Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Flip

Original poster

Parents at department open days

24 replies

wolfbrother · 07/11/2011 14:45

My son has an offer from Bath and has been invited to the department open day. The email asks how many in his party.
We weren't intending to go with him, but a friend has said he will be the only one without parents...
What do you think?

OP posts:

crazyspaniel · 07/11/2011 15:08

I think it's unlikely he'll be the only one without parents. It's not that uncommon in my experience (university lecturer), and staff and current students are more likely to go out of their way to talk to anyone they spot who is on their own.

EdithWeston · 07/11/2011 15:15

I think you get both with and without. Those who travel some distance may be arriving with parents who would like to look around whilst they're there. Others might be local students whose parents don't feel the need.

Just ask your DS what he'd prefer.

webwiz · 07/11/2011 15:17

It will probably be a mix - DD2 is at Bath and I went with her to the department open day and there were some people with parents and some without.

Original poster

wolfbrother · 07/11/2011 15:58

Thank you all. If he wont be the only one I think he will go by himself. And we like what crazyspaniel wrote!

OP posts:

ellisbell · 08/11/2011 09:18

Where it's possible to get there by train or coach our child will be going alone if we went to an open day. If we haven't visited the university, or we need to drive them, we'll go along but not go into the department with them. We'll go to any separate parent activities if they are offered or just wander the campus/ area until we need to collect them.

At the Bath open day there were some students without parents, can't imagine they will take parents to the department day if they went alone to the open day.

funnyperson · 08/11/2011 10:25

I think its quite nice for them to go with a friend from school even if its not the same subject.

Yellowstone · 08/11/2011 11:42

Yes, at our school they often go in packs.

Moominmammacat · 08/11/2011 15:58

Sent mine to Cambridge open day ... he said he was the only one without a mummy ... but of course they should go on their own!

kritur · 08/11/2011 16:22

We started interviewing last week and it seemed that most people were with parents. Some of the local students came on their own though.

Bearcat · 08/11/2011 18:01

DS1 went to open day at Nottm University civil engineering dept. Parents were invited too and I took him up there in the car.
Parents and youngsters had a half hour chat from a couple of the lecturers altogether in the dept, and then the parents were separated and did the same tour (including a bit of a coach tour where the parents saw one of the catered halls and then the areas where the students will live in their later years at the university) as the youngsters did, but at different times of the day. We never saw them again until about 4 pm. The parents had a lovely buffet lunch with the Professor in charge and others, and the youngsters were given a voucher for the cafes the regular students used and went to lunch with them.
My son (and I) loved it there and it ended up being the place where he spent 4 very happy years. They certainly knew how to sell themselves to parents and students on that open day.
The next day he went to Bristol on the train by himself for an open day, but Bristol didn't do it for him.
DS2 went for a mass open day at Nottm one Saturday with his dad and I and it wasn't the personal day that the engineering one was, but he too went to Nottm for economics.
I think if you've got the time and you are invited why not go, the universities are trying to sell themselves to the youngsters (and parents too if you have any influence over your youngsters)!

goinggetstough · 08/11/2011 18:06

wolf when my DD applied for university we found a mixture of those with parents and those without. I went to 2 open days and those without parents were probably in the minority.
On the plus side Bath is a lovely city and even if you drop him off you could spend a lovely day in Bath. There is a bus from the university into the city centre although there is no park and ride from this location. Parking is expensive in Bath.

Original poster

wolfbrother · 08/11/2011 20:33

Thanks all.
Well he's going to Bristol tomorrow to a department open day and interview (parents not invited) and will see how it feels by himself. Then he'll make the decision about Bath. It would be easier if he went by himself because of the other DC and work...

OP posts:

BarryStar · 09/11/2011 23:08

BearCat - Ds1 and I just got back from Nottingham today! We both thought it was fab, but I hadn't been to any others with him so had nothing to compare it to.

I have to say that today almost all students were with parents. I did ask ds if he just wanted me to drop him off at the beginning of the day, but he was happy for me to go along with him, so I did, and I have to say I really enjoyed it.

Squirrelface · 15/11/2011 11:08

Is there any kind of dress code for the department open days? My daughter has been invited to several, and one includes an informal interview. Is it OK to wear a reasonably smart pair of jeans and hooded top, or will everyone else be in suits?

timidviper · 15/11/2011 11:13

My DCs both went to those within reasonable travelling distance with friends as several others were also looking but DH or I took them to those that were further afield. We attended the the uni if the invitation implied we were welcome e.g. York and Leeds but went sightseeing instead in Durham as it was clearly not aimed at parents

drcrab · 15/11/2011 19:38

I think if the open day includes an informal interview or at least an audience with a tutor then a hooded top isn't appropriate. You can team up the smart pair of jeans with a shirt and sweater or a decent top/blouse.

oldmum42 · 19/11/2011 19:49

DS1 went on his own to all open days several were "local" day-trips by train to the main Scottish cities, all within a couple of hours distance of home.
He also went to the Oxford open day (spent several days there) on his own at age 16, and to the interview later that year. That was 4 changes of train, hotel on his own etc - I think it gave him a lot of confidence when he went for the interview, as knew his way around, and knew he didn't need us there.

BTW, for his subject (Medicine), parents are actively excluded from parts of the open days anyway (open day literature stated this was the case), part of the reason we sent him on his own. Don't know if this is true of other subjects.

Most parents who did drive DC to open days went off shopping, lest they embarrass their DC, but some did hang around for the "parent lecture".

Suits for interview, smart casual for informal interview - jeans only if they are very smart, good shirt/top. I would say no hooded top. It's still an interview. Jeans and Hoody fine if it's just an open day.

Original poster

wolfbrother · 20/11/2011 09:56

I think interview dress will vary.
My son has an interview in December at an Oxbridge College. The letter states
" Please note it is NOT necessary to be formally dressed for your interviews. For example, you do not need to wear a suit."

OP posts:

goinggetstough · 20/11/2011 11:51

Agree wolf that interview dress will vary, I certainly saw someone in a black rock t-shirt and jeans... When my DC was interviewed at an Oxbridge College suits were predominantly what the majority wore. So as long as your DC doesn't mind possibly being in the minority it is fine. I know that my DC would have been unnerved to have been wearing something different from the majority. The interview itself is nerve-wracking for the normal teenager so anything to help them feel self-confident is a good idea IMO. I know that the admissions tutors will come and say it doesn't make a difference to them which is obviously how it should be, but only your DC knows what they would like to wear to feel confident.

Bearcat · 20/11/2011 16:47

Both my DS's were interviewed at Cambridge and Oxford respectively.
Neither of them owned a suit at 17 yrs old (I'm afraid that we probably just couldn't really afford for them to have a suit each, which wouldn't get much use at that stage in their lives).
Both went to their interviews in a smart shirt and trousers and whatever coat / jacket they were wearing at that time of their lives.
Neither of them were embarrassed at being under dressed, there were people like them as well as people in suits.
I just don't think it matters as long as you look smart.
Neither of them got places, but am SURE it was nothing to do with what they were wearing.

goinggetstough · 20/11/2011 18:31

Bearcat I agree I think the key thing is to look smart. I was merely trying to say (and not very well ) that although they can wear jeans etc it might put them at a disadvantage which I don't think is smart, whereas trousers and a smart shirt obviously are. My DC wore a suit and didn't get a place either!

Yellowstone · 20/11/2011 21:13

High St non-suit kit is clearly fine: the tutors are interested in essence, not attributes. But an exception (I've learnt) may be with Medicine, where a suit is evidently the way to go.

oldmum42 · 22/11/2011 14:47

Absolutely a suit for Medicine interviews - the interview letters often state suit, or smart trousers and shirt. There was a bit of a stir last year (reported by a colleague of DH), when someone turned up at St Andrews in jeans.

It is essentially a job interview, for a job in a conservative "industry".

I would say, for ANY interview, a suit (male or female) is the safest thing to wear, unless you are specifically told to wear informal attire.

mollymole · 23/11/2011 12:11

Agree with quite a lot said above about open days. Where it is some distance away and neither the student nor the parents are familiar with the area I think it is a good idea for both to go, and then the parents can look around the area if there is no good reason for them to be present on the uni site.
Clothing for interview depends on the course IMO - conservative courses require suits, male and female - arty subjects may be more informal.

Flip