Open University dilemma

[Danzudogs2]

I recently resurrected a degree with OU which started a few years ago. It was a knee jerk reaction to a disastrous return to work after about 15 years which resulted in being conned into doing a pointless course for which I had to borrow £600 and then extricating myself from a disorganised department mired in chaos and on the brink of collapse.

The job itself was local and I got it through a friend who suggested me.

To give a bit of background I have no qualifications, have been self employed over the years and did a few years of secretarial and admin temping in the 90s. I live in the middle of nowhere, have 3 children, one grown up, one in high school one in primary and have limited access to transport so the job seemed like a gift from God! Jobs are thin on the ground around here and what I have managed to do has often clashed with childcare issues and has not been worth it:
it always seems to end up costing me money rather than earning me any. Also it meant I could get out of the house and depressing routine of the school run-dog walk-laundry-school run. I often go for weeks without seeing anyone except my husband in the evenings, the children and the dog. My friends and I all live very far apart and even getting together for coffee is a massive undertaking and ends up costing a small fortune, I no longer drink as it makes me so ill and so slowly I have lost my social life. My husband and I don't have any family - none.
At first the OU course seemed like the perfect thing to keep me occupied in the absence of a job as I had got used to be being busy. But only a few months on and my mental state is so low I just can't concentrate and the nasty realisation that studying will not get me a job either is adding to what is beginning to feel like despair. The only reason I can think of for carrying on with it is giving my children something to respect me for; make it look as though I am 'doing something'. Sadly, that thought isn't giving me the oomph I need to get on with it.

We are very short of money, don't ever go out and can't afford holidays. I'm right back where I was last year. Our house is falling apart so is not worth selling and we can't afford to do the work that needs to be done and most of it is necessary not cosmetic. My husband and I are 49 + and are drifting into an old age of poverty in a crumbling house without any support and I'm wondering if OU is going to be the key to sorting all this out!

OP, as nobody else has done so, I'll send you an unMN hug and some You sound really down - I don't have a lot to suggest but didn't want you to feel that nobody was bothered.

You say you have no qualifications. Ok, what is the OU course? I have done some and found you have to be incredibly disciplined to succeed. Definitely talk to or email your tutor as you don't sound as if you are in the right frame of mind at the moment. Is there any scope for doing something out of the house that will bring in some cash? You have a primary-aged DC; is there any MTA work going at their school? If not, can you volunteer to read or work withe some of the children as that would at least get you out of the house and give you something to aim for each day even if money doesn't come in. At least you would be interacting with other people and getting some mental stimulation. If a paid position came up, you would at least be known to the school.

Good luck, keep on keeping on and if you want to PM me, go ahead.

Hi Malbecfan thank you for your kind reply.
I literally can't afford to leave the house, so volunteering is out of the question. To put it into context, the nearest town (very small) is 5 miles away, the next town, same size is 15 miles away and our nearest big town is nearly an hour away - there are no buses.
The job I recently left was also partly unofficially voluntary, the understanding had been that being there full time while only officially employed for 22 hours, would be for support for my course. That didn't happen and inevitably I was taken advantage of.
In terms of schools, they are all Welsh speaking and I'm not. My children are Welsh speaking but I haven't been able to pick it up from them. It has been on my mind to take proper lessons as language is my skill but I feel now that I would be chasing yet another 'rainbow' to no real end. (just like the OU course) I would still be competing with other more qualified people, younger and fluent! The fact remains that I don't have the transport or support.

Also, we need money now, not at some unspecified time in the future after some studying, with almost no prospect of employment.
I suppose that my only option is working from home but I have spent years researching jobs from home and have never found any realistic options. One to one literacy tuition has crossed my mind but again I don't have any 'proven' experience in this area, it would require a lot of effort to actually get clients and then I cannot imagine anyone would drive all the way up here for that. In the same way, it would not be worth me driving to civilisation for the occasional hour here or there.
the thought of continuing with the study and being well and truly stuck in the house all day fills me with horror and I think that's why I am going off the studying generally. Since before Christmas I have had no desire to pick up my books; it just seems pointless.

I am slightly wondering why you are living where you are. What does DH do? (Have I missed that?)

I have to say no friend of mine that’s done ou ever got a job because of that. They had a good cv anyway and lots of hands on skills. They enjoyed ou and did it for personal satisfaction.

So what to do? Work at the local school? Pub or shop? As dc get older they will be more self sufficient. They might have to bite the bullet and you need to work. Is there a care home or other local employer you could bike to? Can you borrow to get a car? How does DH get to work? Arrange lifts?

I do sympathise but living in rural Wales is a lifestyle you once wanted I assume.

Having done OU courses shows a potential employer that you have self discipline and intelligence, even if the job isn't related to the course subject.

I do know people who got jobs using OU qualifications, also.

If a house move could be an option for you, look into the finances of that.
Don't just write off your house because it needs a lot of work. Someone may be interested enough to buy it regardless.

Actually, it was work (self employed) that brought me this way.

Your post implies that I have come from somewhere else, but I've been in the area for over 20 years. Before that, a military background since childhood so it is the longest time I have lived anywhere and certainly not a 'lifestyle' choice.

It's not worth more than about £150k, if that, in the current climate. It would require a certain amount of investment to get it ready and then to actually move. The central heating is about to pack up, some of the windows don't close properly and are rotting. The kitchen is disgusting. We are in the cheapest location because it's so remote which means a move to a more expensive house which, obviously we can't afford.
I am unemployable. At some point I need to come to terms with this.