How did you find out your DC was G&T?

[BeenThereTooSEL]

My DD is 1y and we think she may be bright or possibly G&T.

How would we find out? Who did you speak to?

And what were your DCs like at 1y?

[user1477282676]

Aw. I thought my DD1 was gifted. She could speak at one year old and by 18 months was conversing fluently.

She was also sensitive and bright.

She's 12 now and very ordinary. She's good at literacy...very good...but not gifted. It's normal to think your first baby is Einstein.

[timelytess]

I'm not looking to coach her into anything. I think that's a pretty nasty jibe. I hope you feel better for it
MN for you. Don't let it get to you.

My G+T baby said her first sentence at seven months and was recognising written words from nine months. She learned to read 'properly' at twenty-seven months, at her own request.

At thirteen months she was able to strike up conversations with strangers, who seemed as delighted by her as we were. I remember this particularly because she came back to me one day to ask 'How old am I, Mummy?' and was told 'You are thirteen months old. One year and one month,' which she dutifully relayed to the stranger-family she had entered into conversation with.

She's 34 now, married to a G+T man and with a G+T dd of her own.

[Wayfarersonbaby]

Like OhtheRoses I knew from about 6 weeks. DD was a very alert baby who hardly slept (but didn't cry much either); but she didn't talk super-early or anything like that. It was more that she clearly had an amazing grasp of the underlying concepts behind things, and never seemed to need to practice anything. She had amazing fine motor skills and acute eyesight which helped, but you could see an amazingly precise intuition about things going on. At 5 weeks she realised that she could use a round O-ball toy to make the dangling bits on her baby gym swing, and set about hitting them from different sides to see them move. At two months she was passing toys from hand to hand and turning them round as she did so to see their shadows change shape on a wall. At three months she would turn the pages of a board book without prompting when we were reading to her. So we worked out pretty early that she was very bright, and it wasn't correlated to early talking or anything like that - in fact she had her "language explosion" at about 17 months. At nearly 4 she is close to being a free reader, and is amazingly sharp conceptually, though we are pretty relaxed about teaching her learned skills like maths. Those can always be picked up by a clever child.

It helps I think that both DH and I were what would now be called G&T when we were young (I also had an eidetic memory, like MaQueen's DD, which disappeared in my early twenties, oh how I miss it!) Though I was in mainstream school (and hated it), DH was accelerated in G&T programmes (and hated it). So we're very aware of the pitfalls that await very bright children, and we are aiming to get a balance between helping DD but making sure she is as happy and socially rounded as possible.

Always be aware, though, that as problems go it is a pretty enviable one. With love and family support, most very bright children end up forging their own path and doing fine even in the absence of tons of learning support. There is something to be said for allowing them to develop other skills and not focusing too much on their talents - learning how to work hard and persistently, to be a good friend and develop their artistic or physical skills as well as their academic skills. The worst that can happen really is that they slightly underachieve where they could have got if they had been hothoused at Westminster etc.; but they are unlikely not to succeed in life. I give thanks for having my bright DD when lots of friends have had heartache in their lives and their children - really, I can't worry too much about the finer details of what she's achieving when in the wider scheme of things it is a joy to have such a clever energetic young thing. I want her to enjoy stories, imaginative play, make friends, have interesting experiences, be bored, be a bit frustrated (it's really important for bright kids occasionally to be bored and frustrated). Please don't worry about what your 1 y o is doing, just enjoy being with them and interacting! Read them loads of stories; sing them songs! Much better than anything else at that age!

[Degustibusnonestdisputandem]

"Who", not "that"

[Degustibusnonestdisputandem]

Why are people so focussed on their kids being gifted and talented? I spoke properly at 12 months, read at 3 years old, taught myself multiplication from a book before I was 4, etc. etc. I can remember being aware of myself as a person well before I was 2. Guess what? I'm not in any way shape or form successful. Quite the opposite in fact, I would class myself as an abject failure; as intelligent as I supposedly am...I'm not a 'get shit done' person. They are the ones that are ultimately successful, imo.

[lorelairoryemily]

Haha this made me laugh a little op im sorry, I'm not laughing at you though!! It just reminded me of a girl I used to work with who told a client that she was going to have her son tested because he was a genius. He was 2. The look on the clients face! Just enjoy your lovely baby, if she's gifted(and she may well be) it'll show itself in good time.

[Chelazla]

I agree relax and enjoy your baby!

[spaghettihoopsagain]

I would just live life with your child, talking to them along the way about everything you do and why you are doing it. See what they enjoy doing and go with it! I think it is very hard to tell whether a child is G & T at 1year old. Our oldest child wrote her name aged 2 years and 3 months - people were totally amazed at her and amazed at her early language. Now she is certainly not G &T - she struggles with spelling and finds writing a challenge too. Our son, who is G&T was referred for speech therapy age 18 months as he had few words, but was chatting a lot by age 2.5. He didn't write his name at age 2 like our daughter. Every child is different and it's hard to tell their future age 1!

[kalidasa]

A

[user789653241]

I totally agree with JustRichmal.
I didn't actively teach my ds to read, but he was exposed to letters, sounds, words, books, etc from early age. And had huge interest in them.
So the environment enabled him to learn to read with ease, but not really taught himself to read without any input.

[JustRichmal]

It does sound like they picked it up from being read to, rather than teaching themselves. It could be that they pick it up like learning to speak a language.

[eeyoresgrumpierfriend]

Oh yes, we always read lots to both DC and I always tracked my finger along the words as I read do sure that was where he got it from. We just hadn't done any sounding out of letters etc... nor had anyone else.

MaQueen DS has a phenomenal memory too - he remebers everything he has ever read.

[MaQueen]

just I know no one else in the family had been showing her words etc (I checked) and her nursery confirmed they hadn't done anything like that with her either.

Her older sister is only 12 months older so wasn't really reading much herself yet, to be honest.

So, all I can think is that she gleaned stuff from the TV, and from me just reading to her and her tying in the sounds with the black squiggles? Also because her memory is eidetic (we think, it's never been formally tested) she only had to see a new word once, to then always know it.

[JustRichmal]

With regards to the "teaching themselves to read", the following could solve the mystery.

Someone in the family, eg, Grandparent or Aunt, may have been reading stories to them and pointing to words as they read. Quite a few parents do this, and it is a quite effective way of teaching them.

They could have been watching Alphablocks on Cbeebies.

They may have been playing with a toy computer designed to teach reading.

They may have been shown words at nursery.

Older siblings may have been playing at teaching them.

Usually they have had some input from somewhere rather than just working out for themselves that the strange black squiggles on a white background relate to particular sounds which form into words.

[MaQueen]

Eeyore our DD2 didn't walk until nearly 18 months, and wasn't chatty at all. To be honest we thought she was going to be a bit dim especially compared to DD1 who was very talkative and physically forward.

DD2 also could suddenly read. God knows how, but she somehow self taught. She progressed from the very first '4 words per page' Biff, Chip & Kipper books to the '20 words per page' Golden Key ones in about 2 months at most. It was almost spooky.

What I find interesting is the massive contrast between her at 18 months, and then how she was at about 3 (bit like you, her nursery asked us if we'd known she could already do simple mental arithmetic).

And yet, DD1 was physically very coordinated/adept from being a toddler and still is (played 2 county sports, and the darling of her PE teachers). But, intelligence wise has ended up 'pretty clever' (she's at a grammar school) but nothing like DD2.

[eeyoresgrumpierfriend]

Oh realised I didn't actually answer the question. We found out DS was G&T on his first day at nursery (aged 2.5) when we got a call from them asking us why we hadn't mentioned he could read. Still no idea how/when he managed to teach himself.

[eeyoresgrumpierfriend]

My G&T child did literally nothing as a baby. Didn't walk until 18 months, never crawled, slept very well, late talker...

By contrast, my non G&T child could walk by 9 months, was talking in full sentences by 12 months...

By the time they were 3 it was a completely different story.

[Zoflorabore]

My dd is 5 and at school seems average I would suggest but she is far from it.
Her class is full and has many dc with complex needs and behaviour issues, the average or brighter dc are often left with the same books all week for example.

My dd at Halloween said "it's not a ghost it's a paranormal apparition "
She can count to twenty in 3 languages, is an amazing crafter, taught herself to swim at 3 and dive at 4 and is extremely articulate.

She was having proper conversations at 13/14 months and her recall is amazing.
I do as much as possible with her and wish the school could see just how bright she is, she admittedly can be a bit lazy!
I'm just happy though that she's such an inquisitive little girl with a real thirst for knowledge, she will go far by being like that.

[MaQueen]

DD2 wasn't anything remarkable as a baby or toddler, infact we thought she might even be a bit slow compared to her very bright/chatty older sister.

But when she was about 3 my Mum moved to a new area, and only the 2nd time we drove there DD2 already knew the way, exactly (saying 'go right...go left' etc to me).

Still 3, her nursery told us she had an unusual affinity for numbers, and had been observed doing simple mental arithmetic in her head.

At 4 DD2 could suddenly read. It was bizarre. I certainly never taught her, and there hadn't been time for her to learn at school. She just could. At 5 she was free reading the Rainbow Fairies books. At 6 she read The Hobbit and A Christmas Carol.

Her memory is eidetic, as far as we can work out. She remembers everything.

At 9 she could finish DD1's 11+ homework faster than DD1. Despite having never seen anything like it before, and not having had any tutoring.

Her primary school never officially told us she was G&T, but they did arrange for her to attend several maths workshops for high ability children.

We sent her to the same 11+ tutor that DD1 had seen because we thought it only fair. After her first session with him, he told me 'I think we have a winner here'. He later told me he had never had a pupil so adept.

DD2 scored 277 out of a possible 280 in her 11+, and I know she finished both papers in just under half an hour (a friend was moderating and watched her).

She's now at a girls' grammar, and in the top set for maths. She's predicted virtually all 8.9s at the end of Yr 8. She rarely has to revise anything, probably because her memory is eidetic.

Interestingly, she doesn't need much sleep. Even more interestingly the grammar have also never officially told us she is G&T either (although it is noted next to her name in the form register).

[FunnysInLaJardin]

both of my DC are bright. DS2 has a reading age well above his own and he's always been bright as a button. He is also very outgoing and knows he is clever. DS1 is a shy child and has no faith in his own intellect. For example he came 1st in an island wide coding competition last year but still thinks he is thick .

I just know I have clever children and will support them without pushing. I don't need a burn out at A level!

Not G&T here, but 2 bright boys with different self belief. My parents always told me I was clever and I have always thought i am, no label of G&T here, just parental affirmation. I intend to use the same tactics with my lovely boys.

[corythatwas]

heljack Wed 17-Aug-16 14:01:29
"Seeing this thread made me smile - it absolutely confirms the complete lack of understanding of the general public regarding G&T kids. We have a long long way to go before these kids are understood and catered for in the appropriate way."

I don't think it is a lack of understanding so much as a conviction born from experience (older children, several children, large extended families) that "these children" are not one homogenous group who should all be understood in the same way.

My own experience seems to suggest:

that many children have uneven profiles, meaning that a child who is very gifted in an area that is easy to show off (e.g. verbal skills or fine motor skills) may seem much brighter than another child whose gifts are less easy to demonstrate

that children develop at different rates so that some children who seemed behind at 1 or 2 may blossom and seem incredibly bright at 10 or 14, while other children tend to plateau

that though some children combine giftedness with social difficulties, other highly gifted children are also skilled socially- and some children who struggle socially are not gifted

that children change

As a child I was always considered the gifted one of the family, because I could talk the hind leg off a donkey and taught myself foreign languages from an early age. My db passed under the radar, because his skills were less obvious. Once we got to secondary, it was clear that he had a gift for mathematics that has totally passed me by, was unusually musical and had a far greater gift for abstract thinking than I have ever had. We were both given opportunities and encouragement by our parents and are in similar academic fields, but he is by far the more successful.

Funnily enough, I was the one struggling socially as a child while he was a sunny child who made friends. Now most people who know us would consider me the social one, while he struggles to talk to people who do not share his intellectual interests.

[heljack]

Seeing this thread made me smile - it absolutely confirms the complete lack of understanding of the general public regarding G&T kids. We have a long long way to go before these kids are understood and catered for in the appropriate way. As a parent, it's an isolating experience, and this thread is a prime example of why, sadly.

For what it's worth, BeenThereTooSEL, my DS started reading words at 16 months, having spent a few months before that transfixing on the words (rather than pictures) in the books that I was reading to him. He's now 2 and 8 months and can read through his Peppa Pig books independently. No hothousing, nothing. Just a gift that he was born with.

[mrsvilliers]

Or her even, sorry got carried away with my own!

supposedtobe six months old? Really? What was he saying?!

[mrsvilliers]

Gifted and Talented just means bright, top 5% IIRC? It's an awful label and I think it should be scrapped. My experiences, which I only realised were extra ordinary thanks to dc2.
Talked early
Could be read to for extended periods of time (45 minutes daily before he was one, always those blinking In The Night Garden books)
Interest in numbers, totally freaked me out aged just over one when he traced numbers in one of his books
Content to sit in buggy and observe, learn as you go pretty much!
Learned to potty train easily aged 2.5
Taught himself to read in a week
Has interests above and beyond his current age (5)
Freaks me out with his questions.

If it's any help I was reflecting this morning on what he liked to do at dd's age (2.5). We would look at the bus numbers where we lived in London and plan trip around them, one involved him choosing the number, planning where we'd ride it to, which underground line we'd get to which mainline station and then how we'd get back. Dd likes to jump.

The only people I talk to about it in rl is my primary school teacher friend who keeps going on about how exceptional he is. (Started by her I must add!) She says just let him be a child so while I think 1 is definitely too young to tell I would pass that advice onto you. If she's bright then it will out, believe me!

[Supposedtobeworking1]

At under a year old, as others have said, it's impossible to tell. The HV will however have seen many hundreds of babies of that age so will be pretty good at spotting the ones who are a bit more advanced. The Mensa and Potential Plus websites have some excellent information but none of that will be really informative or indeed applicable until your DD is closer to 3 years old and you can start to look at other milestones and so much can change in that time. Honestly I would say not to speak to anyone for now. If she's still seeming very advanced at 3 then go and have a look at those websites but for now just enjoy your DD for who she is and carry on as you have been. Any educational specialist worth their salt will tell you the same and if they do seem to want to start testing her then be very wary as they are only in it for your money because the results at her age will be utterly meaningless.
With regard to your second question, My DS is now 8 and is considered G+T by his school in some, but certainly not all, subjects. At your DD's age he could talk in full sentences and he never did baby signing because he started talking at six months old so didn't need to sign anything as he just asked instead. I had no idea this was anything other than normal until his nursery pointed it out to be honest as he's my only child and I work full time so never did baby classes of any sort to compare his speech with other babies. As someone else has mentioned above, this rapidly progressed to a very early understanding and use of wit and sarcasm, he never had tantrums as he was very good at simply arguing his point (normally annoyingly rationally! :-) ) Socially he gets on far better with adults than his peers and always has done.