How did you find out your DC was G&T?

[BeenThereTooSEL]

My DD is 1y and we think she may be bright or possibly G&T.

How would we find out? Who did you speak to?

And what were your DCs like at 1y?

I didn't really notice she was gifted. I realised she was bright and thought she'd level off, then I just thought she was bright in the usual way, but with the advantage of a parent who interacted with her a lot, which not all dc have. I also assumed she was an outlier for most of her primary years because of the cohort, rather than because she was genuinely an outlier. It was really her primary in ks2 that made me believe she was actually gifted.

With hindsight it was as a toddler when the first signs it wasn't just early progress that would level off were noticeable. Not so much in terms of what she could do, but in terms of how she thought and understood it. I used to explain things in child appropriate terms of how I think, rather than the usual methods to explain to dc, and that made sense to her too.

On the tantrums/ screaming dd never really did. Her anger was always the cold sort, but you could nearly always avert it with logical explanation. Behavior wise it was more she could debate her opinion at length, and use sarcasm/ quick witted come backs at an early age, rather than screaming.

All I've ever done is the things normal parents do anyway, and followed her lead. Smack on average dc might have been admiring dinosaurs at a museum and pointing out the colour of other cars at preschool age, rather than discussing evolution and making calculations of speed/ time/ distance, but the sentiment is the same. I didn't do anything different per se.

She's 12 now, and over the years has had many toys/ books/ games etc that weren't usual for her age, but I've never really planned for them. Either she asked, or expressed interest and I've followed it through.

Ditto really. Dd had no interest in reading either till reception age, therefore I left it alone.

I figured it out when Teachers started gushing about DD when she was in yr2 & still haven't stopped (8 yrs later). Nothing special to report before yr2.

Is G&T what used to be called "precocious "?

You never hear of precocious children anymore.

Anyway, no need to do anything special IME. Nor is it necessary to worry.

I don't think it's precocious, no.

Please tell me this is a wind up

I agree that good concentration can be a marker.
However all 3 of mine have been identified as G & T at various points, can't say it really means anything. I would say they're all quite bright, but not genius or anything.
One could speak in sentences at a year or so, another one didn't speak till he was 3. By 5 it didn't make much difference. They all read fluently quite early, and still read a lot. I read to them frequently ( because I like reading and found it an easy way to entertain them) and we talked about the stories and "what ifs". They enjoyed loego and construction toys, and puzzles. At a year old, they liked the toy ( don't know what its called) where you post different shapes through holes, and things like clapping games and rhymes. Also books with a variety of animal pictures.
Just keep talking to her, give her lots of different experiences.

I did signing with dd also and I think that really helped because she could tell me what she wanted.
It was 12 years ago that she was a baby and so I think what the HV now does has changed. She came just to check health of dd and so her academic ability was never discussed, apart from the usual check that she was bright enough and did not have any mental development problems. From the number of HV whose jaws are dropping with this new remit, I think they should be more trained in the diversity they are likely to meet, or at least the old fashioned nurse's cap with a strong bow underneath.
We also had problem with dd's not sleeping through the night and the HV
was able to help with a controlled sleep programme. So this is something worth mentioning to the HV.
Also I chose to teach my child. It just seemed natural to me to do so and took quite a bit of time for me to realise not everyone wanted to teach their child. I used to make up games to help her learn or get her the bright pre school books. So if you want to do this do not be put off by others telling you it was not how they wanted to bring up their child. That is their choice, this is yours. It is also interesting how many toddlers on this forum manage to work out for themselves what it has taken mankind thousands of years to work out.
Going to toddler groups where she could build social skills was equally important.
Your initial question was when I first worked out she was G&T. I never thought she was, I always thought of her as well educated.

I don't think there is a correlation between sleep, tantrums and 'giftedness.
My ds slept ALL the time (and was still having a nap at lunchtime age 4!). He was not toilet trained until 3 1/2. He did not speak until he was 2 but then spoke in complete sentences. He did however have great 'focus' as a very young child (like clara mentioned).

He taught himself to read (nursery pointed this out) at about 3 and by 4 he could count in 2's 3's 4's 5's 10's and could add and subtract. By the time he started reception he knew most of his times tables and Reception staff formally identified him as gifted.

He is 14 now, still very bright, (qualifies for maths Olympiad, aces end of year exams in most subjects except English). However, he is barely articulate!
I would echo the musical instrument, but there is no point starting before age 6 unless it's Suzuki violin.

At age 1 just give her lots of opportunities and play. The watch and wait.

There is a link between sleep and twice exceptional children ( very bright and having a SEN). This is linked to melatonin not being switched off in the mornings.
Yes this was obvious with my DD at one and yes she had signs of brightness. However, her visual processing disorder meant that for a long while she appeared very ordinary - really till year 6.

Lonecat, that does make sense. My ds has no diagnosis, but definitely has some traits of asd.

I remember DS reciting back whole passages from his favourite book before he was one. When he started talking more clearly, he sounded like a mini professor. He couldn't do jigsaws or basic sums and learned to read at an average age. He has a high verbal IQ, struggles with maths and has dyslexia. So, yes, lots of signs were there from a very early age.

You can't tell, IMO.

DD1 was described as 'intense', 'taking it all in', didn't need much sleep, very interactive....knew all her colours including shades and silver/gold, etc., before age expectation: Now age 10, Moderate learning difficulties, operates at half her chronological age (always has done since age expectations are used), attends special primary school, will attend special secondary school and will most likely need supported living if the Government of the time don't strip funding away once the time comes.

Yet, she is a bright little thing in so many ways

DS2 is, I think, far brighter than DS1 - much quicker on the uptake and more imaginative, although a much slower talker. Also horribly stubborn and with a bastard of a temper! Currently teaching himself to read, aged 4, and once did a 200 piece jigsaw with no help. Encyclopedic memory for superheroes and books/films of all kinds.

I have thought he was brighter than his brother since he was about 1, by the way. Just something in his attitude and responses.

I am waiting to see if school say anything in Sept and if not then I'll keep my mouth shut

I thought initially that ds had developmental issues as he learned to speak late (single words at 3, sentences at 4) and he was slightly upsessed with clocks, numbers, puzzles, cars, mechanical stuff.

His teachers highlighted that he had a good understanding of numbers from nursery, and has been on G&T list at school since year 3, which is a good age to make the difference between a child who is early in developing, and a child who has an exceptional talent. He is only G&T in maths, but good and confident in all subjects at school.

1 is wayyyyy too young to know if a child is G&T. For example, I am a childminder and have been working with a little girl who could speak in sentences at 12 months. In my book, that's on the very early side of development. Being able to sign a few words at 11 months is great but not exceptional, in my understanding of child development.

Yes to concentration as well. Ds could concentrate for ages on a toy, to the point where I would be worried about it. At nursery he would sit for ages in front of the clock. He would repeatedly make puzzles and shape sorters. He would make balls with playdoh and sort them in order of size, sort cars by colour, line up toys over and over again in parallel lines.

And by the way I was identified as clever at a very young age. And it was the worst thing that people could have done. I cruised through school assuming I didn't have to work, ever. And I got a really horrible shock when my very arrogant little self got into an Oxbridge college and I had literally no idea how to work, and i crashed and burned.

This was me. I think it can be very damaging to continually impress upon a child how clever they are, but of course there will be many, many others out there who have had the opposite experience...

DS1 is G&T. He generally seemed quite 'bright' as a baby/toddler and picked things up quickly, but he barely spoke a word until he was three. He was very laid back, never tantrumed and slept very well. He's ten now, and whilst very able academically he did really struggle socially until fairly recently. His social skills were years behind his other skills.

DS2 on the other hand was speaking in sentences at 15m, is very social and has a large vocabulary plus is very interested in anything his big brother is into (space, minecraft, science). Consequently he gets lots of people saying what a clever boy he is (he's almost 4), but I am pretty certain that actually he is very average for his age in most things.

Just keep reading and talking to your DD, and make sure she gets plenty time to socialise. You don't need to do anything else at a year old IMO.

I have a genius level IQ. I didn't talk until I was two and a half.

So... in your position, I wouldn't book the hotel for your child's Oxbridge graduation ceremony yet, but there's no harm in hoping and saving for it.

Just encourage your child to do what they find interesting, and they will find their path. :)

At under a year old, as others have said, it's impossible to tell. The HV will however have seen many hundreds of babies of that age so will be pretty good at spotting the ones who are a bit more advanced. The Mensa and Potential Plus websites have some excellent information but none of that will be really informative or indeed applicable until your DD is closer to 3 years old and you can start to look at other milestones and so much can change in that time. Honestly I would say not to speak to anyone for now. If she's still seeming very advanced at 3 then go and have a look at those websites but for now just enjoy your DD for who she is and carry on as you have been. Any educational specialist worth their salt will tell you the same and if they do seem to want to start testing her then be very wary as they are only in it for your money because the results at her age will be utterly meaningless.
With regard to your second question, My DS is now 8 and is considered G+T by his school in some, but certainly not all, subjects. At your DD's age he could talk in full sentences and he never did baby signing because he started talking at six months old so didn't need to sign anything as he just asked instead. I had no idea this was anything other than normal until his nursery pointed it out to be honest as he's my only child and I work full time so never did baby classes of any sort to compare his speech with other babies. As someone else has mentioned above, this rapidly progressed to a very early understanding and use of wit and sarcasm, he never had tantrums as he was very good at simply arguing his point (normally annoyingly rationally! :-) ) Socially he gets on far better with adults than his peers and always has done.

Gifted and Talented just means bright, top 5% IIRC? It's an awful label and I think it should be scrapped. My experiences, which I only realised were extra ordinary thanks to dc2.
Talked early
Could be read to for extended periods of time (45 minutes daily before he was one, always those blinking In The Night Garden books)
Interest in numbers, totally freaked me out aged just over one when he traced numbers in one of his books
Content to sit in buggy and observe, learn as you go pretty much!
Learned to potty train easily aged 2.5
Taught himself to read in a week
Has interests above and beyond his current age (5)
Freaks me out with his questions.

If it's any help I was reflecting this morning on what he liked to do at dd's age (2.5). We would look at the bus numbers where we lived in London and plan trip around them, one involved him choosing the number, planning where we'd ride it to, which underground line we'd get to which mainline station and then how we'd get back. Dd likes to jump.

The only people I talk to about it in rl is my primary school teacher friend who keeps going on about how exceptional he is. (Started by her I must add!) She says just let him be a child so while I think 1 is definitely too young to tell I would pass that advice onto you. If she's bright then it will out, believe me!

Or her even, sorry got carried away with my own!

supposedtobe six months old? Really? What was he saying?!

Seeing this thread made me smile - it absolutely confirms the complete lack of understanding of the general public regarding G&T kids. We have a long long way to go before these kids are understood and catered for in the appropriate way. As a parent, it's an isolating experience, and this thread is a prime example of why, sadly.

For what it's worth, BeenThereTooSEL, my DS started reading words at 16 months, having spent a few months before that transfixing on the words (rather than pictures) in the books that I was reading to him. He's now 2 and 8 months and can read through his Peppa Pig books independently. No hothousing, nothing. Just a gift that he was born with.

heljack Wed 17-Aug-16 14:01:29
"Seeing this thread made me smile - it absolutely confirms the complete lack of understanding of the general public regarding G&T kids. We have a long long way to go before these kids are understood and catered for in the appropriate way."

I don't think it is a lack of understanding so much as a conviction born from experience (older children, several children, large extended families) that "these children" are not one homogenous group who should all be understood in the same way.

My own experience seems to suggest:

that many children have uneven profiles, meaning that a child who is very gifted in an area that is easy to show off (e.g. verbal skills or fine motor skills) may seem much brighter than another child whose gifts are less easy to demonstrate

that children develop at different rates so that some children who seemed behind at 1 or 2 may blossom and seem incredibly bright at 10 or 14, while other children tend to plateau

that though some children combine giftedness with social difficulties, other highly gifted children are also skilled socially- and some children who struggle socially are not gifted

that children change

As a child I was always considered the gifted one of the family, because I could talk the hind leg off a donkey and taught myself foreign languages from an early age. My db passed under the radar, because his skills were less obvious. Once we got to secondary, it was clear that he had a gift for mathematics that has totally passed me by, was unusually musical and had a far greater gift for abstract thinking than I have ever had. We were both given opportunities and encouragement by our parents and are in similar academic fields, but he is by far the more successful.

Funnily enough, I was the one struggling socially as a child while he was a sunny child who made friends. Now most people who know us would consider me the social one, while he struggles to talk to people who do not share his intellectual interests.

both of my DC are bright. DS2 has a reading age well above his own and he's always been bright as a button. He is also very outgoing and knows he is clever. DS1 is a shy child and has no faith in his own intellect. For example he came 1st in an island wide coding competition last year but still thinks he is thick .

I just know I have clever children and will support them without pushing. I don't need a burn out at A level!

Not G&T here, but 2 bright boys with different self belief. My parents always told me I was clever and I have always thought i am, no label of G&T here, just parental affirmation. I intend to use the same tactics with my lovely boys.

DD2 wasn't anything remarkable as a baby or toddler, infact we thought she might even be a bit slow compared to her very bright/chatty older sister.

But when she was about 3 my Mum moved to a new area, and only the 2nd time we drove there DD2 already knew the way, exactly (saying 'go right...go left' etc to me).

Still 3, her nursery told us she had an unusual affinity for numbers, and had been observed doing simple mental arithmetic in her head.

At 4 DD2 could suddenly read. It was bizarre. I certainly never taught her, and there hadn't been time for her to learn at school. She just could. At 5 she was free reading the Rainbow Fairies books. At 6 she read The Hobbit and A Christmas Carol.

Her memory is eidetic, as far as we can work out. She remembers everything.

At 9 she could finish DD1's 11+ homework faster than DD1. Despite having never seen anything like it before, and not having had any tutoring.

Her primary school never officially told us she was G&T, but they did arrange for her to attend several maths workshops for high ability children.

We sent her to the same 11+ tutor that DD1 had seen because we thought it only fair. After her first session with him, he told me 'I think we have a winner here'. He later told me he had never had a pupil so adept.

DD2 scored 277 out of a possible 280 in her 11+, and I know she finished both papers in just under half an hour (a friend was moderating and watched her).

She's now at a girls' grammar, and in the top set for maths. She's predicted virtually all 8.9s at the end of Yr 8. She rarely has to revise anything, probably because her memory is eidetic.

Interestingly, she doesn't need much sleep. Even more interestingly the grammar have also never officially told us she is G&T either (although it is noted next to her name in the form register).

My dd is 5 and at school seems average I would suggest but she is far from it.
Her class is full and has many dc with complex needs and behaviour issues, the average or brighter dc are often left with the same books all week for example.

My dd at Halloween said "it's not a ghost it's a paranormal apparition "
She can count to twenty in 3 languages, is an amazing crafter, taught herself to swim at 3 and dive at 4 and is extremely articulate.

She was having proper conversations at 13/14 months and her recall is amazing.
I do as much as possible with her and wish the school could see just how bright she is, she admittedly can be a bit lazy!
I'm just happy though that she's such an inquisitive little girl with a real thirst for knowledge, she will go far by being like that.