I do think it is far to acknowledge that, just during the PhD, there are some positive aspects
Absolutely right, LRD, and that's why I always say to prospective PhD candidates that you've really got to want to do a PhD more than anything else, because otherwise it's too much like hard work, and just too difficult.
You need also to be driven, and to enjoy research and being driven. It's an odd bundle of characteristics: it's far far less to do with brilliance (I was not the most brilliant of my PhD cohort, but I'm by far the most successful as an academic) as with stickability and stubbornness.
But I loved it, and I mostly love my job.
There are real issues about gender expectations and life patterns though. Even setting aside the long working hours and the demand for presentism in the sciences My very best friend whose career has been really solidly successful and she could go further if she anted to she's just been headhunted to one the best places for her research -- is childless, and has struggled with that.
She sees herself as 'socially infertile." She met the wrong man at the wrong time I think and he mucked around with demanding her commitment and then dumping her 4 years later at the point that they were talking about marriage & children (she was just finishing her PhD). She's been pretty much single ever since it's hard for high flying women in academia to have decent personal lives unless those are established before they start the high flying bit, from what I've seen. I don't get it as she's lovely, but I don't really get men either! But I did have the husband & child so I do tend to count my blessings there (It was 20 years ago so is a painful thing but the grief hasn't not acute for a while now). And having one's husband die suddenly is a visible reason for being single IYSWIM so I got a lot of support and sympathy. My friend just tends to get the stupid advice to single people which I can deflect by talking of my dead husband -- you know "Get out there" "There'll always be someone" etc etc.
As someone said upthread a lot of female academics are single and childless. I think it's a really tough sacrifice to have to make for the work & I never ever played the I'm a parent so I'm more busy/tired/important" thing because I knew how painful this can be for people like my dear friend. It takes an extraordinary man (for a straight couple) to put aside his career for the demands of academia. Most of my colleagues have wives at home, or have wives doing far less demanding (and lower status) jobs. I can't help despising those choices, if I'm being utterly honest.
Oops I was trying to be positive ... I guess the thing is that I still think the last 25 years has been worth it! And my DS has been part of a really exciting life and seen a lot of places, and he's seen how sustaining a vocation (rather than a job) can be.