Could giftedness be misunderstood and misdiagnosed in therapy?

[Leoraflower]

If a child or teenager is considered to be in need of therapy, never intelligence tested (and somewhat hiding their abilities in order to fit in) - OR - the child is actually tested in the process and found to be gifted, but the results are pooh-poohed and they're met with the attitude "Are you really that bright if you're struggling like this?", could traits that stem from giftedness be misdiagnosed as something else?

Has anyone experienced this for themselves or their children? Any advice?

[lifeover40]

Being gifted doesn't predispose people to having mental health problems but being in environments and social groups that don't fit can take their toll after a while. Whatever the mental health problem they are having is real but they underlying causes could be the misunderstanding and bad fit they have experienced. The therapist needs to have an understanding of that in trying to support them.

[QwertyGirly]

It depends what kind of therapy it is to be honest. Some therapists may not have an understanding of what giftedness is.

But I do know some parents who will say things like 'DS is really struggling at school because he is so clever that school bores him, so he misbehaves'. I'm not that keen on this type of approach.

Personally, I have not had my DS 'tested' for any kind of IQ test or anything. He has done the standard school exams and SATS, and CATS tests when starting secondary school, but we decided that for him, testing isn't the right thing to do. He did struggle for a short period with mental health issues, mostly because he felt isolated, different, and not the fitting-in type. That was in primary school. Now he is in a secondary school and has met many kids who are complete geeks and he has many friends.

[Fireflygal]

DS is really struggling at school because he is so clever that school bores him, so he misbehaves

Yes, I have a lovely friend who says this about her non motivated, lazy son. He is bright but not at a level that needs additional stimulation.I think she is not doing him any favours as he isn't learning to work in subjects that don't particularly interest him. I agree CATS is where it can be picked up.

OP, what age and is the child in state or private, as the testing slightly different?

[Leoraflower]

I agree that not all behaviour problems are caused by, or should be excused with, giftedness. It's more like loneliness, depression, not fitting in socially, in this case...

I'm talking about someone who's now an adult, looking back at their life and trying to figure out things, as the diagnosis-focused model in therapy never seemed to fit particularly well.

[MyCatHatesOtherCats]

I think I understand what you’re saying and I think it absolutely could be misunderstood. Personally, I would be open to looking into neurodiversity and reading around autistic spectrum disorders in particular. Some of the symptoms match what you describe and they may co-exist with high levels of academic ability/achievement (although that’s not always the case - if you’ve met one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism).

What I would say is that many therapists and counsellors do not seem super switched on when it comes to neurodiversity - in my personal experience - and therefore may not know what they are looking for, especially in undiagnosed adult females who have learned to mask very successfully.

[FussyLittleFucker]

@Leoraflower your update definitely points towards neurodiversity, specifically ASD - the Asperger's profile although no longer diagnosed as that.
It's known that neurodiverse teens (often those fitting the Asperger's profile and/or those with higher than average intelligence) are much more prone to anxiety and depression than others.

[Leoraflower]

But what if neurodiversity has already been focused on, but it didn't help much?

[MyCatHatesOtherCats]

I suppose it depends on whether neurodiversity was fully explored in a constructive manner by someone knowledgeable, or whether it was a superficial discussion by someone who didn’t know much about it (which definitely wouldn’t help much). Personally, I’d be inclined to go back and do a bit more reading.

It’s certainly true that the flip side of giftedness and being “so clever” can be precisely why some gifted children struggle (I’m using gifted in a broad sense), simply because they cannot perform at that level in every aspect of their lives so the expectations can be unbearable, and also because (in my personal experience) academic intelligence doesn’t always mean emotional intelligence, etc.

[Leoraflower]

Like many other children, suspicions of mild ADHD or ASD was the reason I was sent to therapy in the first place.

Because of that, I've spent years with therapists trying to pin every feeling or trait on ADHD or ASD. It has not helped me, my quality of life has not improved, and I'm trying to check out other possible explanations without claiming anything for sure yet.