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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

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Original poster

So how are our 1st Year Uni Babies getting on ??

17 replies

lookoveryourshouldernow · 16/01/2014 01:11

....

Having been back home for the Christmas Holidays and (hopefully) now on their way back what have we learnt ???

I'll start and I quote:-

..If you are buying it - I want the these (and these and these) - but normally I get something and similar cheaper from Aldi or Lidl...

..Don't worry - I'll cook myself something later - which normally happens around 2.30/3.00 am

.. Don't stay up

..What do you mean - I have no dirty clothes - that's a rug on the floor

Not sure whether he has "grown up " but he has evolved his taste buds - chicken nuggets and Pot Noodles are long gone - it's chicken with a sprinkling of paprika now and real noodles!!!

..no going out at weekends (as it is too expensive) - Thursday nights are the new Weekend ...

OP posts:

MrsBright · 16/01/2014 18:45

As Uni staff, I can give you the alternative version....

"Buses are really amazing aren't they. You pay only a bit and they take you home. I never realised that was what they were for."

"Where do you get those yellow stickers from? You know those ones where you can get things cheaper at Sainsburys."

Student at Loans Desk in Library "Is there where you apply for Student Finance?"

Milliways · 16/01/2014 21:52

My DS couldn't wait to get back - he is loving life in a big City with lots of new friends and experiences. He did eat us out of house & home in the hols, and has had to go back to tough exams, but has been getting very good grades so far (and keeps reminding us - "It's going to get harder - don't expect these results all the time") and he has 2 jobs so is keeping solvent.

He went shopping to Sainsburys with me and said "I dream of just throwing "posh" bread etc in the trolley" . He shops in Lidl and World Foods now but at least asked for more cookery books for Christmas.

I do miss him.

happycrimblechuckie · 17/01/2014 21:38

He is not getting on well at all, had a message today to say he is 1000 short on this terms rent, I do not have the money and I know I am guarantor so I know they will come get me for it, he is in debt up to his fucking eyeballs, god knows what he does with his money, he works 25 hours a week and we have been buying 25 quids worth of food every week. He loves his corse though and has some lovely new friends apparently!! Oh if only I had seen this coming! I told everyone this would happen happy days today!

Original poster

lookoveryourshouldernow · 18/01/2014 00:40

Oh happycrimblechuckie that is bad news - not sure what to suggest...

They are adults now - so I guess that they are in control (or not) of their finances and we can't interfere - is there anyone he can get advice from to get him back on track - Students Union etc etc etc ....

Have you sat down with him - easier said than done - to work out a weekly budget.. based on his "income"

I know that "partying" is a big drain on their finances - but they know this and (hopefully) should plan accordingly - is he a big generous Party Bunny ??

OP posts:

MrsBright · 18/01/2014 08:26

Any student who can 'loose' that amount of money needs his allowance stopped immediately. And you need to do some hard thinking abut exactly what substances he's spending your money on.

mumblechum1 · 19/01/2014 06:37

DS loves Uni, and loves Liverpool (we're in the Home Counties). Loves the Scouse humour, loves his course, has loads of good friends and really couldn't be happier.

He was patently desperate to go back immediately after Boxing day.

Money wise, his dad slipped him £5k as we dropped him off in September, I guess he expected DS to make it last for the year but no, it's all gone on clubbing, fast food and clothes and now he's living on Aldi bacon and frozen veg and pasta. I'm not going to top him up, we're already paying his rent.

VegasIsBest · 19/01/2014 06:56

Happy - his uni should have a student finance office who can help
Your son with budgeting and advise.

MrsBright · 19/01/2014 16:19

You gave a naive 18 year old boy FIVE THOUSAND POUNDS in one cheque?

Dear god, I wonder about some people's common sense sometimes.

mumblechum1 · 19/01/2014 17:03

MrsB no, I didn't. His dozy dad did. I was q annoyed, he didn't consult me about it. When I told him ds has blown it all his response was just "well, he's learned a lesson now. He'll have to start budgeting".

DH frequently gives people large sums of money, sometimes anonymously, it's just the way he is

mumeeee · 19/01/2014 18:26

DD3 has amazed us. She turned 22 last week so is a slightly older first year student. But is Dyspraxic and has other learning difficulties so really more like the younger student. She actually had a lot of her student loan left at the end of term. We paid her halls rent as we did the same for her sisters. She said Bolton is cheap so that's partly why she has money left. She does go out but doesn't drink a lot. This term she has books to buy plus a 32 gigabite memory stick so it's good she has money left from last term. She is still very untidy but did help with the housework with out being asked.

amumthatcares · 19/01/2014 21:46

DD's uni doesn't start back until tomorrow but she has been back a couple of times since Christmas for exams. She was more than happy to go back as she thinks our hometown is a shithole rather lacking in decent nightlife

I couldn't believe how much she had grown up and matured since September or that this was the same person that insisted she didn't take anything with an Aldi label on when she first went, yet went willingly with me (even pushed the trolley) to do her a shop to take back with her.

While she was here the bathroom was kept clean, her bedroom kept tidy and she kept offering to help. It was quite unnerving really

She's gone back now for the term and I miss her already

Notsoskinnyminny · 20/01/2014 18:16

DDs another aldi convert, she turns lights off and lowered her radiators, which I leave on to stop her room going musty but she's still a messy bugger

Mumble I feel your pain. DH pays DSS the maintenance he used to give ex-W and the little darling has used it to keep the nightclubs where he's studying in business he also took his GF to a restaurant I can only dream of going to on NYE - the bill was £300 and then they went clubbing. He then phoned DH asking if he'd pay his rent as he had no money . He gets a full grant and bursary as ex-W (who earns £10k more than me) got her employer to pay her half in cash when eldest SC went to uni, so with the £500 he gets off his dad he's doing very nicely whereas poor DD only gets the minimum loan because DH's salary is taken into consideration and her 'father' vanished into the ether 10 years ago. Rant over, I can't blame DH for being a good man its the system that's all wrong and DD is managing and isn't resentful of her SB.

Milliways · 20/01/2014 22:46

Wow! I must stop worrying about what DS spends on socialising hearing some of these. DD spent very little when she was at Uni, but she was too busy with an intense course to have time to go out. DS is determined to have a better work/life balance.

He gets minimum loan - and put it in an ISA at Christmas as didn't touch it! We pay he rent and that is it, but he holds down 2 jobs so earns around £50pw and lives on that. They negotiate group entrance rates to clubs by phoning in advance, and get their drink from Lidl before they go . He is proud that his meals average

MrsBright · 21/01/2014 07:53

Skinnyminny - I do hope your DH said a very firm No to the rent request?

amumthatcares · 21/01/2014 14:30

Skinnyminny I couldn't agree with you more. The calculation system is a joke. It's done on combined household income but takes no account of the household outgoings...so the DC in a household with a £30k income, no other DC and no mortgage does quite nicely (and as with DD's uni, when qualifying for any part of a maintenance grant, also qualifies for a cash bursary) but the DC in a household with a £50k income, big morgage payments and lots of other DC/DSC to support gets a low loan and no bursary....rant over!!!

Notsoskinnyminny · 21/01/2014 18:24

MrsBright if he does he'll be sharing the flat with his DS after I've battered him with my evil stepmum broomstick

zizza · 25/01/2014 21:43

My dd has settled in very nicely (vet course). She's pretty outgoing so has made quite a few friends (there are only 2 others in her "flat" and they weren't vet students so she quickly had to branch out and find others. She spent most of the first term with a heavy cold/ear problems, but I think that's settled down now. No longer dancing (used to spend all her spare time in a dance studio), but has taken up rugby and was thrilled to be picked as a sub for the first team last week! We're helping out with some money towards her halls (kind of making up the money to what she would have got if she'd got a grant).

My youngest ds received a conditional offer today, so he'll be off next year (grades permitting!) - will I ever have any money.....?

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