Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Guest posts

Guest post: "Pop music will lift you - and your child - up"

78 replies

MumsnetGuestPosts · 03/02/2016 14:37

Just before tea most days, you'll find me back in the 1980s, feeling like I'm twirling in a pink puffball dress, my T-bars clomping to shiny synthesisers and big, doofy drums. My hands stretch down to two chubby little paws, and a little boy in dungarees smiles daftly at his mum.

This is my favourite time of day. I connect my iPad up to the speakers, and turn Spotify on. A few bursts of Wheels On The Bus and the theme tune to Postman Pat's Special Delivery Service later, and 21-month-old Evan is subjected to his daily pop disco.

The best thing about having kids, in my opinion? Being able to act like a kid again.

It was while I was pregnant, watching all my friend enjoying music with their little ones, and while Evan was tiny, that I got thinking about how we want to share music with our children. While every other hour seemed dedicated to bum-wiping, burping and bibs, listening to pop songs on the radio became a comfort and a tonic that reminded me of the wider world.

In my brightly-coloured book for pre-school children, Pop!, I write about how pop music is a liberating, life-giving thing. It's also incredible to sing, dance and dress up - to identify with songs that teach us about the world, and to explore our identities through interesting, flamboyant pop stars, such as David Bowie, Madonna, the Pet Shop Boys and Kylie.

We begin this sharing of music at baby singing classes, of course. I've done them all and could happily never hear Wind The Bobbin Up again. But sharing our own favourite songs is a very different thing. As someone who writes about music for broadsheets and women's magazines, and has DJ'd several times at the brilliant Big Fish Little Fish mini-raves, I'm a pop geek, that's true – but I also know when us parents have to give our kids room. So here are my tips for introducing your little people to pop.

  • Don't worry about curating highbrow choices. Yes, we live in a world where Bach to Baby concerts and the like introduce our kids to high culture, and we grew up making uber-cool mixtapes or playlists for our friends. Children work rather differently. I found this out in my late teens, after making my much younger brother a tape that had Joy Division and Leonard Cohen on it (the poor boy returned his Smurfs' album tout-suite). There's just as much nourishment to be found in the sound of a man singing "awopbopaloobop awopbamboom!", so start with bouncy pop hits full of silly lyrics, noises and voices. There's Little Richard's Tutti Frutti, Millie's My Boy Lollipop ("you make my soul go...GIDDYUP!"), Hot Butter's Popcorn (lots of funny bleeps), and Trio's Da Da Da (the gobbledygook title speaks for itself). Serious nerd parents, take note: this also introduces them to rock and roll, reggae, '70s electronica, and '80s German pop.
  • If your children are into specific things, play songs you like that share their subjects. For instance, my friend's son Sam was obsessed with trains as a toddler. He quickly got similarly obsessed with Kraftwerk's Trans-Europe Express quickly, and later enjoyed Kraftwerk's The Robots – he found the band's robotic voices funny, and the melody perky. Ta-da! He spent all his downtime wanting to watch their videos on YouTube. A nice break from Thomas for his parents, certainly.
  • Don't limit what you play. Evan's dad likes weirder, electronic music, which he still played while on dad duty when Evan was little – some of it not unlike the white noise that used to blare over our son's cot. That's a sound Evan still likes, so your kids' tastes might surprise you. His latest favourite to cheekily stick his tongue out to? Lazarus by David Bowie. Me neither.
  • Remember that being a good parent is about being happy yourself, too. If you've had a rubbish day at work, and playing Neneh Cherry's Buffalo Stance out loud would make things better after the nursery run – it always makes things better – then do. (Evan responded to this one with a twirl.)
  • But also don't be sad if your children don't like everything you play. They'll like what they like, whether that be the Postman Pat theme (God forbid) or whatever's high in the charts (I've already heard myself shouting "That's not music!" at the telly like my mother did). My playlist (which you can find here) contains a selection of songs that inspired Pop!, as well as tracks from the stars nodded to in it, and it's full of songs I've enjoyed alone, as well as with little ones. Let it inspire your own. Then grab a moment in the day, pump up the volume, grab those paws. Whatever happens, I guarantee pop will lift you up.
OP posts:
Backingvocals · 03/02/2016 20:03

well we're just going to have to disagree there. I am regularly moved to tears by some of his songs that I have been listening to for 35 years and I still hear something new every time.

AllThePrettySeahorses · 03/02/2016 20:06

Loads of snobbery here, especially when considering much of the music we call classical today was merely the pop of its time; Mozart and Chopin wanted bums on seats too, you know. Agree with op in that it's good just to listen to music - we listen to anything cheerful and slightly cheesy in our house, whether it be Steps, show tunes, Disney songs, Strauss or Vivaldi. As long as you and your family are genuinely enjoying it, as opposed to enduring it because you think you should because it's "intellectual" or something, then what does it matter if you are moved by Berlioz or by Bryan Adams?

MistressMerryWeather · 03/02/2016 20:15

You have reminded me how much I love Neneh Cherry.

We actually did have an impromptu boogey to Buffalo Stance this evening while 'cleaning' DS1s bedroom. He now loves to say 'Sucka'. :o

Backingvocals · 03/02/2016 20:16

yy to Neneh Cherry. They played 7 seconds on the radio the other day - haven't heard that in years. Smile

PirateSmile · 03/02/2016 20:16

Anybody who uses the word 'curating' is a pretentious twat.
Nobody in the North, where I live, ever uses it, thank fuck.

MistressMerryWeather · 03/02/2016 20:18

Do you have the same urge for spandex as I do right now Backingvocals?

And slush socks.

Backingvocals · 03/02/2016 20:24

ooh yes. Might have to fire up youtube so I can show bore the DCs Grin

ouryve · 03/02/2016 20:32

Radio 1 and Magic are mostly noise!

They also don't play a comprehensive selection of pop and rock music. I'd challenge anyone insisting that if it's not played by Classic FM (who, face it, tend to play heavily compressed popular classical music rather than anything that makes you think or challenges the senses) or Radio 3 then it's, somehow, technically and artistically lacking, to listen to albums like King Crimson's "In the Court of the Crimson King" or "Lizard" or to Kraftwerk's "Autobahn." 5, 27 and 4, respectively in the UK album charts and Autobahn, the single reached 11 in the UK single charts, so none of them particularly niche, in their time. Quite popular, in fact.

My boys have been exposed to a wide variety of music. DS1 seems to have developed a slightly dubious fondness for soft rock, but he's also rather fond of a good bit of 80s synth. He can take or leave King Crimson, but loves Kraftwerk.

DS2 has more interest in the The Wheels on the bus and various highly derivative songs from Thomas and Friends, but that's OK.

Bragadocia · 03/02/2016 20:34

Happily, I have never sung nor heard Wind The Bobbin Up.

DS chose Buffalo Stance when we had a ten minute dance session yesterday; hopefully he won't start asking what the lyrics are about any time soon.

Maestro · 03/02/2016 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Backingvocals · 03/02/2016 20:41

I do like disposable pop, Maestro, and so do the DCs. But that's not what sustains me. No one has shown any reverse snobbery - that would mean saying classical music is disposable and silly or not as valuable as pop music. No one has said that. All that anyone has said is that there is plenty of depth in the best of popular music and since some of it has already endured for generations, it's not exactly a flash in the pan.

ICJump · 03/02/2016 22:30

We are getting into country at the moment. Loving bluegrass too! I'm a sucker for plan b and we live adele. We play Egyptian both classic and modern, and even a little hardcore techno, Natalie merchant is a fave as are folk rock Aussies like the waifs and Paul Kelly. We sometimes listen to classical too.

I've realised I'm not good at cool or understanding music but a love voices and instruments they enrich our lives.

ouryve · 03/02/2016 22:31

In my version, I point to all the wrong things, Bragadocia. Winds the children up :o

elQuintoConyo · 03/02/2016 23:03

My 4yo son is a huge fan of Julian Breem's Memories of the Alhambra, Justice's Guns of Nazareth and any 40s-60s Christmas tunes ('Santa Claus Got Stuck up My Chimney' is a huge fave).

Old pop like Pet Shop Boys, Prince, Cure... basically anything I can sing along to makes him happy. Less so DH singing his Neil Young/Bob Dylan favourites Grin

megletthesecond · 03/02/2016 23:26

We love pop in this house. Our current ear worm is John Newman, Love me again. Always listen to radio 1 in the car.

We have '3 song tidy ups'. We each choose a track on you tube and have a mad sprint around the house to tidy and clean as much as we can in the ten or so minutes they're playing.

Maestro · 03/02/2016 23:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TannhauserGate · 04/02/2016 00:15

My children are exposed to an extremely wide selection of music. The main problem with pop, in particular, is the lyrics, many of which are wholly unsuitable for young children, or highly sexualised. Or indeed both.

You just don't have that issue with a symphony, or Jean Michel Jarre, or a film soundtrack.

YokoUhOh · 04/02/2016 00:27

Maestro - I think you're wrong.

Stevie Wonder is one of the Kings of the 3 minute pop song, which is as valid an art form as the symphony. It takes as much skill (albeit a different kind of skill) to craft a genuinely memorable pop song than a symphony. Would you put a symphony above a performance of a raga in terms of musical 'worth', or a piece of West African drumming? I doubt it, because they're incomparable - much like a pop song and a symphony.

Western classical music isn't the highest form of art (and I know and love a huge tranche of it), it's just one approach, albeit an approach which requires a specific type of training in traditionally classical ideas of form and content.

fruitpastille · 04/02/2016 05:58

It's like a bf/ff debate in here Grin

nooka · 04/02/2016 06:31

Surely most people play music they themselves enjoy to their children? In our household that means a huge variety of stuff from all sorts of genres. We didn't really spend any time thinking about what to play when they were small, and they soon let us know what they liked to listen to (ds for example often went to sleep to Iggy Po's Lust for Life, probably because it has a good bass beat). As we hated the wheels on the bus type of stuff we didn't have any of those tapes for the car etc, or anything else aimed specifically at children really.

My parents didn't listen to anything other than classical music when I was growing up, and I find it a bit sad that they seemed to have no exposure to anything of their own time (even though my mother was involved in a youth club in the late 50s). I have virtually no music that reminds me of them or of times in my childhood up to the point I started to listen to music myself. dh on the other hand has lots of music in our collection that his parents originally played, alongside the stuff we both enjoyed as teenagers and then the music we have collected together.

I love high brow music and have sung in some fabulous pieces when I was in a big choir, I like experimental music (John Cage for example) and I like really good rock, pop, ambient, sound tracks, world music etc too. I don't consider it to be lesser, just different. In the same way I wouldn't put science fiction and fantasy into a different category to great fiction. Some is trashy fun and there is a time and a place for that, but some is really excellent. After all there is plenty of pretty run of the mill classical music along with the great stuff.

Backingvocals · 04/02/2016 08:43

Literally no one has said that Maestro. You have misread what seahorses said which was that you should listen to and explore what you like and not feel obliged only to listen to classical for example because it's deemed "intellectual". Not the same as saying people only listen to classical because it's intellectual. Obviously lots of people know and love it for its own sake.

And the best pop musicians will be joining the canon.

ouryve · 04/02/2016 11:03

I don't know if anyone has caught any of the programs about the people behind pop music on bbc4, over the past month, but in the one about producers, there's a segment about how Heroes was put together. While all the individual paet s are quite simple and even crude, the layering and build up is as complex as any symphony.

0phelia · 04/02/2016 11:26

I caught up here and was going to say reverse snobbery but see Maestro beat me to it! Grin

Pop is fine but once you understand music and musical form, harmony, key change progression, rythmic changes and expression... there's no going back. You can't undo your learning.

For some, listening to pop music can be painful in how it neglects an awful lot of musical scope and understanding. (Don't get me started on incorrect harmony prevalence in pop).

We do listen to it though, sometimes.

ViviPru · 04/02/2016 12:24

Yeh and so it began. Yesterday. Introducing the 13 month old Prulet to Beyonce videos on YouTube. She humoured me for a few moments ("Dance! DANCE! Dance Like Mummy!") before turning away disinterestedly, trundling back across the room to the Ninky Nonk, pressing the Upsy Daisy button and grooving back and forth to the tinny music omitted...

I plan to try again next week with LCD Soundsystem.

candymum · 04/02/2016 13:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Swipe left for the next trending thread