I wanted to post this here as I'd be really interested in others viewpoints as I have recently been doing a bit of internet research including coming across this site, mainly because of various issues and observations that have been made about my son by his school in the two years he has been there (not all at the same time I might add). We have heard possibly "autistic" "G&T", "Dysgrahia issues", "dyspraxia issues" amongst other things from different teachers, none of whom have any qualification to make that diagnosis but are all, without fail, excellent teachers and only doing their jobs in line with the government guidelines.
I have to wonder when the world stopped recognising children as individuals! I am so disheartened by the national curriculum and this seeming urgency to pigeon hole kids into target driven, milestone ticking, boxes. It seems that the education system is almost hell bent on labelling children to the point where frankly it seems the only way a child could ever be considered "normal" is if they were in fact a pre-programmed droid!
Of course there are many children who have genuine developmental challenges and need the extra support and I don't wish to appear dismissive of that in any way. I do think recognition of educational support needs has actually come a long way over the past couple of decades but after parents evening last week I've chatted with a number of other parents from the school and all were worrying themselves sick about something or other. Teachers are obliged these days to report back on where children are with respect to national targets but for so many parents to have to deal with reports of "Behind on national targets for reading or spelling or maths, struggles to form friendships, disruptive in literacy class etc....." I do genuinely worry that parents are having so much worry piled upon them as to what their child's "special educational needs" may be that it prevents them being able to just relax and enjoy their children for who they are as individuals, feeling instead that they must constantly be comparing their child with others in their class and against what government targets would expect them to be.
If it wasn't for the fact that my son is a total carbon copy of me, I would probably now be terrified about his future and still frantically googling ways to support his "special needs" as I initially did the other day before taking a step back, taking a breather and having a more logical think about it all.
This is just a sample of the observations which are identical for both my son and me. For me they were just accepted as part of who I was as an individual back in the late 70's/early 80's but now have their own special labels against which statements of SEN can be drawn up left right and centre.
1)Talked at six months and could have a full conversation by 1 year.
Me: quite clever, son: G&T.
2)Didn't walk until 18 months old, when I did I fell over quite a lot. Can't catch a ball and in my case couldn't ride a bike until I was 8, son at 7 still can't. Me: a bit lazy and clumsy. Son: dyspraxic.
3)Terrible at maths. Me: still am, can't add up for toffee, that's what calculators are for but got a C at GCSE so that got me by. Son: "learning difficulties", may need SEN report.
4)Like to be very organised occasionally to the point of being obsessive. Hate things not being tidy, actually find it uncomfortable at times if can't put things in order. Me: good attention to detail. Son: autistic. I have a very tidy desk, my mugs all have to face the same way in the kitchen cupboard despite the fact that no one can see them bacause they are in a cupboard and the bath mat has to be abolutely central on the radiator (amongst other things).
5)Pitch perfect and astonisingly good rhythm for age. Me: was good at music, won the senior music cup once, never played anything other than recorder. Son: musically G&T, plays both violin and cello having begged us for lessons. The only use I've ever found for my perfect pitch is that I don't need to look at the level on the kettle because I can tell exactly how much water is in it by the pitch of the noise as the water runs in from the tap. Yes, really useful that one!
6)Free reading fluently at age 3, loves to read, particularly non-fiction as likes factual information and would learn and repeat facts at every opportunity to anyone who would listen and often even if they wouldn't listen. Me: good reader, bit of a geek. Son: "aspergic"
7)At age seven poor handwriting and didn't enjoy writing at all so would write the bare minimum. Me: poor handwriting, bit lazy. Son: dyspraxic, hypermobile, autistic etc.... I now have lovely handwriting and have had work published.
8)Poor concentration in certain lessons. Me: away with the faries, switches off when bored. Son: ADD
I will still stare out the window in a daze in boring meetings.
With all these "diagnoses" being banded about I would probably be terrified for my son's future if I were to read too much into all these different labels.
So, if my son ticks a lot of the traits for many different "SENs" (and he does, I'm not denying that at all) what about me? At nearly 40 I can look back and think about this with a fair bit of hindsight.
Am I autistic because I have to line things up in my cupboards, used to flap a lot (literally) as a child and would put my hands over my ears if children shouted or screamed?
On paper I fit a great many of the traits. Do I think I am? Personally no but I suspect and EdPsych would say yes. Has it held me back in life? No.
Am I dyspraxic/dysgraphic because as a child I couldn't walk in straight line without tripping over my own feet, couldn't ride a bike until I was 8 and had terrible handwriting and zero ability to keep to the lines with all my work right hand justifying if I didn't concentrate properly?
On paper yes. Do I think I am? No. Has it held me back in life? No.
Am I a genius?
On paper yes, I have a MENSA tested IQ of 154. Has it held me back in life? At times yes much more so than any of the above because once tested teachers assumed I'd be good at everything and would make a point of saying "I thought you were supposed to be clever" if I did anything badly or wrongly or struggled with something. Being a sensitive soul I found that really upsetting and wished the test had never been done.
Does having a high IQ make me any better or more exceptional than the next person?
No.
Could having SEN statements have helped me progress any better in life than just having supportive parents who accepted me for the person I was not the one the government guidelines would now dictate I should be?
I have a biological science PhD and two international patents, I'd say I did ok.
Will it matter one iota if my son doesn't have a PhD and two international patents?
No.