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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

How would you feel about two DC at the same uni?

32 replies

EmmaWoodlouse · 19/08/2015 22:12

DS1 is off to uni soon as some of you know.

DS2 will be applying this autumn and has recently started looking at courses he might be interested in so he can get an idea of the sort of grades he'll need. The early front-runner is the same uni DS1 is going to (though not the same course).

He'll probably change his mind 20 times before he has to make a proper decision, and even then he might not actually get the grades he needs. But my first instinct is that it might not be a good thing to have siblings at the same uni. To me a big part of the point of going is to get away from the family and gain some independence, and I could see them sticking together and not really socialising as much with other people, either as a comfort sort of thing or because they just felt a sense of obligation to each other. DS1 is not a very sociable person anyway, and if he does manage to make some sort of a social life for himself in his first year, it would be sad if he then neglected it in favour of his brother.

On the plus side, the location is fairly close to us and it would make getting them and their belongings to and from uni a bit easier - and if one of them eventually gets a car they could lift-share. But that doesn't seem like the most important consideration.

Anyone been in this position? Do you think it helped or hindered your DC, or didn't make much difference?

OP posts:
GiraffeHouse · 22/08/2015 18:59

I went to the same uni as my brother and it was no problem at all. We had completely different groups of friends, different interests and did different courses and barely saw each other. And it was a small place too.
Bumped into each other occasionally in the bar, and once in a blue moon had lunch. He was older and never interfered in my life at all.
I guess it depends on the individuals involved. We still get on really well, enjoy each other's company from time to time but are very different people.

EmmaWoodlouse · 25/08/2015 19:21

StonedGalah of course I don't get to choose! But if DS2 them asked me what I thought were the pros and cons of a particular place, it's something I might have mentioned if the comments on here hadn't helped me see that it probably isn't as much of a problem as I thought.

OP posts:
bondjanebond · 25/08/2015 21:20

Went to the same uni as DS. We were close in age, but did not really get on; it was 2nd choice for both so a bit of a surprise to find ourselves together, tbh.

Turned out brilliant. We saw each other when we wanted to, built up huge dossiers of each others' misdemeanours, slept with each others friends & all the rest of it. Ended up much closer than we could otherwise ever have been.

Several friends also had siblings there, and they too all sibbled well. Highly recommended!SmileSmileSmileSmileSmileSmileSmile

BoboChic · 26/08/2015 07:41

It really doesn't matter to you, as parent, if both your DCs go to the same university. The only people it might matter to are your DC. Let them work it out between them.

PHANTOMnamechanger · 28/08/2015 16:54

there was a set of idential twins on my course at uni, which I thought was a bit odd, and another friend had a sister doing a PhD, very different courses though so they weren't likely to bump into each other, and didn't hang out or socialise together, they certainly didn't live together and the twins left sometime in the first year, not sure why......

I have 2 DDs at the same school, and it ws so much easier for the second one going - someone to go on the bus with, someone to ask questions etc.

I expect they will try anything NOT to end up at the same uni, but they are close and it wuold be quite nice from my POV to know they had each other in an emergency.

I've got another couple of years worrying about the first one leaving home, not looking forward to it!

StregaNonaBackAfterHack · 28/08/2015 20:40

bondjanebond am guessing you meant your brother not your son!

grovel · 28/08/2015 21:14

I think it's fine for Emma to ask the question. She has not said that she's interfered. It's a legit question. My DS was at the same university as his (girl) cousin. I didn't really appreciate enjoying hearing about his excesses from my SiL.

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