Oxbridge 2015 #2

[Molio]

Continuing Roisin's thread.

I've even succumbed to TSR, having sworn I wouldn't. Still no news here and haven't heard of news from any other source in the same subject at the same college but being very uncool tbh as the reality is that rejection after an interview would be much kinder for DS than a no ab initio. Massively cheered by a late afternoon offer from Bristol though. I thought I was chilled, I'm clearly not .

Fingers crossed for everyone still waiting and hoping. It's very hard to see them disappointed, is the problem :(

He's got an interview in Cambridge on Monday for English PD6966 so not long to prepare. I hope he can get his confidence back up over the next few days.

Hopefully, by the time he's gathered himself up, slept on it (the best medicine, I find), he'll have four whole days to make notes and do any prep he feels he was lacking. Wishing him the very best at Cambridge, webwiz, from a fellow English-parent x

Re wifi - recommend getting a wifi dongle - very cheap eg carphone warehouse - then can get wifi anywhere payg eg £2 per day - I use this often when travelling as allows me to work in the car/hotel rooms etc...

allmimsy interviews and offers should be based on merit, not skin colour. As I recall admissions tutors stalk these threads. Of course pointing out offers bias is relevant at this stage. Maybe interviewers will reflect even more. Maybe those from ethnic minorities who don't get an offer will be less likely to think it was because they lacked the merit.

My children are fine, both had great times and did well. I was shocked by Oxford's archaic cultural attitudes though luckily dd went to a liberal left wing college (at which all the waiters at the ball were black and one of the ball goers was black). It is a wonderful place, fantastic academic teaching and fantastic extracurricular opportunities, excellent mentoring by staff, but she is distanced from her brown (and, therefore, she has now been taught at Oxford, inferior, less likely to rule the world etc) family. In short I am no longer sure that I am glad she went there. She has come out with the Oxford view of the world.

Thanks PD6966 I have told him that they really won't expect him to know everything and yes a good night sleep can work wonders

I had a similar conversation tonight, webwiz, with regards to interview performance, although never quite sure how my comments will be received at the moment! My advice to DS is to take his time formulating his responses, to ask for questions to be re-phrased should he not fully understand (rather than cobbling an answer together) and to ask for time to 'think' should he need it... I'm trying not to say too much at the moment though as I don't want to be irritating! What are your words of wisdom?

Her college was and is brilliant, I can't recommend it and the staff and tutors highly enough. It was more the whole university, as most of the other colleges are very insular indeed and there is a lack of interest in the outside world except as a source of income.

PD6966 I have told DS that its ok to pause slightly before answering rather than jumping in with an answer. He has a habit of taking things off at a tangent so taking the time to think might help with that. Its difficult though as I don't want to dampen his enthusiasm by making him too self conscious about what he is saying. He can't do worse than DH's Oxford interview - when asked why he wanted to come to Oxford his reply was "er I dunno" needless to say he didn't get in. At least that's the family bar set nice and low!

Pause, yes, and OK to ask interviewer to clarify or explain a bit more.

Ha, poor DH! Now, here's a question... What is considered a 'good' question to ask the interviewer at the end of an interview, when the question is asked? Is it sufficient to say that all questions have been answered during the course of the interview or would this seem lazy/unimpressive, even if true?!

I'm not recommending this as a tactic, but I got asked why I wanted to go to university. As it had been taken as a given by everyone around me - and myself - that it was just something I'd do, the question took me back.

I laughed and said, 'I dunno, better than going on the dole I suppose.'

My interviewer - who was a lovely woman - also asked me why that particular University, and I remember saying something about the buildings being 'so beautiful.' I had never visited the town before I was interviewed, and genuinely was a bit gobsmacked. (It was wholly unlike the city I grew up in.)

I imagine in retrospect, that I came over as quite sincere and spontaneous. I can imagine these might have appeared as good qualities.

funny if I may say so it's good to be mindful of academic stats on various levels but isn't there a danger of being seen to be unnecessarily defensive and bitter about life at Oxbridge and ultimate outcomes?

< speaking as a mother of a 'brown' family>

'all of the waiters at the ball were black and one of the ball goers was black' WHAT?! You paint this as a marvellous thing yet I'm not sure why it's even noteworthy. Rather the opposite: suggests the 'liberal left wing ' college went out of its way to recruit 100% black waiters which per se could be seen as patronising.

Funnyperson , jolly interesting but maths isn't my specialist subject . Also I am not feeling quite subversive . Thanks for good points but would it be ok with you if we just had a fairly non contentious thread to support our DCs. ? Refer to Mimsy above .

BTW DC mock interview feedback was at best

Ah well .............

I suppose there is a serious point that in some cases going to an elite university can create a division between a young person and the rest of their family.

I think this was the case for me. My father bitterly resented that I had an opportunity to go somwehere, that he didn't have the chance to go. (He felt resentful that he had created opportunities for me to have more opportunities than he did.) He never once came to see me while I was a student, or helped to drive me there/pick up stuff at the beginnings and ends of terms.

From my perspective I also learned a lot socially. I learned to eat kinds of food that were never served at home. I learned to talk at meals, to argue and discuss. (Meals at my own house were eaten in virtual silence.) I think when I came back in holidays my parents wanted me to be the person I had been, and I was becoming someone different. I'd have changed anyway of course, but the particular nature of my higher education accelerated this.

Most parents here seem keen for their children to go for Oxford and or Cambridge, if that's what the children themselves want. But it probably is worth remembering that - in fairytales at any rate - getting your wishes granted can be a rather complicated business.

Obviously I am hoping that everyone's children find the experience of an interview interesting and enjoyable, and that they end up going to university somewhere where they really flourish as human beings.

I love the fairy tale comparison Marianne!

funny - we all completely understand your point but it is the teenagers choosing universities not us. I have no influence over my extremely determined daughter! My role is in supplying the pumpkin, rats and correct dress to go to the 'ball' (sorry interview).

Whether she gets an offer is in the lap of the gods and I will quite happily find something to love about all her university choices. What concerns me is that all the friendly university staff who were giving me information about the practicalities of the day have been scared off this thread. For the next month, would it be possible for me to concentrate the immediate matters?

Pumpkin - check
Rats - check
Ballgown - stitch up massive rips and check it has been dry cleaned - check

Warning. Avoid all colleges that offer candidates glass slippers. Wearing a glass slipper over three academic years can cause permanent damage.

Advise that all footwear offered should be comfortable and appropriate. When glass slippers are dangled, the correct answer is, 'Thanks, but no thanks. I must go now. I have fireplaces to sweep.

Funnyperson, from observation my guess is that a surprisingly large proportion of LSE's UK students are "visibly" ethnic. My guess is that the same is true of Imperial. Given entrance requirements are high, not far off Oxbridge, either Oxbridge academics are, as you suggest, deliberately not selecting ethnic students or, significant numbers of ethnic students are preferring London.

Reasons might include:

1. London based students preferring to remain at home to save money. (LSE seems to attract a disproportionate number of students from London, and London is very multi-ethnic.)
2. Ethnic students preparing to study somewhere which is very multi cultural and where they will not feel a minority. Or somewhere which is not historic or "collegey".
3. They are influenced by the relatively higher prestige attached to institutions like LSE and Imperial overseas, than perhaps in the UK.
4. Earnings potential. I would hazard a guess that ethnic students tend to be more focussed on quasi-vocational degrees such as economics, law, engineering or accountancy rather than classics or Norse studies. I don't know but would then guess that these subjects at Cambridge tend to have a higher proportion on non-Caucasian students. Accountancy and finance is LSE's largest degree, yet not offered by Oxbridge. Ditto Imperial offers an array of specialist degrees, often seen as preferable to starting with NatSci.

I think the students are there, indeed given the strong emphasis given to education by some communities, possibly there in greater proportions than UK Caucasians. Its just that there is less sense that Oxbridge is the ultimate.

I suspect that for some BME students moving from a multicultural city to a place like Oxford or Cambridge might mean they encounter attitudes which are depressing/infuriating/tiresome. This shouldn't manifest itself at interview, but more when actually studying. Stereotypical and/or ignorant attitudes are likely to be held by some of their fellow students.

See itooamoxford.tumblr.com/

I realise this may be moving away from the 'interview support and preparation' theme of the thread. But no doubt people will start to report back on their children's interview experiences soon.

DD went for an audition earlier this year. She said that she noticed that "everyone else was white and English". She has Hispanic looks.

She was almost in tears after one of her mock interview, which were organised by the school with an outside company. It was conducted by two people who afterwards told her that the people who interview her will be "geeks like us". At least her real interview will probably be pleasanter, even if they do expose gaps in her technical knowledge.

I'm trying to support her in a very simple way, by ensuring that she has enough warm and appropriate clothes to put in her suitcase as well as printouts of relevant documents such as her personal statement, the book that she referred to in it, and written work submitted. Anything else to add to that list?

Well DD should be starting her first interview as we speak at Cambridge. just hope she's ok after the meltdown she had at the mock interview.

I agree with other posters in that it is DD's choice where she goes. Personally I'm not sure if she would be suited to Cambridge (but part of me hopes she sees the place and decides she really might like to go there). Of course she then has to be offered a place

Aww bobs, all the best to her and to everyone else's DCs. Have a to keep you going!

Well DS will be waiting to go in for his first interview now at 12, I am beside myself, luckily I am at work so can distract myself a bit but am am office day today so still have time to fret, shame I wasn't working on the labour ward today, that would have taken my mind off it a bit. Is he the first mumsnet offspring to have an interview?

Along with mine MadameJosephine yes I think so.

Thanks Yoga have had several and distraction was in the form of my dog being attacked this morning and having to take him to the vet

Good luck to everyone on here, DCs and parents.

Regarding funny's comments, I don't recognise the university my DCs went to (though they went to the other one, so maybe that's why - ?). Sounds more like it was in my day (when women and grammar school boys were also minority groups), but happy to say not now, not in our experience.

And the effect of the "bubble" subsides as the real world hits them. I pride myself I dealt with it a heck of a lot better than my parents' generation did, but then I know I'm on the decline and DCs are the hope for the future. So be proud of them, and grit your teeth silently if occasionally they patronise you. Then you won't drive them away and they'll come back soon enough.

But back to the thread: good advice on glass slippers from Marianne: they are h* on cobbles.

To the interviewees: have a ball and enjoy. Show the interviewers why they'd want to teach you.

Popping back to the thread after a long absence.

DS got a rejection letter from Oxford yesterday. He says he's ok about it but I think he's a bit disappointed. Thought he'd done well enough in the exam to get an interview.

We had a big takeaway for tea and I am not going to grumble about the state of his bedroom! Can't think what else I can do to help.