Can you help me with these queries?

[universityadvisesought]

My DS thinks he's in a frustrations position he is applying for 2017 with his grades. A, A, A, maths, (he has been formally assessed and found to be literally a maths genius but has absolutely no interest in the subject), a science and a humanity, but he seriously regrets his choice of subjects wishing he'd done at the very least one MFL. He only want to go to Scotland because he likes the way Scottish degrees are organised; you can study more than one subject in the first two years and he hopes at the very least this is a way into studying at least one if not two MFL (Italian and probably French), the university he's particularly interested in offer courses for "beginners"
My questions are can you apply to only one university? Can you apply for two completely unrelated courses at the same university, e.g. an MFL (an A level in a MFL is not required just proof of an aptitude for an MFL, he has three A*'s at IGCSE in MFL's lowest % was 97%, with zero work/effort on his part and he has an excellent ear for languages, he's an enthusiastic and fairly regular visitor to Italy and he unlike his mother demonstrates good understanding of spoken Italian and excellent pronunciation) and a subject like psychology? He doesn't know how competitive it is to get onto a MFL course so wonders if he's more likely to be accepted for a subject like psychology with his subjects and then he can hopefully pick up an MFL as one of his other subjects and he knows the university will let him change at the end of two years if he does well in it. Thirdly how do you word a personal statement if you applying for two completely unrelated subjects? So for example should he say he has travelled extensively in Italy? A few years ago he experienced a very traumatic event and is currently planning a journey in Italy on his own of over 1500km by public transport and on foot in the steps of his Italian hero, (think of the films Into The Wild or A Walk On The Wild Side, like the characters in the films I guess he's hoping to sort his head out) should mention this (not the trauma bit obviously)?
Hope this all makes sense.
TIA.

It is difficult to know what to do when your good a lots of things. He's had a careers assessment based on an some sort of aptitude test where he was found to be very good at lateral thinking and attention to detail etc and his A levels engineering etc was recommended but he hates anything to do with the practical aspects of physics, engines pendulums etc so he found it unhelpful!
He hasn't the faintest idea what he wants to do in the future apart from undertake this walk, get to grips with the meditation side of yoga and learn to ride:he talks of taking two to three years out of education I think hoping that some sort of future plan will emerge. He can stay working at the stables or get a low paid job or even a mixture of both if he wants but we will not find him past the end of summer 2017 if he doesn't go to uni he'll have to generate his own income somehow.

All of the things that he wants to do like the walk and the meditation and the riding take money. either he is going to have to earn it or you are going to have to pay for this. if you have committed to paying for all of these things already then there is no need for him to think about how he will fund things as you are there, picking up the tab.

a future plan might emerge but then it might not and a tiny number of people go to Uni after 3 or 4 years out of education.

I think in his heart of hearts he doesn't really want to go to uni but perhaps feels under pressure because there isn't anything else he wants to do. how long will this walk take? can it be postponed? I think it would be a good idea to try and get him as much and as varied work experience as you can. reading your posts, he has the potential to drift. sometimes this can work out but often it doesn't and the parents end up paying for a succession of short courses, all good in themselves but not leading to work.

get him to take a proper look at USA universities as a change of environment might be helpful to him.

We agreed to fund his gap year only in that we provide accommodation food etc buy him clothes as necessary but not fully pay for him to go walking in Italy, (for maybe 8 weeks, it's a long walk) we'd pay for basic food and maybe some transport cost, we are currently doing this now but not accommodation, meals in restaurants and endless bottles of Italian wine and trips to the opera! He knows this.
Your right he could drift but how does anyone address this? I think it's easy for teenagers who've just been spat out of education, to imagine that being a tree surgeon or a river warden is more exciting and interesting than going onto more education especially if you don't have a plan or burning ambition to be a lawyer accountant doctor or astronaut. How on earth do you know what job might tick enough boxes to mean you enjoy it? If your not motivated by the desire to earn lots of money and have its associated trappings, or make a difference to others or be an innovator in your field, or your not passionate about animals, etc? I wonder how many teenagers just tootle off to university because that's what they know it is expected of them and it's the easy route? How many are happy? He was talking to a friend who's just finished his MSc with a top grade at Oxbridge and is now going onto to do a PhD, he admits it's not what he wants to really do but he can't see what other options there are for him he can't get off the conveyor belt. On the other hand teenagers don't see that work is also a conveyor belt, how many of us can step off and do what we want. Are we all fulfilled and happy in our jobs?
Having said all of this a friends DS was just the same, he took two years out drifted, worked in a Burger King, travelled, etc then went off to uni, he doesn't regret it, yes he found the first year hard, getting back into studying, but because when he decided to go to uni it was his decision he said he went with a different attitude, not just because you're on a school/parental expectation conveyor belt. Now in his 30's he's a an leading expert in his field and a professor, at one of the worlds most famous universities having been head hunted for the job. When he left school he never envisedged he'd be where he is now.
I do agree about a change of environment, e.g. the US I think it might help he goes there next month it will be interesting to see what he thinks.

He must be told most good employers for high paid jobs recruit by institution and you need 2/1 or higher. So if he is sue he wants Scotland he should put Edinburgh and St Andrew's down ( I presume he knows that will mean 4 years not 3 at UK universities). It would be better if he also put places like Bristol and Durham too - i.e. the better universities. He should be a bit careful about ex polys etc although if he is going into fairly low paid work later where the institution does not count then it will not matter whereas if he wanted to do law which is very feasible given his interests and abilities he needs to go for the better universities for his first degree. UK employers are not yet very familiar with US universities so do bear that in mind too.

2016 thank you for your advise very helpful although I don't think he's looking at "ex polys"

Good. I know someone who went to London Met and was wondering why their legal career was not going anywhere. Answer - wrong university. Glasgow is a fine institution but perhaps not quite as well regarded as Edinburgh - the scots on the thread can beat me up over that now.....

Some teenagers listen to advice. Others ignore it. I have had a variety with mine. The youngest two who may go next year seem suddenly to have strong views on something but then listen to someone's advice and take that on board so perhaps the more people giving advice the better.

I don't agree it's hard to get off the conveyor belt. One of my children is not materialistic at all and he has a degree but is a postman and very very happy. He is strong and individualistic. I think he could do a lot lot better and I hope he'll pick something better but it seems to be what he likes. (his sisters are London lawyers which I do think is a bit better but I want them all to make their own choices. One of my younger ones today said he definitely wants a 9 - 5 job so he does not have to think about work after 5 but on the other hand plenty of those supposed 9 - 5 jobs mean loads of outside of hours work so I don't want him to aim low for a job where you knock off at 5 and then find it closes doors).

Currently he's not interested in law, the amount of reading puts him off. You may be interested to know that for psychology Glasgow is ranked very much significantly higher that Edinburgh top 10 (not that these league tables are the be all and end all) and higher for MFLs.

Italian at an English or Welsh University is 4 years because the third year is spent abroad. Scottish universities may well up that to 5 years (I really don't know how they work) but in general Italian is a 4 year BA.

My DD did French and Italian and she was strongly advised to not do single honours Italian - too niche and narrow. If he just wants Italian, in my view 5 years is too long - he will wish he was doing another subject. Can he really not find anything???

MFL degrees are not just about acquiring the language, there is a lot of reading and essay writing. At the best universities there is a wide variety of topics on offer but I dont think Virgil was on the list. Dante will be! Everywhere! Most Italian departments will have a great selection of modules. As he can definitely do Italian ab initio he really would be advised to find another subject to go with it. The responses you say he makes to your suggestions seem a little immature really. He does not seem to be engaging with his future. Would a gap year help? Would this focus his thoughts ?

Lots of people do not know what they want to do post degree when they start. Many degrees are not vocational. DD is now doing law after her MFL degree. But she will be a legal practitioner who can speak two Languages. MFL does not have to lead to translation or teaching.

Italian is relatively easy to get into, so he may well be ok ab ignitio
Single honours but he really should consider it with another subject.

He'd be the first to admit he's not really engaging in his future, it does bother him that he feels he can't see the point of planning for the future. His previously strong drive and ambition was knocked out of him by the traumatic event he experienced. He's received psychological help loads of support and we've been advised and he hopes the gap year will give him the time and mental space to enable him to start to properly come to terms with and work through what happened and and begin to move on.
He finished school just under two months ago the first month he did nothing just slept, now he's started doing things, this is a very positive step forward. I watched him really laugh at with his brother the other day I realised I hadn't seen him laugh like this for over two years he used to be such a happy positive person.
He even started reading some university prospectus he picked up last year.
Frankly as long as he seems happy and if he decided he was busting to go to our local ex poly to study media studies, stack shelves in Waitrose or even ride horses for the rest of his life I'd be pleased at least he'd be making some plans for the future.

university the more you say the more I think you may need to let him not plan and submit for 2017 university entry (although hopefully by the January deadline he may have a clearer idea). Let him get on with his plans and suggest that you are willing to fund a bit more if he also fits in some self study during the year for something like Italian and Further Maths with an aim of getting a qualification at the end of the year. It sounds as though it would not be onerous for his abilities and would improve his options.
If he is interested in art and Italian would art history be a possibility or too much reading and writing for him?

its not necessary to know what the tragic event in his life was to see that it is obviously still very present and an issue for him.

I really would look at some counselling, even if he has had some already because he needs to make sure that he really has come to terms with things rather than just locking them away in some sort of "emotional cupboard" making them out of sight/out of mind but not really iyswim. I completely changed career in my 40's and now run my own business and it bears absolutely no relation to what I did before. however, I do think that the good grounding he will get from education gives him the choices and the less he does now the more restrained he might be in the future.

even if he tells you he is fine he isn't coming across as such. people who have had trauma often wont plan for the future because they have a heightened realisation that it isn't a certainty.

I am just a bit worried that he thinks his 8 week walk is going to solve everything and he is going to come home fired up and ready to go. if he doesn't then this will be even more of a disappointment to him and I think you need to be managing that now.

I do hope he thinks about the US unis. in terms of courses they do have such a breadth that we don't have in the UK and he could study all sorts of modules to count towards his final degree.

He definitely has a heightened realisation that the future is uncertain in fact he realises how a moment of random and uncontrollable the bad luck can change everything.
He's has counselling but it wasnt very successful, he's always been an intensely private person.
I don't think he thinks his 8 week walk will resolve anything, in fact I think he believes that nothing will resolve how he feels but it's does give him mental space in a country he loves. I have a very stressful intense and ridiculously busy job, I find stepping out of my busy life for a while and doing something fairly mundane very therapeutic.
I have learnt over the last two years that I can't manage how he feels and thinks which is of course as a parent is very frustrating at times,, I wish I could, but he is his own person. But then who can manage how any of us feel, having suffered two bereavements myself in three years, both my parents have died, I've learnt it doesn't matter what anyone says or does it doesn't change how you feel. People say time heals and I think that's very true. My DH and I recently went on a completely amazing holiday of a life time, I found the three weeks away from all the memories, doing something completely unique (not something I'd ever have done with my own parents or even done when they were alive) that I'd never experienced before was very therapeutic.
We all cope with and accept sadness in our lives in different ways there is no one solution.
Ive managed to pursade him to go to an open day on US universities in September and look at one we know offers financial support to international student when he's in the US next month.
This is all positive he wouldn't have even considered this two months ago.