Minimum Maintenance Loan but we just cant afford the shortfall!

[JufusMum]

Hi all - looking for some advice. Because of DH salary we just about fall into the bracket where DD will get the minimum maintenance load (about £4300). The fact is that doesn't even cover her rent let alone food and travel, so we are wondering what we do? I understand parental contribution but with our bills, even though DH has a decent salary I only earn a very small amount and I am not sure where this extra £4-5k a year is going to spring from. I am considering weekend/evening jobs and looking at scholarships/bursaries but most are means tested. How do "middle earners" cope?

Could you move - smaller house if DD moves out, smaller mortgage, less driving, less commuting?

The main issue here is DH's travel and petrol costs. He needs to find a closer job, even if it involved a pay cut. £300 pw = over £15,000 a year on petrol. That is insanity

That's just the benefit in kind tax!! Not the actual petrol! he spends more than that in real terms

Do you know what I am going to stop posting on this thread, there is way to much nastiness around. Thank to you those who have offered useful advice.

The car thing is insane.
I can't believe parents don't plan ahead for this.
I have 2 kids and 2 step kids
1 finished after 4 years at uni, 2 in now and 1 to go
I work 50 hours as a week as a teacher/tutor to help. My dh earns very well but has maintenance to pay as well. It's up to parents to help kids to get an education.

Youre chose to live an hour away from school, 40mins from work and your husband presumabky works the other side fo the country to be pay 15000 in tax on petrol (so how much petrol would that be?!)

You have 5k in savings and a big house and want to buy your uni student a car..

This doesn't really sound like a problem. This is far richer than a lot of students families will be!

Well, I think the most useful advice is to try to get your dh to drive a cheaper more economical car which would solve all your problems in one fell swoop. If he drove a Toyota Yaris or equivalent you could go on holiday, save AND finance your dd through uni. It's your choice.

sounds like DH would be better off without company car £1200 on taxes for car doesn't sound right at all

I think its because its how youve phrased it. Youve said "I cant afford the shortfall!" And people have come wanting to help someone struggling. But you're far better off than most people with savings and wanting to buy cars and dance lessons etc. You can afford the shortfall.

If youd phrased it differently for help on bidgetting and listed your outgoings or i general about cost of uni I think youd have had a better reception.

It's your responsibility to support your child at university, and the amount is affordable based on your household income - that's what means testing is all about.

I really cannot believe that your DH is spending £1300 a month on fuel, I just can't. That is absolutely not sensible or reasonable, and should be the first thing to go. Incidentally £1300 a month would pay for about 13,000 miles per month, or nearly 160,000 miles per year at FULL COST, not just a tax charge, so I'm afraid you must be mistaken on this one.

But, in a general sense, yes, of course parents support their children at University, and yes, will have to make sacrifices to do so. I can't see why this would come as a surprise to anyone!

I think Trewser is right. Look at your outgoings. How on earth is he spending 1200 a month on petrol tax?! If you can work that out you will have plenty spare for your daughter.

dh pays 4k a year in extra tax for his company car and petrol. Ok, he probably doesn't do as many miles as your dh, but even if he spent an extra 200 a month on petrol that's about 8.5k less than your dh pays.

I'm sorry to go on about it but it's seriously one of the biggest wastes of money I've ever seen on the many mumsnet threads about budgeting

It's fine, @JufusMum, I understand you didn't mean it to come across how it did, I really do.

I'm sure you'll be ok.

(And YY, I agree with @SquashedFlyBiscuit - I read the title and expected a different kind of thread, that's all.)

Have you managed to get any advice you'll actually use here op?
I agree that some posts are a bit spiky but I think there's loads of useful info too.

Probably not, because what she needs to do is to tell her dh that he needs to stop driving a BMW X5 and start driving a Ford Fiesta!

I don't think you or dh need to change jobs or anything as dramatic as that, you just need to rearrange your finances round a bit.

OP if you are still here then my advice is to get yourself to a bank and ask to speak to a financial adviser. They will get all excited thinking you are going to buy some insurance product from them, but what you really need is someone to look at ALL your finances with a cold hard eye. At the moment you are all tied up in a tangle with thinking about cars, dance lessons, savings pots etc, but you are not viewing it realistically, there is money there, you just need to be sensible about how you prioritise your spending for the next three or four years.

BTW Has your socially anxious daughter really thought how she is going to cope in a job which will mean dealing with the great British public at their worst? Apart from which it is the sort of job where support from colleagues is essential, if she carries on using all her free time for her dance then she won't be able to build up good relationships with her peers, which is not going to stand her in good stead.

Wouldn’t it be better for her just to apply to join the police? Where is the benefit of doing a degree first?

If a PP’s sums are correct, the DH is driving 650 miles PER DAY. That’s insane (and probably not possible?). Surely cheaper for him to Airbnb Mon-Fri where he works?

There is something wrong with the calculation of your fuels benefits in kind tax. It is worked out according to HMRC data, which is freely available and is a fixed amount/ percentage. IF he is being assessed as - private fuel benefit in kind then he will not be directly paying for any fuel as that would all be covered by his company, that is what a benefit in kind is and the tax liability is coded in to his tax code. If he pays for all private fuel he should not be assessed as having the benefit.
So, what is his actual tax code, and what the hell is he actually driving.? Charges are worked out based on emissions.
He could refuse the private fuel benefit, an employer legally cannot force you to have this. He would than have to keep perfect records of his private usage, and pay this back to the company. HMRC have detailed guidelines, and driving to and from his place of work (office) is PRIVATE use.
If you posted his tax code on here we could see where the confusion is.

I will ask DH to check on his fuel/tax outgoings, maybe they have made a big mistake. I know we spend approx £800 a month at the petrol pump on the company fuel card of which 90% at least is private mileage. I do not have access to DH's pay slips so I cannot give his tax code.

Needanexpert
From Jan 2020 the Police require a degree to apply, this can be done as a degree apprenticeship but because the Police is not a 9-5 job there is a high drop out rate as apprentices work very long shifts and have to study for a full time degree in their spare time. We have been advised against it.
DD is not socially anxious she just does not enjoy going out/parties/cinema/drinking/boyfriends as most 17 year olds do. She has wanted to be a police officer since she was 6, and has completed 2x work experience opportunities with our local Police headquarters. She relys on her dance for down time, mental wellbeing and social life. Her dancing IS her social life.
Please show me a university student that does not have a social life?
Yes I have received some helpful comments on here but also, sadly some rather spiky ones.

we save around £200 a month but I guess we will just not be able to put anything into savings while DD is at Uni?

WTF? You've lost my sympathy now. No of course you won't be able to save - just give her that money. Plus another £100 a month that you'll be saving by not feeding her, and you're done.

Were you really expecting that you'd be able to continue to save at the same rate as now?

FWIW dh and I have no savings, and one 10 year old car between us.

You have a damn sight more than the vast majority of families in the UK you know - two decent cars, savings (what are you saving for?), a holiday abroad each year.

Sorry OP if you didn't like the term "socially anxious". I made an assumption based on the words you used about her, ie "socially reclusive" and reliant on her dancing for her mental health. Apologies.

However, my point about needing to socialise with her peers in her chosen career still stands. Most students have a variety of activities they do to socialise, cinemas, theatres, parties, relationships etc, she is not doing herself any favours by concentrating on a very niche activity which is not likely to be shared by many of the fellow students on her course.

Police officers , including those in training or working the job, need to be able to offload experiences with others who understand frustrations and situations and are able to empathise. They know it is not healthy to take those emotions home.

If your DD gets only the minimum loan it's because your family income is well above £60k. Ours less than £40k and we still funded two DC through uni, making their loans up to the maximum.
Don't underestimate how much you will save not having a teenager at home. Food, electricity, petrol all went down massively when mine went to uni.
Also remember they are not there 52 weeks of the year. There are long breaks when they are on holiday and you won't need to top her up in the holidays so much.
However I have to agree with others that if you can manage to top up her loan as much as possible then she will have to decided whether she can afford an extravagantly expensive hobby.

I know we spend approx £800 a month at the petrol pump on the company fuel card of which 90% at least is private mileage.

Don’t you think that’s utterly insane? Even allowing for a guzzler he must never be at home.

How far away is he working to spend £800 a month on petrol?