looking for reassurance

[tobytortoise]

Hi

I am looking for reassurance and advice from parents whose children started reception way ahead of expectation in terms of reading, writing and maths. I fully understand and appreciate that these skills are only a small part of the overall experience of infant education. But I would be interested to know how different schools have 'coped' with differentiating for 'gifted' 5 year olds in these areas and what strategies have been successful.

Thanks

Hi,
My ds started reception being able to read fluently and by the end of reception had taught himself all his multiplication tables.
His teachers did not differentiate work for him except in the reading scheme. He got an enormous ammount of stimulation in other ways from starting school e.g.socially, emotionally and feeling part of the school.
Now in year 1 these issues do raise their heads from time to time - sometimes he has differentiated work, sometimes not. Sometimes he complains, sometimes not! I concentrate on the things he finds tricky and help im see that it's good to complete ALL work, easy or not, well and enjoy it.
Hopefully your child will enjoy the new experience of school.
Off to school now! Hope you get more advice.

Thanks Kammy, that's really helpful. Can I ask if he had any problems 'fitting in' with the other children? I know all children are very different but I wonder whether his high academic ability causes problems socially. My son is at pre-school at the moment and while he is usually a happy, sociable little boy I have noticed already that he is not mixing all that well and I think that it is because his 'interests' are generally very different to the other children. He is very quiet - almost withdrawn - there whereas he is not at all like that at home / with familiar adults and children.

Actually, school did him at lot of good socially. At nursery he seemed to struggle finding people to play with, but at school he is more confident - like he has found his 'place'. He has made many friends, probably beacuse there is a much wider group than at nursery. The other kids compete very good naturedly to see who can match his 'dot' (level) on the reading scheme and ask him to help with their work.
School has been great in that respect.

Sorry to be the one sounding a note of caution but my son had a similar experience, starting reception with very fluent reading (The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe) and knowing his tables.

The infant school put him on the gifted register (doesn't mean a lot) and said his work was differentiated by outcome - i.e. he did the same as everyone else but could read and write!

At times I complained and he got more advanced work. He actually did very well as it's a great infant school.

The trouble started when he reached the junior school, on the same site but with a different head. It seemed like I had to 'prove' his ability all over again, even though they knew his reading age and results.

Over the years we also tried to take part in whatever gifted activities might be available in our area - precious little!

Finally this term (year 4) his results nosedived because he was bored and I have become tired of arguing that he needs more of a challenge.

I went to see an independent school and realised the standards are higher and it was where he should have been all along. It's going to cost us a small fortune but we're now moving him. Hey, who needs to pay off their mortgage before they hit 80?

I'm glad I've found somewhere he will enjoy. He tried it for a day this week and said: "Why didn't you send me there before?" Now I feel so guilty.

What's so frustrating is that not everybody can afford to change to the education they need. Expectations in the state sector seem so low. I'm also moving my daughter, who is at pre-school and a more average pupil, after arguing with the pre-school teacher who thinks her age group are too young to start reading or writing! I thought these people were meant to be educators!

So I hope it goes well for you tobytortoise, but keep a careful eye on his progress.

My ds was very out of place in his nursery 'peer' group as he is 'old' for his year and very close to dd (17 mths older). He was a really unhappy little boy once the older ones had gone to school as he could not find any real companionship from the younger children and certainly none who could read at 3+ as he could having learnt with/from dd when she was in Reception.

In the end we found a private school nursery who would take him early, and now he is in Yr 1 and really thriving with the older age group - interestingly his friends are at the older end of this classs so generally a year or so older, and not much younger than dd!

If you are worried you will need to speak to the school and keep on top of what they are doing but also work with him a lot at home and let school be just the social educator, unless he has similar issues to my ds which can be tricky

Thank-you all so much for your replies. I have been very wary of posting on this forum as I know it can be a controversial topic, but you have all been so helpful.

Private education is not an option for us financially, otherwise I probably would investigate that route. We have just had to make the decision about his primary school place and in the end (after a lot of deliberation!) I decided to discuss his 'abilities' with the Headteachers of both the local schools. I have to say I was not keen on doing this as I was worried about their reactions. But I was pleasantly surprised - they both took it seriously, did not try and tell me that it is all just 'a trick'. They talked about their Gifted and Talented policies but I am aware that these are often not worth the paper they are written on.

He is only 3 years 8 months (and I know he's still very young!)and won't be starting reception until Jan 2009, but he joins the school nursery class after Christmas and I am hoping that the staff there will better at meeting his needs than the pre-school/playgroup he currently attends.

Thanks again for your replies, it's so helpful to read about other people's experiences.

I think it's important to remember that there are lots of different kinds of challenge - so as others say to start with even if reception isn't pushing him much academically that probably won't matter as there'll be so much challenge socially and in other ways. If there are going to be problems you'll probably begin to notice after the 'challenge' effect of starting has worn off, and if he is very bright you may find that this is true all through his schooling, and you'll get the hang of anticipating it. I was a bit of an educational nightmare for my parents, for not unrelated reasons (!), and I still have to deal with this pattern in myself. For the very brightest children I think you have to accept that academic work at school is unlikely to be particularly exciting much of the time, but that doesn't mean you can't build challenge in in other ways - learning a new sport, or instrument, or even just a new club or socialising activity which is socially stimulating.

And, as I always say on threads like the. PLEASE don't assume that private is better than state. Sometimes it it, but often it isn't. And sometimes state is better.

and do bear in mind that the child who is advanced at 3/4 may not be similarly advanced at end of year 2. I've seen a significant amount of levelling out over the past 2 1/2 years among dd's peers. I'm surprised the school won't take him into Reception in the September 2008 intake , if he seems ready, or is that still an option ? dd was full-time at just 4.