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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Some of our young people are half way through their degrees (2019/20 intake): lockdowns on repeat, light at the end of the tunnel with vaccinations (?) and the legacy of COVID-19

987 replies

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 14/01/2021 16:01

Previous thread

Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose is all I can say!

OP posts:
Itscoldouthere · 01/02/2021 15:37

My DS2 is pretty useless at cooking not because we didn’t try to teach him but because he hasn’t got much interest in food.
As the only female in the house I made sure the males cooked so we did try and equip him with some cooking skills but he had little interest in using them.
He is currently trying out the meal delivery company Gusto in an attempt to cook more proper food, it delivers all the ingredients and cooking instructions. So far it’s working quite well although it is expensive, but he was living on pre made sandwiches and pot noodles by choice, so I think it’s a good investment.

bigTillyMint · 01/02/2021 16:30

@simbobs, tell him to persevere! DS has taught his flatmate how to make quite a few things, and another friend rang DS to ask him about cooking the veg for his house Christmas dinner!!!

DS didn’t cook at home before he went to uni, though he used to help me with meals and baking when he was under 10 Grin

Parker231 · 01/02/2021 16:44

Neither of mine have ever been interested in cooking or preparing meals but have enjoyed what they can produce with their flat mates from Gusto and Hello Fresh.

simbobs · 01/02/2021 17:49

DS and one of his flatmates seem to have a bit of a Masterchef thing going on, but he has never cooked for us when at home. They don't often cook together as a flat, either.

MrKlaw · 01/02/2021 18:00

my son made something up the other day and posted it on whatsapp. Just chicken thighs in tomato sauce with butter beans served with rice, but it looked nice so I'm cooking it this weekend. He's using our simple family tomato sauce which he's learned by cooking a few times when he was at home so that was useful for him.

Good to see him experimenting a little bit

MrKlaw · 01/02/2021 18:03

oh we had Hello Fresh for a while and that also encouraged the kids to cook (this was back when they were around 12 and 14 maybe?). We cancelled due to the high prices but we still often cook those recipes - my daughter makes a mean Orzo and mozzarella, and a lentil & bacon soup with..sprinkled toasted breadcrumbs (there's a proper word for it I can't remember).

Neither of them have a big repetoire but its more capability than I had when I went to Uni

Ginfordinner · 01/02/2021 18:34

At least you tried to teach him @Itscoldouthere. Although I'm struggling to get my head around the idea of a teenage young man not being very interested in food Smile

TBH the bit that surprised me was that it didn't seem to occur to the parent that teaching the son to cook would be a good idea. Oh well.

Benjispruce2 · 01/02/2021 18:50

Both my DDs did Food and Nutrition at GCSE though uni Dd never cooked much at home. Now she’s always sending me photos of lovely things she’s made. Last night was a pepper stuffed with giant cous cous and mozzarella. I’m now craving it!

Itscoldouthere · 01/02/2021 18:52

@Ginfordinner DS has Aspergers and had a very typical beige/brown food preference whilst growing up. He was very adverse to vegetables which was interesting as he went to a vegetarian school, but basically at school he ate pasta, cheese and a boiled egg every day. He has got better as he’s got older and if he gets very interested in a subject that motivates him he will try different food, so he will happily try Japanese or Korean food, as he’s very into Asian culture.
His idea of nice food is all mainly bad donuts, crisps, Percy pigs, sweets, pizza, pot noodles cereal toasted cheese sandwiches.
I’ve always cooked at home and put everything on his plate but it’s always been an argument, especially about veg and salad. I think he has been influenced by friends as he’s got older so will for example now eat a burger and not remove everything but if he can order it plain just burger and bread he would choose to do that.

Ginfordinner · 01/02/2021 19:16

Oh sorry @Itscoldouthere. I didn't realise. I hope he is enjoying branching out.

Itscoldouthere · 01/02/2021 19:29

@Ginfordinner oh don’t worry, it’s something we are very comfortable with and we joke about it a lot. I’m really pleased he’s trying Gusto I think he likes the fact it’s made easy and he doesn’t have to worry about buying the right ingredients, he’s happy to follow the instructions.
But I agree about not teaching any young person some cooking skills seems crazy to me.
DS2 house used to do a weekly joint cooking session when they were in halls together last year and I think they still do the odd Sunday Roast, it would be awful if you had no skills to contribute at all.

Motherhubbardscupboard · 02/02/2021 08:42

Thought I would update. DD went back yesterday by train, no issues on the journey. She has a lateral flow test booked today and will book the others in line with university guidance. She won't be coming back until restrictions are lifted. I'm in two minds whether it was the 'right' decision and do feel guilty, although I know selfishly it was the right decision for her, especially as she got confirmation yesterday that they won't be moderating work to take account of whether only online sources have been used.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 02/02/2021 18:00

DS was so in the beige camp of food when he was little (diary, meat, carbs, baked beans and oranges were his diet until he was well over five). He has improved a lot over the years but still not keen on veg at all (although he will eat lettuce, cucumbers and tomatoes on sufferance). His culinary repertoire has expanded since becoming a student but he's never going to be an adventurous cook. Although, on the subject of food he and DD always liked their smelly French cheeses, whitebait, mussels, snails and that type of thing.

OP posts:
ifonly4 · 03/02/2021 15:34

DD came home November and handed notice in on her flat the morning lockdown was announced. Keys posted back but she has to empty room early next month.

She was in a dark, cold flat and only had her four flatmates for company. At home she has us (not sure she'd count that as a positive). She had a lockdown job which was extended to September, and she's managed to get that back which is about 30-34 hours a week. She also has a friend she walks with a couple of times a week, and other one wants to do the same - she just doesn't have the time at the moment.

VanCleefArpels · 03/02/2021 17:59

@ifonly4 your daughter was v lucky the landlord accepted Notice assuming they had a 12 month tenancy agreement. Not sure many would do the same hence why so many students have gone back

simbobs · 03/02/2021 18:40

DS got the train home today and has decided that he will move back to his student flat next week when weather permits, as he will need a lift next time so that he can take all of his stuff. The flatmate with unofficially resident gf mentioned upthread have moved out until after Easter so that is one thing less to worry about. That said, he had to do a fair bit of cleaning this week. The rest of them just don't seem to care. He feels that he should go back, though. If I'm honest, I'm glad that he came to that conclusion. It seems wrong to be paying for the room and not occupying it.

simbobs · 06/02/2021 15:35

DS seems to have changed his mind agai, and is staying until the end of the month, partly down to differing standards amongst the occupants of the flat. He did some cleaning last week and raised the issue with the lad that has spent most time there, only to be told that his expectations are unrealistic. All he wants is for them to keep on top of things, eg wash up after themselves so that other people can use the kitchen.

It means he saves some money whilst making a dent in our budget. DH thinks DS would leave if the fridge were not so well stocked.

Zandathepanda · 06/02/2021 16:14

Dd got a nhs/Mori letter for a random covid test. She thought she’d do her civic duty and so sent for one. It’s arrived and the instructions say she has to do the test before 8am on the day a courier collects it! Not sure if she knows what a 7 looks like on her phone Grin.

bigTillyMint · 06/02/2021 17:20

@Zandathepanda Grin

icanbewhatiwant · 06/02/2021 17:43

@Zandathepanda ha ha yes. Dh and ds2 have both done those at different times. Ds2 wasn't happy at doing it early. Courier came about 5pm too...so he definitely thought it was a waste of getting up.

Ginfordinner · 06/02/2021 17:44

Your DS's situation sounds awful simbobs. At the end of the tenancy it sounds like your DS and maybe you might have to do a lot of cleaning or you can wave goodbye to the deposit.

NewModelArmyMayhem18 · 07/02/2021 15:02

Lots of housework dodgers around. It was ever thus, unfortunately.

OP posts:
simbobs · 07/02/2021 15:43

@ginfordinner I don't think he has any expectation of getting the deposit back (this time , either). He is bored now, been working this morning, but no chance doing anything due to the weather.

Ginfordinner · 07/02/2021 15:57

It's just so soul destroying at the moment isn't it. Miserable weather, online work, nothing to look forward to, and that's just for the adults. I really feel for the young people right now.

Then you get the idiots at Sheffield University giving all students a bad name.

ZZTopGuitarSolo · 07/02/2021 16:07

I just did a double take when I looked at DD's weather today. It's -18C there. The high this week will be -5.