Halls of residence- catered or not catered?

[mrsmootoo]

DD1 due to start university next autumn. I am keen for her to live in fully catered accommodation - I think it will be more sociable than in a small kitchen arrangement where she might not find anyone to get on with. Plus, she's not used to cooking for herself etc, so I think that will be an added hassle on top of everything else new. She's keen to self-cater, but I think that's partly nervousness about having to mingle with lots of people - I think she should leave her comfort zone! Any suggestions? Thanks

Hmm. The thing is that self catering is so much more homely rather than the institutional feeling of eating in what is basically a canteen for every meal.

Also it is quite easy to get lost in a big crowd and if she is shy it is probably easier to make friends in a smaller, more intimate setting.

Buy her a couple of student or starter cookbooks or even send her on a day long 'how to cook' course for her birthday.

If she has no experience of managing her own money then at least if its catered you know she is getting one proper meal a day.

Definitely self catering

Catered meals often grim, you are also tied to them so have to be back for mealtimes which is a pain with late lectures etc.

Plenty of time over summer to learn a few reciprs

There is no right or wrong - she should pick whatever she wants but not be afraid of leaving her comfort zone.

Yes, its a lot going on in their first term if they feed themselves too, but they grow and mature quickly and learning to cook and handle money at 18 is hardly a bad thing!

If she applies for self-catering then she can start cooking now when she isn't studying - or in the summer if she has no time now. She can come shopping with you and you can point stuff out to her.

My DD has had ups and downs with catering but she is getting there and they have discovered cheap Tesco online deliveries which they share. They even had a flat Christmas dinner - cooked between themselves.

Obviously if she goes catered, she will pick up these skills another year. That is often when grades start to count towards the degree - might that not be worse? I don't know.

She has 9 months to learn to cook! Self catered much more flexible.

Catered gets my vote!
DS was self catered and found he was confined to the same group in his 'flat' who he wasn't that keen on. He found it very hard to meet others at first due to the layout and locks on the flats. Yes it meant they had a social area (but also arguments about mess and washing up). It really affected his uni experience and made him miserable.

DD was catered and found she rarely missed a meal and even if she did there were arrangements for ordering late meals or taking out packed dinners/breakfasts. DD found it meant you were far less confined to your flat as it was perfectly acceptable at first to sit with anyone and get chatting so she quickly found a group which suited her and generally knew most people in her hall. After a while they all would text around/arrange to go to dinner at a certain time and set a time to all show up at breakfast. It was always quite fluid by the sounds of it and DD said it was rare not to find anyone you knew well enough to sit with. You learn how to cook for yourself in 2nd year so we weren't concerned that she needed to do it in first year.
It also meant DD had formal meals which she loved. It was basically three course meal, they all took a bottle of wine and had some sort of disco in the hall bar afterwards (followed by clubbing too I believe). She still says going catered was worth it for the formal nights alone - they all loved getting dressed up.

I found self catered to be much more sociable. There was 6 of us who had a flat together and we shared the cooking and meals. In the catered halls people often grabbed quick food on the go from the uni canteens instead.

I encouraged my older DCs to do catered, on the basis that when they cocked up on the budgeting front and were penniless, they'd always have a meal sorted. That certainly was useful for DS1.

I think it depends on the student. Most people seem to be going for self-catered these days. But I think the catered is a good way of meeting up with different people rather than the same small set of people.

With the greatest of respect, it's not up to you though is it? She has to do things her own way.

Check how flexible eating arrangements are in catered.

Quite often you can use a meal card at various eateries so swap and change a bit.

Self catering, for all the reasons everyone else has said.

There were about 10 of us sharing a kitchen when I was at uni, and it worked really well. It felt more homely, and was nice to see familiar faces rather than an unknown crowd in a canteen. Half of them didn't know how to cook when they moved in, so the rest of us teaching them helped with bonding. One guy couldn't be swayed from microwaveable haggis though. Sometimes with a jar of curry sauce.

I remember basically eating toast all the way through university. I'd try and persuade her to go catered. As you say, it's also a good way of meeting people (scary, but you have to grit your teeth).

I think it depends entirely on who you end up living with. Dd1 was self catered last year, with 4 other girls. They didn't cook together once and the dreadful state the kitchen got into caused huge stress. It's not always like Friends. It was a very lonely experience.

Dd2 is looking at catered halls for September because she isn't interested in cooking and thinks it could be more sociable. Honestly, I think it's down to luck.

I think a lot depends on the individual and the uni.

If the uni has halls that are a bus ride away (Leicester) then is the catering in halls only or can they have a meal on campus?

What is the catering like at the campus? What time are meals, if the evening meal is 5-6pm then she is going to be hungry later.

I've been to 5 different unis (long story - I also lived in nurses accommodation which was a bit like uni halls) and I think the best system was UCLAN. You could buy meals for cash but if you bought them with a prepaid card you got a 5% discount.

As I mature student I used the card just to get the discount, but the system was set up so students and parents could top up the card, it could only be used to buy food or things from the uni shop (books, stationary, newspapers), you could only buy alcohol on it in the 'posh' bit of the canteen where there was waiter service and you had to buy a meal to buy alcohol. It was one way parents could make sure their child ate.

I think if you are ill, or have a hangover then it is a lot easier to wander in to a kitchen in your PJs and make a cup of tea than it is to get dressed and go to a canteen.

I was thinking exactly along the same lines as you OP last year. I thought DS would have enough on his plate without having to buy and prepare all his own meals.
In the end he is in self catered halls and it has been a huge success. His flat of 8 is in a block of 30.The kitchen is the social hub not just for meals but for meeting, chatting and sometimes group working. Also the neighbouring flats socialise. And yes you can go and get breakfast in your PJs.

He learned some decent basic cooking skills and was expecting to buy a lot of ready meals for one. It turns out that they often cook for a group and eat together.

Many unis (apart from Oxbridge) only have halls for first years so the second year they have to manage living in a house. I think DS will be far better set for that now than if he had been in catered rooms.

If she wants to self cater let her - she'll have to do it in the 2nd year at most places anyway. Teach her to budget, shop & cook in the meantime.

DS has always self catered - as Secret said kitchens always seem very social, often cooking for the whole flat. After a year abroad he's back in halls for his 4th year and has opted to cater for himself as usual.

All my DCs self catered. It worked well for two of them but badly for the the third. He was in a lovely flat with a big modern shared kitchen. The problem was that there were 11 people in the flat some of which were really inconsiderate and messy. Some of his flat mates used to steal his food and would use his pots and pans and leave them for him to clean up. - most of his flatmates were nice but the few that were so antisocial made it difficult at times.
(Btw the slob by students included all sorts including medical students )
Fortuanately DS still enjoyed his first year and had plenty of friends but he was very relieved to be in a house with nice considerate friends in his second year.

Depends on uni. Catered halls At Nottingham were great

DD1 did fully catered at Leicester and enjoyed it. She really liked the social side of it. There were reasonably long mealtimes so she never missed a meal due to getting back from uni too late. The set up was breakfast and dinner Mon-Fri and brunch and dinner at the weekend. She had a good kitchen in her flat with fridge/freezer, oven, hob and microwave anyway so was able to make the odd emergency beans on toast if necessary.

As it turns out she has gone on to house share for the last 2 years with 3 out of the 4 people that were in her 1st year flat.

I think catered is best but only if you are not phased by eating with people you barely know to begin with. It is a great way to make friends though. At some universities the catered halls will have regular formal suppers so if this is not what your DD will like, go self catering. My DD had been to boarding school so liked this type of hall and had no worries about the food and, yes, it was average. She preferred to get used to university life and not worry about cooking. If students miss meals they grab a microwave meal or a salad and use the kitchenette that goes with a cluster of rooms. Or eat out.

DD2 went self catered and the kitchen was a constant mess. Food left in the oven, in the fridges, plates and saucepans not washed up, bins not emptied etc.... If you have reasonably tidy flat mates self catering should be fine, but as DD2 discovered, some people should live in a sty.