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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

2017 seems so long ago, now they're fledgling graduates.

997 replies

latedecember1963 · 06/03/2021 17:31

4 years since A Levels and the wait for August and confirmation of where our chicks were about to fly the nest to.
It's been 4 years that has sprung a few surprises along the way, not least this lovely series of threads.

OP posts:
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11
bigTillyMint · 02/01/2022 15:59

@Needmoresleep, I feel like medics aren’t only in it for the money, whereas I don’t think there’s much vocation involved in jobs in the city!

Yes @Xenia, I am a bit worried for DS (if he manages to land a summer internship at the first stage) with 3 more years once he finishes his degree this summer. But if he wants to chase the money….. WinkSmile

Xenia · 03/01/2022 10:49

Yes, and it is similar with being a GP v NHS Consultant with large private practice - longer to get to the consultant position than being a GP but in some cases more money.

Needmoresleep · 03/01/2022 11:26

BigTilly, I think the realisation that DD will be well into her 30s before she stops taking exams and has a settled job has started to hit. She is less than half way through, with a lot of tough working and studying ahead.

She’s fine in that she is happy with medicine and it is what she has always wanted to do. However it is hard, and in some ways getting harder, and the drop out rate, including from the more academic universities, is significant. A surprising number seem to fall into medicine without really thinking out what it entails, and are finding it a slog. Perhaps because of parental encouragement, or because they see getting into medical school as competitive and prestigious. One doctor we know in his mid 30s, who was first generation to go to university, is unsure he can face another 25 years. He was good at science so his chemistry teacher told him to apply for medicine, which he did.. A lot of the camaraderie seems to have gone with the pressure on time and space. So he is mainly wfh, looking at scans etc, with patient contact severely curtailed. However the money and job security are good!

Unfortunately DDs preferred specialisation is competitive and will be at every turn. Getting a good elective, getting a suitable F1, getting a relevant training place, passing the exams. Ironically there is then a shortage so if she gets through, progression to registrar and consultant is much more straightforward. But it is still far from certain whether she can get there. If not I suspect she might prefer to work in an allied medical research field rather than be, say, a GP which does not appeal at all, even though the latter have plenty of other income streams like teaching students and vaccinating that can bump incomes up.

It will be good to see her settled doing something she wants. Luckily DS’ PhD makes him very employable, the question there is that he could end up anywhere in the world, whilst I, selfishly, want him to return to the UK.

Haffdonga · 03/01/2022 17:04

Just been for a long walk and pub lunch with both ds today to celebrate the last day of our work/exam/social event free break together. They got discussing why they're both going for medicine rather than law (which appealed to both of them too). Their reasons included that you can study law for years and it's competitive after all those years to get a good job at the end, whereas medicine is competitive at the beginning but if you get on and complete a medicine course you're pretty much guaranteed a job at the end. Definitely not a noble or worthy reason but perhaps realistic!

Unlike Sleep's dd, Ds2 says he's now more drawn to the GP route after previously saying he'd hate it because it offers more chance of work -life balance than most other branches of med (again, perhaps not the answer they'd want to hear in an interview).

Ds2 has managed to catch up with lots of his local friends over the break and it's great they're all finding their feet in the world. There are some really interesting careers in the group. As well as the grad schemers, a couple of PhDs and 'professions' one friend now edits a very popular kids TV show and another has been sponsored through drama school by a Hollywood A lister and is finding some success on the London stage. I feel ridiculously proud on them all (though I obviously have nothing to do with their success!) - that despite courses and lives messed up by Covid along the way this normal bunch of kids from the local comp seem to be flourishing, as do all the dds and dss on this thread. Roll on a positive 2022 for them all.

Parker231 · 03/01/2022 19:27

@Haffdonga - DH came to the U.K. on a scholarship when he was 21 and completed his medical training over here. Originally his plan was to work towards being an A&E Consultant. However when DT’s were born it wasn’t compatible with a good family life and I also wanted to continue with my career. DH then trained as a GP and it worked well for our family until Covid hit when the hours he has worked over the last 20 months have been inhumane. Thankfully DH handed back his GP contract a couple of months ago and closed the practice, in part because of the disastrous way the government have handled Covid and abused the NHS staff but we are leaving the U.K. next year so the time was right. As much as I wanted DH to have a proper rest and do nothing until he starts his new job when we’ve moved, he is now going to be doing three sessions a week back working in A&E.

Xenia · 03/01/2022 21:33

All very interesting and always has been - why we all end up doing those things we do and what makes that so.

When I graduated in 1982 we had the worst unemployment for 50 years (3). In 2021 the UK has had the fullest employment in the whole of my adult life so although I agree it has been an unusual time for graduates in employment terms it is not as tough as in some periods eg one of my daughters was looking for jobs in the 2008 credit crunch which was hard. I think that period was harder for graduate jobs than now although I suppose every generation thinks they have things uniquely difficult. " Vacancies hit 1.1 million between July and September, the Office for National Statistics said, the highest level since records began in 2001." BBC. For experienced lawyers too there is massive demand and not enough skilled people to recruit at the moment. I heard one was offered a £200,000 sign on bonus which is unheard of in law, any kind of sign on bonus is extremely rare. I expect NHS jobs for doctors are probably available too (never mind my older's son's job as delivery driver).

I suppose all graduates have the age old problem that until you have experience you are a liability not a help which is why going back 100 or 200 years old your father would have to pay someone to take you on for 5 years to train you in that trade of silversmith or law etc etc which reflected economic reality that until you have a few years of experience most young people are not that useful for skilled jobs.

Haffdonga · 09/01/2022 22:02

DS's graduation ceremony was supposed to be tomorrow but has now been postponed to September. Somehow I don't think there'll be much enthusiasm for a ceremony a full year after what ended up being an entirely online qualification with people who only met on a screen.

We took ds back to uni this weekend. Nice housemates, shame about the state of his room! Wink

SandyIrvine · 10/01/2022 09:18

Can I ask for advice? DS2 is doing a conversion masters (business and management). He is enjoying it and doing well. He applied for a couple of graduate jobs at the end of last term and has been offered a really good job with one. However they asked if he could start immediately (actually 6-8 weeks). He is keen (probably seduced by the salary) but to be fair it is a good fit for him.

Do you think he might regret not completing his masters?

bigTillyMint · 10/01/2022 11:26

@SandyIrvine, I’m guessing this is a graduate entry level job? What sort of career progression would the job situation offer? Would not completing his Masters effectively preclude him from reaching higher levels? Or slow him down? How would he feel about that?

What seems a good salary at 21 might not be so attractive at 30+ if he is unable to progress easily. However, this might not be the case! He needs to look into it carefully wrt future opportunities IMHO!

Also Masters loan might be seen as “wasted” and possibly tied into a rental agreement?

Xenia · 10/01/2022 11:47

As he has started this one year masters and really likes it could he ask the employer to let him work part time and do both at once? I am not sure of the structure of his masters but he probably has this coming term and the summer term and then writing a dissertation through the summer? That might be longer for an employer to wait than someone finishing their finals in June 2022 I suppose.

SandyIrvine · 10/01/2022 11:56

@bigTillyMint. Thanks for the response. I made him check the education in Linkedin of the 3 people who interviewed him and are one, two and three levels above the job he has been offered. Only one had a masters. So maybe okay.

Job is a graduate one plus commuting from home for masters (most online so far anyway) so no issues with rental contacts (plus they are offering 5k relocation). He should be able to get a refund of 50% of his masters loan but agree money will be wasted and he will end up paying it back very quickly.

Might see if he can pause the masters and pick up later in case job not what he expected.

Carriemac · 10/01/2022 12:03

I'd finish the semester and ask for a deferral for the masters before starting .

SandyIrvine · 11/01/2022 13:23

Graduate scheme is pretty hands on. After a few weeks training he is in charge of a team of about 40 (with support). I doubt he would manage both this and finishing his masters at least not initially. He has a call with HR tomorrow so hoping he can negotiate a start date at end of this semester so would just have the project semester to go and uni might agree to defer this.

Xenia · 11/01/2022 22:13

That sounds like a good plan and a project semester sounds like something he could pick up later or do at weekends may be. Also most jobs have a probationary period and not everyone passes it so if he doesn't then he could go back to the masters which would be harder if he completely left the masters now.

Xenia · 11/01/2022 22:16

For law (my career) a masters is no advantage in most cases for example (as there are specific post grad professional exams instead) but it will depend on his career.

Meanwhile my twins have now done 2 days of their final exams for last term's subjects and they finish this lot of exams in the middle of next week. So far they seem to think they went well. It is their first observed (proctored) exams with web cam and need to scan the room with your webcam, have nothing electronic other than your computer in the room etc but now they have done 3 of those exams they are getting the hang of how to it (and some people have opted to go into the exam hall in London instead which removes the risks of your internet connection going down or your laptop crashing (as happened to someone they know on Monday))

Parker231 · 15/01/2022 17:08

Happy Saturday everyone!

Skiing holiday is already feeling like a distant memory and everyone has flown back to their respective countries. We have already decided that we will go back to the same resort next year.
DD had an exam the day after flying back - she said it was a real time oral translation exam forming 35% of the course grades. You don’t get to know in advance which languages the examiners will choose or the subject material. She seemed to think it had gone well and this week she and her boyfriend moved into their first flat together. DS is still loving life and work in Amsterdam although he is also looking forward to a work trip to Dubai.

Hope everyone’s DC are doing well with exams, finding jobs and their new lives.

Xenia · 16/01/2022 11:12

Glad the Parker daughter exam seems to have gone well and all the foreign travel/countries sounds interesting.

My law school twins have the last of this group of exams this coming week in their core subjects of the year (after having 6 exams last week, 5 of which were on webcam/ proctored - their first of that kind). The property law exam was very hard and someone saw the lecturer in the library last week who said she was shocked by it but she thinks the markers will make allowances given it was so hard. The other exams have been fine. Next week's exams are 25% of the marks for the law course.

Then they have a week off and move into a different set of topics (with 7 more exams between mid Feb and the month after) before the final stage with exams in June. i thought this terms 7 was an easy term in skills but it does involve things like exams in wills, solicitors;' accounts, professional rules never mind recorded and live exams in interviewing and advocacy so it might be soft skills (and you just have been pass/be deemed competent) but there seems to continue to be hours of work each week but the twins should be okay with that.

As the twins have chosen to do the exams at home (you can do them in Waterloo if you prefer in person) it has been interesting for me observing the rules and issues, surge in demand on Friday of students logging in at once - that was not a proctored exam but within a fixed time slot but they did eventually get started okay. Our internet goes down for about 1 minute most days at least once but that has not caused a problem so far in the exam and my son will be on my lap top next week as his died yesterday. Hopefully his can be repaired after the exams this week.

So it felt like running an exam centre last week, landlines off the hook, keeping quiet etc. One has the living room with the huge table and the other does his on his PC at the big desk in his bed room so that seems to be working fine.

Xenia · 20/01/2022 13:00

Exact Bristol graduation dates are now out www.bristol.ac.uk/graduation/dates/ for our children like my twins who graduated in 2020 from Bristol.

Apparently students who had earlier expressed an interest will receive an email which will enable them to register to attend so look out for it.
We have one twin one week and one the week after but at least it is in their holidays (from their law course) so convenient.

bigTillyMint · 20/01/2022 19:08

Thanks @Xenia - I alerted DD who is now onto it! Hers is luckily a 1.30pm start so we can go for the day Smile

Horsemad · 20/01/2022 21:03

So glad to hear Bristol's graduations are happening!
I did wonder before DS's whether it would feel weird, it being a year after the event but it was such a brilliant day. I loved watching them reunite with their coursemates, as they had been apart for so long. It really was lovely to observe. ♥️

Parker231 · 21/01/2022 08:16

Ive not heard anything about DT’s graduations (Warwick and York) but as neither are interested in coming back to the U.K. for it, i don’t think they will have registered for it. I’d have loved to see them formally graduate but can understand their view that it’s in the past now and they have moved on.

Malbecfan · 21/01/2022 12:14

Hello everyone. I hope you are all well

It's nice to read up how everyone's DC are getting on. Nothing much to report from here. DD1 is now in her 2nd term of PhD work. She had to present on what she had done so far (not the rowing, dancing, football, singing or cooking bits) and that went well. She has been asked to do quite a few ore lab demonstrations this term for which she gets paid and she is still supervising 2 groups of freshers so I'm not quite sure when she gets any work done. At least she is making ends meet financially. Her sister is now at home with us as she still isn't allowed into Japan. She is on a year abroad there, but is making it work and has just got herself a job in a local cafe which means she is getting out and interacting with other people as well as earning a bit. It's nice for me to have one of them here.

Xenia · 21/01/2022 12:48

I was surprised the keen were keen to attend theirs. I suppose their end of university (last term) was spoilt by the pandemic so they want the graduations at lease. I fear for the 10.30am one we will need to book a hotel the night before once they have fully registered for it but the one the week after is the afternoon slot so we can drive over. My son's friend is in the same group as he is but a different subject as is the girl friend of the other son and I think both twins will go to the other's graduation. In the past we had some or all their siblings there too but now two have small children and work that is not going to happen but that is not a problem.

Meanwhile the twins have just finished their probably most important academic law exams of this year after a very busy 2 weeks of about 8 exams so having rest of this week and next off. Last exams are mid June. One needs his covid pass for an event today and noticed it is not showing his booster. I knew when he came back from the booster without the little card his twin had been given something might have gone wrong. It sounds like he would have to make some very long call on a helpline to sort it out but at least his vaccination is still valid to cover today even if about to expire.

Needmoresleep · 21/01/2022 13:57

Xenia, a qick post as I am on my way home after volunteering at a vaccination centre. Things are now really quiet. If he is able to pop into the centre where his vaccination was done, they should be able to sort it out there and then, especially if he can recall the date and time. It then appears on the NHS app 24 hours later. It was very busy before Christmas and he is not the only one. Easy to make an input error...maybe only a single character or digit.

And if any young people are thinking it is all over or just "the flu" a friend's super fit DS aged 17 has just been diagnosed with long Covid and faces heart, lung and brain scans after being infected in November.

Xenia · 21/01/2022 16:20

Good plan. I looked at what the NHS say to do but it sounded like call centre hell whereas if he just pops into what I think is a local pharmacy he walked to to get his 3rd jab with the evidence they gave him his 3rd jab they could probably sort it out then and there.