service of his university as soon as possible. They are the only ones who can put in place adjustments, the teaching staff can't (but obviously implement the adjustments). Too many students try to tough it out and then panic before exam time, when it can be too late to put things in place.

@Chemenger

Absolutely, contact the disability service of his university as soon as possible. They are the only ones who can put in place adjustments, the teaching staff can't (but obviously implement the adjustments). Too many students try to tough it out and then panic before exam time, when it can be too late to put things in place.

Yes, exactly. It happens every year that someone doesn’t make contact with disability services until they’re already behind on five assignments, struggling badly, and about to hit the exam period, and as meetings, adjustments, liaising with academic departments all take time to set up, it’s often too late. The absolute best thing your son can do is get in contact ASAP and follow up/act on their referrals etc.

How do disability support services work? Do they rely on the students approaching them for help once they're registered, or would there be any regular 'checking up' and review meetings scheduled.
Some of DS's main issues are planning, time management, executive function etc

Academic here. As pps above, your son should contact disability services to ensure the right support is in place and so that the appropriate adjustments can be made. It is also important to engage with assigned personal tutor and module leaders for advice and support once the course starts. A close family member was in exactly the same position and found that taking a foundation year really helped in many ways. It boosted her confidence as key course material was covered and the year was spent adjusting to university life - particularly the practical aspects of living away from home. This is an option that does work well for many going to uni - there should still be time to consider this an an option. That said, you and your son know the particulars of his situation best and should only do what feels right.

Is he officially diagnosed with dyslexia and ADD? This can make a difference in terms of the formal support he can access and it would be worth looking in to it now.

Since he presumably knows which university he is going to attend, you can contact disability / wellbeing support services there now for advice. For example, we require 'a comprehensive diagnostic assessment completed by a qualified assessor with the practicing certificate' before a student can access support from SpLD advisors, and it obviously takes time to get this if you don't already have it.

When the student starts university, they arrange a meeting with disability / wellbeing services, and (once they have an official diagnosis) together they produce a plan identifying any support needs, reasonable adjustments and so on that the student needs on an ongoing basis. They can also help with applying for DLA, which they need to get if they want ongoing one-to-one support.

Their disability is flagged on their student record so that their personal tutor can see it, and they should discuss any reasonable ongoing support they need. If they don't have a plan in place with disability services by their first meeting with their personal tutor, they should arrange a meeting or attend an office hour to discuss the plan. Some departments will also have a member of staff with specific responsibility for student wellbeing and they might arrange a meeting with him, or he can ask for a meeting with them.

We can also see if a student in any of our classes has a disability marker, but it is largely up to the student to approach individual academics for support for specific courses / modules over and above the support offered by their personal tutor or disability services. Staff should be aware of what support they are and are not allowed to offer.

For students with, e.g. dyslexia, there is also a system for stickering their essays and other written work to indicate that this should be taken into account in marking.

I would work with him now to help him to put together an explanation of what his specific challenges are and what support would be helpful to him. Our emphasis is very much on putting a plan together right from the beginning covering any anticipated issues that might arise, so that there is a support structure around the student from day one. Having to firefight issues as they arise is almost always problematic and much more difficult to do.

Thank you - some really helpful advice here.

Yes - he has a formal diagnosis of dyslexia/SpLD and I've been in contact with the person who did it and it's still valid and she is appropriately qualified.

I know I have probably been a bit helicopter parent on this to date, but I'm having real problems getting DS to recognise and acknowledge the problems he has, and how they are related to his dyslexia. He normalises the fact that he misses or forgets to reply to important emails, or doesn't know where to look for a course syllabus, or forgets that he has been sent information 3 times. If I try to suggest that he needs to develop organisational strategies he takes it all personally as me "having a go at him" (I'm really not!).
It's painful to see him trying to navigate emails from the university, for example, and extract the key information. He would probably have missed today's UCAS deadline if I hadn't mentioned it.

If you go on to the university website you should be able to find information there about the disability service. If at all possible I would suggesting getting in touch before the start of term.

@NormaSnorks

Thank you - some really helpful advice here.

Yes - he has a formal diagnosis of dyslexia/SpLD and I've been in contact with the person who did it and it's still valid and she is appropriately qualified.

I know I have probably been a bit helicopter parent on this to date, but I'm having real problems getting DS to recognise and acknowledge the problems he has, and how they are related to his dyslexia. He normalises the fact that he misses or forgets to reply to important emails, or doesn't know where to look for a course syllabus, or forgets that he has been sent information 3 times. If I try to suggest that he needs to develop organisational strategies he takes it all personally as me "having a go at him" (I'm really not!).
It's painful to see him trying to navigate emails from the university, for example, and extract the key information. He would probably have missed today's UCAS deadline if I hadn't mentioned it.

This could be my son to a tee! My DS has just finished his first year and like you I had to be a helicopter parent just to get him through the last few years (6th Form / Foundation Year). I did however step back and allowed him to navigate his own way through his first year which he was so keen to do. That has gone horrendously to say the least! He thought he had done what was required / thought he had replied / thought he had support in place but basically didn't! We applied at Student Finance England for Disability Support but I then expected him to tell me that he received an email explaining what was needed to be done next. He received the email but never followed it through although once again thought he had, told me he had! Once I finally realised what was happening, I intervened (by this stage he was so depressed by missing deadlines etc - although obviously online learning and no actual physical support played a part). Now I am copied into all his university emails - every single one as well as I can update this online calendar and are in direct contact with the head of his course and tutors. He is actually changing his course (as the one he accepted last year was cancelled due to covid) which is also a clean slate for him. So my absolute top tip is to get involved right from the start - you know your son's limits with regard to organisation - it is no a reflection on his ability and it won't take away his independence, if anything it will allow him to focus on his learning and to feel confident about himself. I also find the uni staff extremely supportive once they understood his limitations.

He is my 4th child to go to university and I have had no need to get involved with their learning ever before which lulled me somewhat but I can't emphasis enough - if your child needs support in this way, it is best to just get involved, they really won't change over night!

He received the email but never followed it through although once again thought he had, told me he had!

You could ask your son to set his uni email up so that emails are automatically forwarded to you.

Students not reading uni emails is normal across the board.

Creating a Gantt chart with every module, project and activity included over the academic year will help time management and prevent missed deadlines.

@Etulosba

He received the email but never followed it through although once again thought he had, told me he had!

You could ask your son to set his uni email up so that emails are automatically forwarded to you.

Students not reading uni emails is normal across the board.

Creating a Gantt chart with every module, project and activity included over the academic year will help time management and prevent missed deadlines.

Yes we are doing that now, although I wish I knew that when he first started... It was never mentioned and as I've said he's the 4th! I will however do the Gantt chart idea, so thanks for that idea, he will welcome that!

You could ask your son to set his uni email up so that emails are automatically forwarded to you.

Yes, you definitely need access to his emails. The son of a friend of mine sounds just like yours. She had to monitor his emails and remind him about deadlines and other important dates.

OP here - popping back.

@zazas - interesting to hear your experience, thanks! You see, this is exactly what I am worried about - that DS will flounder terribly, but will not even realise he is floundering until it is too late.

I'm in two minds about the email thing though. How will he ever begin to take responsibility for himself and learn coping strategies if he always knows I am checking his email to make sure he doesn't fail.
It's so hard. DS currently forwards any remotely serious-looking emails to me and I've spent the last year telling him I only want him to forward them with a quick oneliner about what he thinks he needs to do about it.

What hope is there for him in the future if he can't develop some of these executive function skills? He can't forward his emails when he starts work!

Just to be clear, I want to be supportive, but equally I need DS to transition to dealing with stuff himself.

How will he ever begin to take responsibility for himself and learn coping strategies if he always knows I am checking his email to make sure he doesn't fail.

I nearly commented on this when I read your opening post. I agree.

Universities try to help, but they won’t organise a student’s life for them. Nor will they chase missed seminars or deadlines. The only allowance students with difficulties get is more time, but they have to ask for it. They still have to do the work and it has to be to the same high standard as everybody else.

Time management is the biggest problem I see. In particular, becoming overwhelmed by bunched submission deadlines.

That is why I suggested creating a Gantt chart. Close deadlines can be identified early and steps taken to mitigate. Extensions can be used to spread the work, for example. However, they have to be applied for in good time. Care also needs to be taken to ensure that an extension will leave enough time to complete the next piece of work on time.

Parents initially helping a new student with this would not be a bad thing and may teach the student how to cope on their own later in their university career.

As an incentive, I have had some students who found it difficult to cope take six years to complete a four year course. I think one took seven.

@NormaSnorks

OP here - popping back.

@zazas - interesting to hear your experience, thanks! You see, this is exactly what I am worried about - that DS will flounder terribly, but will not even realise he is floundering until it is too late.

I'm in two minds about the email thing though. How will he ever begin to take responsibility for himself and learn coping strategies if he always knows I am checking his email to make sure he doesn't fail.
It's so hard. DS currently forwards any remotely serious-looking emails to me and I've spent the last year telling him I only want him to forward them with a quick oneliner about what he thinks he needs to do about it.

What hope is there for him in the future if he can't develop some of these executive function skills? He can't forward his emails when he starts work!

Just to be clear, I want to be supportive, but equally I need DS to transition to dealing with stuff himself.

Oh I completely understand! That was my approach when he started last October, to allow my DS to manage it himself and therefore learn to develop his own skills with regard to processing information. He was keen to do so too…I have now re thought my support of him.

We had explored his independence a bit when my DS did a Foundation Year 2019/2020. The tutors kept me in a loop to a degree, although he mostly managed to keep on top of everything - however the BIG difference being that he was seeing them nearly everyday and therefore conversations and support for him happened naturally - as he constantly asked for help - something he has no problem doing so when he is actually physically with people. Then there was covid and the remainder of the year was all online, although he did complete what was required of him.

It is worth noting that he did during this period miss a course trip to Barcelona as he forgot to follow up the form they gave to him to register for the trip and by the time he remembered it was too late. I thought that maybe this would be a good 'learning' experience to encourage him to be more aware of what was happening (I have to admit I was aware of the trip but was waiting to see if he would take the initiative to follow it up). All it did however was make himself feel upset which led him feeling a sense of unworthiness etc.

A long story short, his first year at university he has attempted to manage it all himself but he has basically been unable to. I was under the impression that he had signed up to Disability Services which he honestly thought he had as well. He was definitely getting some tutor support but it wasn't the dedicated Disability Support that he required. He is doing Fine Art, so a practical course but he has had no studio work this year, therefore no direct interaction with his tutors - the style of learning he flourishes best under.

I completely understand the need for him to learn how to manage himself and full credit to him he has developed so many skills to help him with this. He has alarms for everything so he remembers stuff, has tiles attached to his wallet, keys etc so he can track down what he looses, etc but it comes a quite a big cost to his sense of self esteem and mental health as he constantly feels that he is failing when he forgets or looses things.

So (together with his course leader) we have decided that the next academic year, that having me looped into his emails is just an extra element of support - not that he is no longer responsible for himself and his studying. I am not on the moodle system they use, so can't see what work has actually been set. But I do have a clearer idea of what is happening and will support him with timelines etc.

My thoughts are that he has a lot to manage already living independently - which he has done so far with varying degrees of success. Including managing new relationships, navigating a new city (he is in London), working part time etc etc etc. Therefore if I can be of help with regard to the most challenging part - supporting him with managing the workflow/timelines with regard to his degree, then I think this will ultimately provide him with the support he still requires at this stage in his life. I certainly can't do the work for him!

It is interesting that I employ quite a few staff who are also dyslexic and I also change my managing style to support them. We use communication platforms that enable them to consume the information easier and I encourage them to structure their workflow in a way that is logical to them. It is not without its frustrations at times but I try and look at the skills that they bring to their jobs and support them in the logistics of delivering them. Their skills far out weigh their sometimes lack of logistical approach to their work!

I think my experience with my DS this year (he did end up with serious mental health problems as it became so overwhelming for him to manage this online learning experience) has made me aware, that it is OK to support him with logistics, that it doesn’t mean he isn’t capable or won’t ever be fully independent, he just needs elements of support in his life, like someone with a physical disability. As long as he retains his sense of self worth and confidence in his ability to deliver what he can do well then I feel that ultimately he will be fine in the long term.

I am with you as a parent - it is not easy getting the balance right but I am 100% not going back to this past year and not supporting him where he needs it but also remaining optimistic that overtime he will develop further resources in order to find ways to support himself.

Following as a DS in almost exactly the same situation. Has totally floundered in year 1. Now trying to do summer catch up work. Wish I had intervened earlier.

OP have only skimmed thread but

Make sure he has a proper diagnosis.

Apply for DSA (Disabled Students' Allowance) - like I say, have only skimmed but not sure if you have done this?

If not, his university Disability Services will be able to advise on the app.

It can get your son things like 1:1 mentoring or study skills support to help him manage things.

Apart from that, do get in touch with the disability team. At my place, we organise meetings with parents and incoming students over the summer for issues like this.

Secondly at my institution, we wouldn't be in contact with you independently but it is v normal for students to set up a re direct from uni > gmail accts for themselves, so as others say, just have the emails directed to you.

Finally, if he is willing, if you have his log in you can access his uni system eg Moodle /DLE pages where much info is kept. That would also help you guide him.

Oh and really finally, make sure he enrols! The number who don't is astonishing. Our OLE (online enrolment) opens Aug 11 so it's coming up. That will help him get induction details, so at ours, that is a list of books or kit to buy plus where to be when in Sept. There may be activities before formal teaching starts so make sure to check.

My daughter with ADHD has just finished her second year and overall I think all has gone relatively well, but I think Covid has perhaps helped as she has boomeranged back and forth from home.

She is doing an arts subject so it’s all about essays. Hers are always late but she seems to get lots of extensions. She is registered with disability services so perhaps this helps ease the wheels.

Online lectures are truly a godsend as there’s no way she’d have got to the right place at the right time for in person ones. And she can stop and start them and watch multiple times.
And because of Covid she was doing her exams at home online where there are less distractions and I’m there to provide food and help her find all her lost essentials (laptop, charger etc).

I think she’s found the academic side easier than the social/living side. She frequently loses her door key and lives in a state of chaos and disorganisation which I think her housemates find difficult (as do we at home).

She is only 2 hours from home. If she was 7 hours away like one of her sisters it would never have worked.

I worry about her and despair sometimes!

I hope your son copes. You sound much more helpful/involved than I’ve been able to be and that will be a great asset.

For those of you with second years, how do you apply for the DSA year 2. And does another assessment take place? DS got various tutor support in year 1 via DSA but just couldn't engage online or build the trust. Really hoping Year 2 better on that front.

@Shells Disability Services should be able to help but I believe they do require up to date evidence so make sure everything is shipshape in that respect.

OK cheers. Will get on the case @JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff